aussie bloke joke

[maxman]

"hello is this the police?"
yes it is , how can we help you?"
"i'm calling to report my neighbour Wazza, he is hiding cocaine in his firewood"
The next day the police raided wazzas house. Using axes they bust open every piece of firewood but find no trace of coke. They swear at wazza and leave.
then the phone rings at wazzas house. "Hey waz , did the cops come?"
" Yeah"
"did they chop up your firewood?"
"Yep."

"Happy birthday Maaaaate!!!"

[tawnyfrog]

aussie bloke joke

Ozzie Bloke's definition of foreplay #1:


"Oy, are you awake?"

[tawnyfrog]

aussie bloke joke

Ozzie Bloke's definition of foreplay #2:

"Brace yourself, Beryl".

[tawnyfrog]

aussie bloke joke

A Frenchman, and Englishman and an Ossie bloke are discussing what drives their women wild in bed.

Nigel blushes and admits that he likes to drizzle pure heather honey all over his Abigail whilst making bumble bee buzzing noises. "It makes her deliciously, unashamedly wild."

Pierre grins. "Oh no ... mon petite Yvette lurves to be tickled wiz ze long feather of the ostrich .... it drives her crazzzzeeee."

Bruce says "Nah. I slap it in, pull it out, wipe it on the curtains and Beryl goes absolutely ape-sh*t!

[hart]

aussie bloke joke

Bruce would have said curtain wrapped around his neck if I were Beryl! :H