Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
--Ask your mom.
* * *
How do you know when you're REALLY ugly?
--Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.
* * *
How do you know you're leading a sad life?
--When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Let's just be friends."
* * *
What do you get when you cross Billy Ray Cyrus
and a yeast infection?
--An itchy, twitchy twat.
* * *
Do you know why ghosts don't make noise when they make love?
--Because they have hollow weenies!
* * *
What do you get when you cross an Owl and a Rooster?
--A cock that stays up all night.
* * *
Mom's have Mother's Day, Father's have Father's Day.
What do single guys have?
--Palm Sunday
* * *
What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts?
--Her navel.
* * *
What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?
--A bingo machine.
* * *
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
--"Are you sure it's mine?"
* * *
What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?
--Beer nuts are a $1.25 but deer nuts are always under a buck.
* * *
What three two-letter words denote "small"?
--"Is it in?"
* * *
Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
--Mace will do that to you.
* * *
If you are having sex with two women and one more woman walks in, what do you have?
--Divorce proceedings, most likely.
* * *
Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
--Everyone has the same DNA
--Ask your mom.
* * *
How do you know when you're REALLY ugly?
--Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.
* * *
How do you know you're leading a sad life?
--When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Let's just be friends."
* * *
What do you get when you cross Billy Ray Cyrus
and a yeast infection?
--An itchy, twitchy twat.
* * *
Do you know why ghosts don't make noise when they make love?
--Because they have hollow weenies!
* * *
What do you get when you cross an Owl and a Rooster?
--A cock that stays up all night.
* * *
Mom's have Mother's Day, Father's have Father's Day.
What do single guys have?
--Palm Sunday
* * *
What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts?
--Her navel.
* * *
What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?
--A bingo machine.
* * *
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
--"Are you sure it's mine?"
* * *
What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?
--Beer nuts are a $1.25 but deer nuts are always under a buck.
* * *
What three two-letter words denote "small"?
--"Is it in?"
* * *
Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
--Mace will do that to you.
* * *
If you are having sex with two women and one more woman walks in, what do you have?
--Divorce proceedings, most likely.
* * *
Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
--Everyone has the same DNA
zwink:
c: :heart:
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