the closest i ever got to a 4.0 in school was my blood alcohol content
marriage changes passion...suddenly youre in bed with a relative
i saw a women wearing a sweat shirt with 'guess' on it..so i said ,implants?
i dont do drugs anymore cause i find i get the same effect just standing up fast
sign in a chinese pet store buy one dog get one flea.
i have my own little wrold. but its ok... they know am here
i got a sweater for christmas...i really wanted a screamer or a moaner.
if flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the teminal?
i dont approve of political jokes...ive seen too many of them get elected.
the most precious thing we have is life ....yet it has absolutely no trade-in value.
if life deals you lemons, make lemonade, if life deals tomatoes, make bloody marys. but if life deals you a truckload handgrenades... thats the message!
i love being married,its so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life
shopping tips. you can get shoes for 65 cents at the bowling alley
i am nobody,and nobody is perfect, therefore iam perfect.
i married my wife for her looks.. but not the ones shes been giving me lately.
everyday i beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days ive stayed alive.
if carrots are so good for the eyes,how come i see so many dead rabbits on the highways?
how come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for miss america?
isnt having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool?
why is that most nudists are people you dont want to see naked?
snowmen fall from heaven unassembled.
every time i walk into a singles bar i can hear moms wise words.dont pick that up you dont know where its been!
the differences between snowmen and snow-women are snowballs.
and it took me too long to type this bad typer
and had i had nothing to do so what the hell
have a great day now everyone[/list type=decimal]:hijacked: :disco: :wings:.. and a good way to pass the time
Comment