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    For Wordsmiths

    FOR THOSE WHO ENJOY LANGUAGE (OR SEVERE DISTORTIONS THEREOF):



    -- Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.

    -- A backward poet writes inverse.

    -- A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

    -- Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

    -- Practice safe eating - always use condiments.

    -- Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

    -- A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.

    -- A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

    -- Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.

    -- Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

    -- Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.

    -- Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.

    -- When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

    -- A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.

    -- What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway.)

    -- Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

    -- In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.

    -- She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.

    -- A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

    -- If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.

    -- With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

    -- When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.

    -- The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

    -- You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

    -- Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.

    -- He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

    -- Every calendar's days are numbered.

    -- A lot of money is tainted - It taint yours and it taint mine.

    -- A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

    -- He had a photographic memory that was never developed.

    -- A plateau is a high form of flattery.

    -- A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium
    at large.

    -- Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the
    end.
    -- Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

    -- Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.

    -- Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

    -- Acupuncture is a jab well done

    #2
    For Wordsmiths

    I'm still laughing at the fruit flies one...:H
    I don't care who you are...Your not walking on water while i'm fishing..
    One drink is too many... A thousand is never enough...Sober since July 2nd 2009

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      #3
      For Wordsmiths

      TKS!! Love em!:H :l ...Judie
      The only thing worth stealing is a kiss...:flower: zwink:

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        #4
        For Wordsmiths

        Brilliant -- :H
        ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


        Bambs aka Hydrogen



        :h XXX :h

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          #5
          For Wordsmiths

          small medium at large,horray still laughing!

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            #6
            For Wordsmiths

            Thanks Tawny - those are a hoot!

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              #7
              For Wordsmiths

              Well done, Miss Money Penny!
              AF as of August 5th, 2012

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