These are all taken from a book called Disorder In American Courts. They are questions / answers as recorded by the court official.
A = Attorney ..... W = Witness
A: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
W: He said,Where am I Kathy
A: And why did that upset you?
W: My name is Susan
A: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
W: Gucci sweats and Reeboks
A: Are you sexually active?
W: No, I just lie there
A: This Myasthenia Gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
W: Yes
A: And in what way does it affect your memory?
W: I forgot
A: You forgot? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
A: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
W: We both do
A: Voodoo?
W: We do
A: You do?
W: Yes, voodoo
A: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it untill next morning?
W: Did you actually pass the bar exam
A: The youngest son, the twenty one year old, how old is he?
W: Twenty one, much like your IQ
A: Were you present when your picture was taken?
>W: Are you shitting me?
A: So the date of conception(of the baby)was August 8th?
W: Yes
A: And what were you doing at the time?
W: Getting laid
A: She had three children, right?
W: Yes
A: How many were boys?
W: None
A: Were there any girls?
W: Your honour, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
A: How was your first marriage terminated?
W: By death
A: And by who's death was it terminated?
W: Take a guess
A: Can you describe the individual?
W: He was of medium height and had a beard
A: Was this a male or female?
W: Unless the circus was in town, I'm going with male
A: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a disposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
W: No, this is how I dress when I go to work
A: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performrd on dead people?
W: All of them, the live ones put up to much of a fight
A: All of your responses MUST be oral, OK? Now, what school did you go to?
W: Oral
A: Doctor, do you recall the time you examined the body?
W: The autopsy started at 8.30pm
e;">A: And Mr Denton eas dead at that time?
W: If not, he was by the time I finished
A: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
W: Are you qualified to ask that question?
A: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
W: No
A: Did you check for blood pressure?
W: No
A: Did you check for breathing?
W: No
A: So, then it was possible the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
W: No
A: How can you be so sure doctor?
W: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar
A: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
W: Yes, it is possible he could have been alive and practicing law
A = Attorney ..... W = Witness
A: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
W: He said,Where am I Kathy
A: And why did that upset you?
W: My name is Susan
A: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
W: Gucci sweats and Reeboks
A: Are you sexually active?
W: No, I just lie there
A: This Myasthenia Gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
W: Yes
A: And in what way does it affect your memory?
W: I forgot
A: You forgot? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
A: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
W: We both do
A: Voodoo?
W: We do
A: You do?
W: Yes, voodoo
A: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it untill next morning?
W: Did you actually pass the bar exam
A: The youngest son, the twenty one year old, how old is he?
W: Twenty one, much like your IQ
A: Were you present when your picture was taken?
>W: Are you shitting me?
A: So the date of conception(of the baby)was August 8th?
W: Yes
A: And what were you doing at the time?
W: Getting laid
A: She had three children, right?
W: Yes
A: How many were boys?
W: None
A: Were there any girls?
W: Your honour, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
A: How was your first marriage terminated?
W: By death
A: And by who's death was it terminated?
W: Take a guess
A: Can you describe the individual?
W: He was of medium height and had a beard
A: Was this a male or female?
W: Unless the circus was in town, I'm going with male
A: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a disposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
W: No, this is how I dress when I go to work
A: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performrd on dead people?
W: All of them, the live ones put up to much of a fight
A: All of your responses MUST be oral, OK? Now, what school did you go to?
W: Oral
A: Doctor, do you recall the time you examined the body?
W: The autopsy started at 8.30pm
e;">A: And Mr Denton eas dead at that time?
W: If not, he was by the time I finished
A: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
W: Are you qualified to ask that question?
A: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
W: No
A: Did you check for blood pressure?
W: No
A: Did you check for breathing?
W: No
A: So, then it was possible the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
W: No
A: How can you be so sure doctor?
W: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar
A: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
W: Yes, it is possible he could have been alive and practicing law
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