(An oldie but funny)
Horace was excited about his vacation on the beach in Florida. He imagined meeting beautiful women in tiny bikinis, glistening on the white beaches. But after three days, walking miles along the shore in his speedo, he hadn't even gotten one woman to talk to him.
Watching the popular lifeguard on one stretch of sand populated by more than the usual bathing beauties, he decided to ask for some advice, man to man, on being successful with the ladies. He asked the handsome, tanned lifeguard how he did it.
"Well," replied the lifeguard with a smile, looking down at the the pale, skinny man in front of him, "You have to get their attention. Try some sunless tanner, stick your chest out, and let 'em know you're packing."
"Packing?" asked the confused Horace.
"Yes," replied the bemused lifeguard. "Since you're wearing a speedo, enhance what you've got. Pick up a couple of big, smooth rocks and put them in your swimsuit."
Horace was incredulous, but ready to try anything. After following the liefguard's instructions, he strutted across the beach next day, and sure enough, the girls were sitting up and noticing, but laughing.
Suddenly, from the lifeguard stands, he hears, "Put the rocks in the FRONT of your suit, fool! In the FRONT!!"
Horace was excited about his vacation on the beach in Florida. He imagined meeting beautiful women in tiny bikinis, glistening on the white beaches. But after three days, walking miles along the shore in his speedo, he hadn't even gotten one woman to talk to him.
Watching the popular lifeguard on one stretch of sand populated by more than the usual bathing beauties, he decided to ask for some advice, man to man, on being successful with the ladies. He asked the handsome, tanned lifeguard how he did it.
"Well," replied the lifeguard with a smile, looking down at the the pale, skinny man in front of him, "You have to get their attention. Try some sunless tanner, stick your chest out, and let 'em know you're packing."
"Packing?" asked the confused Horace.
"Yes," replied the bemused lifeguard. "Since you're wearing a speedo, enhance what you've got. Pick up a couple of big, smooth rocks and put them in your swimsuit."
Horace was incredulous, but ready to try anything. After following the liefguard's instructions, he strutted across the beach next day, and sure enough, the girls were sitting up and noticing, but laughing.
Suddenly, from the lifeguard stands, he hears, "Put the rocks in the FRONT of your suit, fool! In the FRONT!!"
awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, 
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