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DIRTY OLD WOMAN (RISQUE!!)

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    DIRTY OLD WOMAN (RISQUE!!)

    A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.
    Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"
    "About 35," was the reply.
    "I'm actually 47," the man says happily.
    A little while later he goes to McDonald's for lunch and asks the order taker the same question, to which the reply is, "I'd guess that you're 29?"
    "Nope, I am actually 47." He's starting to feel really good about himself.
    While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question.
    She replies, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your penis for ten minutes I will be able to tell your exact age."
    As there was no one else around the man thought what the hell and let her slip her hand down his pants.
    Ten minutes later the old lady says, "OK, it's done. You are 47,"
    Stunned the man says, "That was brilliant! How did you do that?"
    The old lady replies, "I was behind you in McDonald's".
    sigpic
    Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
    awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

    #2
    DIRTY OLD WOMAN (RISQUE!!)

    Rubys, you are so.o.o.. bad. I just barely got the joke with the sheep read and this one popped up. Had a good laugh with the sheep joke but this one had me falling off my chair:H:H:H
    For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
    AF since 10/10/2015:yay:

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      #3
      DIRTY OLD WOMAN (RISQUE!!)

      Ruby, lmao. :H :H :H :H

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        #4
        DIRTY OLD WOMAN (RISQUE!!)

        :H:H lmao
        Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.

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          #5
          DIRTY OLD WOMAN (RISQUE!!)

          o ruby ruby ruby it is nc to get a laff hahahaha have a good day

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            #6
            DIRTY OLD WOMAN (RISQUE!!)

            lmao too funny
            :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
            best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

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