>
> (This is so funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier)
>
> I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down
> terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got
> the whole thing a-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to
> fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a
> military unit until you're at least 35.
>
> For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10
> seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving
> us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the
> enemy.
>
> Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier
> is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and
> hungry'. We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that
> desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a
> while.
>
> An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys
> always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said,
> 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up
> killing some fanatical s.o.b.
>
> If captured, we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we
> put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real
> brainteaser.
>
> Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed
> and yelled at, and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an
> appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years, as an excuse to
> get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.
>
> They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in
> combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the
> side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.
>
> Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never
> seen anyone outrun a bullet.
>
> An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to
> shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't
> figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the
> back of his head.
>
> These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little
> more about life before sending them off into harm's way.
>
> Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The
> last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off
> old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best
> years are already behind them.
>
> ***How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!! You think Men
> have attitudes!!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on
> border patrol...They will have it secured the first night!
>
Hubs could decimate a country's entire army in 24 hours if he doesn't have cornbread and collards, a locking bathroom door, and has a bad cold. YIKES!!
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