Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and
loved to charge
around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel
and getting up to
maximum speed on the long corridors.
Because the poor woman was one sandwich short of a
picnic, the other
residents tolerated her, and some of them actually
joined in.
One day Ethel was speeding up one corridor when a door
opened and Kooky
Clarence stepped out with his arm outstretched.
"STOP!," he shouted
in a firm voice. "Have you got a license for that
thing?"
Ethel fished around in her handbag and pulled out a
Kit Kat wrapper and
held it up to him. OK" he said, and away Ethel sped
down the hall.
As she took the corner near the TV lounge on one
wheel, Weird Harold
popped out in front of her and shouted "STOP! Have you
got proof of
insurance?"
Ethel dug into her handbag, pulled out a drink coaster
and held it up to
him. Harold nodded and said "Carry on, ma'am."
As Ethel neared the final corridor before the front
door, Crazy Craig
stepped out in front of her, stark naked, holding his
"you-know-
what" in his hand.
Oh, good grief," yelled Ethel, "Not the breathalyzer
test again!"
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