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    Dog Food Diet

    I was in WalMart buying a large bag of Purina dog chow and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog........

    Duh!

    I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

    Her eyes about bugged out of her head. I went on and on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it. I told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works is to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

    I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.

    Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was that why I ended up in the hospital. I said no.....I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt when a car hit me.

    I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.
    Sobriety Date: June 15, 2007 -- "It's not having what you want, It's wanting what you've got...."

    #2
    Dog Food Diet

    Love it!!!!!!

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      #3
      Dog Food Diet

      Bark...Bark...Bark...
      Control the Mind

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        #4
        Dog Food Diet

        LOL, that's the sort of thing that I would say, people are sooo gullible xx
        sigpicXXX

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          #5
          Dog Food Diet

          I'm glad I read thru these jokes before I cut & posted that one! Love it! Just got it a few min. ago from my boss!:goodjob: :H
          The only thing worth stealing is a kiss...:flower: zwink:

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            #6
            Dog Food Diet

            That is the funniest thing that I have heard in a very long time, Athlete!! If I had been there, I might have wet my pants I would have laughed so hard!!:H
            AF as of August 5th, 2012

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              #7
              Dog Food Diet

              I told everyone @ the cafe tonight the prime rib was "purina fed":H ..... and of course gave them a copy of this for an appetizer!
              The only thing worth stealing is a kiss...:flower: zwink:

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