Do you have a goldfish?

[betty boop]

Do you have a goldfish? Just answer yes or no, and then read below.

Two builders (Dave and Stuart) are seated either side of a table in a
rough pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a
stool at the bar. The two builders start to speculate about the

occupation of the suit...

Dave: - I reckon he's an accountant.

Stuart: - No way he?s a stockbroker.

Dave: - He ain't no stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn't come in here!

The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer gets
the better of Dave and he makes for the toilet. On entering the toilet
he sees that the suit is standing at a urinal. Curiosity and the several
beers get the better of the builder...

Dave: - Scuse me, no offence meant, but me and me mate were wondering
what you do for a living?

Suit: - No offence taken! I'm a Logical Scientist by profession!

Dave: - Oh! What's that then?

Suit: - I'll try to explain by example. Do you have a goldfish at home?

Dave: - Ermmm well yeah, I do as it happens!

Suit: - Well, it's logical to

follow that you keep it in a bowl or in a
pond. Which is it?

Dave: - It's in a pond!

Suit: - Well then it's reasonable to suppose that you have a large
garden then?

Dave: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden!

Suit: - Well then it's logical to assume that in this town if you have
alarge garden then you have a large house?

Dave: - As it happens I've got a five bedroom house, built it myself,

Suit: - Well given that you've built a five bedroom house it is
logical to assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and that
you are quite probably married?

Dave: - Yes I am married; I live with my wife and three children.

Suit: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually
active with your

wife on a regular basis?

Dave: - Yep! Four nights a week!

Suit: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you do not masturbate
very often?

Dave: - Me? Never

Suit: - Well there you are! That's logical science at work!

Dave: - How's that then?

Suit: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I've told you
about your sex life!

Dave: - I see! That's pretty impressive, thanks mate!

Both leave the toilet and Dave returns to his mate.

Stuart: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he does?

Dave: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!

Stuart: - What's that then?

Dave: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?

Stuart: - Nope

Dave: - Well then, you're a wanker

[hart]

Do you have a goldfish?

I like it but it's so long with MY goldfish memory I couldn't tell it......LOL

[Determinatrix]

Do you have a goldfish?

That reminds me of Home Improvement when Tim would seek advice from Wilson, the nice older neighbor man, who would explain women and marriage and it would make sense to Tim. But when he would explain it to his wife and he did it all wrong and made the original problem so much worse! LOL I loved that show.

[rachel28]

Do you have a goldfish?

lol like it, have good time at the zoo, i love helpin on the trips, ice skating was cool,! im gutted tho, i missed the visit ti the fire station i couldent get out a work, would a been my heaven !! have great time xx

[satori]

Do you have a goldfish?

So logically, if I buy a goldfish I get a big house and loads of sex?

Pet shop here I come!!!!!


Satori
xxx

[tawnyfrog]

Do you have a goldfish?

satori;158749 wrote: So logically, if I buy a goldfish I get a big house and loads of sex?


xxx

That's correct.

Signed: The Goldfish Vendor.

[Paddy]

Do you have a goldfish?

But then again, you the o get a suit, too.

AND, meet the one builder wth the house and the goldfish and the guy with no goldfish who's a wanker at my pub.

Signed: Your local pub owner (who's banned from this site and who shanghaied Paddy's loggin password)

[tawnyfrog]

Do you have a goldfish?

Ummmm .... sometimes I really don't understand stuff ....




Do gerbils count?

[satori]

Do you have a goldfish?

tawnyfrog;158753 wrote: That's correct.

Signed: The Goldfish Vendor.

Tawny ya bugger! :H

Never miss a trick, do you?

Satori

xxx

[satori]

Do you have a goldfish?

tawnyfrog;158759 wrote: Ummmm .... sometimes I really don't understand stuff ....

ER.... me neither!


Do gerbils count?

NO - I had one when I was 10 and I got NO sex at all!!!!

Satori
xxx

[irishlady]

Do you have a goldfish?

Tawny, don't be silly, of course gerbils don't count.. They can read though....

[tawnyfrog]

Do you have a goldfish?

... oh but how are they on Latin declensions? ...

[irishlady]

Do you have a goldfish?

I asked a gerbil that question and here is what he had to say,



The ending on first declension nouns is characterized by an "a." With many Latin adjectives, there are three forms, e.g., unus, una, unum (one). The one with the nominative in "a" -- una -- is feminine, as are most of the nouns in the first declension. However, there are also common first declension nouns that are masculine.


I didn't stay to hear the rest, but he's still gibbering away about it all.. I somehow get the feeling that no one has ever thought to ask him that question before...

[tawnyfrog]

Do you have a goldfish?

And that, precisely, is why I LOVE a good gerbil!

Sooooo much on his mind ....

[satori]

Do you have a goldfish?

Yes - but can he put up a shelf???

Satori
xxx