Hi all,
Yesturday was a lovely sunny day here which makes a change so I decided to go on a bike ride with my son and it turned out a disaster we were going along the canal far from home and my sons chain on his bike came off I put it back on with great difficulty as it was all twisted got my hands covered in oil, and then it happened again and again and again by this stage i was fuming I also needed to pee so i decided just a little further then we will come to a big super market and I could pee get lunch sit down and relax away my frustration so we did then we headed back home and of course the chain kept coming off I bumped into a couple of bikers along the canal who took there time out to take a look at the bike. They done something to it then we headed off again five minutes later the chain came off again my hands were covered in oil again and i was getting worked up I nearlly threw the bike in the canal i was shouting at the top of my voice at the bike and kicking it heheheheh ( i must of looked funny to anyone else having a girly fit) then a thought just popped into my head ( I NEED A DRINK) to calm down.
Then I just went into pissed off mode because what was supposed to be a mother and son day turned out to be terrible anyway we ended up walking back home pushing our bikes. I sat down and i was convincing myself to get a drink and I hated how just because something didnt go to plan I automatically thought of alcohol to make me feel better I didnt get a drink because I know that I would have felt 100 times worse than what I felt at the time. After several cups of teas and fags I picked up my book and read that until late then i went to bed and feel better this morning for not caving in.
But my point is Im so used of getting a drink when im angry with something that Ive got to change that. How else do I get rid of anger without turning to the drink ???? I know I read my book etc but what happens next time the situation of anger isnt with a bike but with a person I HATE ARGUING...........and in the past ive just walked away and drank the anger away.............Im 22days AF just about........
Anyway thanks for reading hope you are all happy and safe :h
Yesturday was a lovely sunny day here which makes a change so I decided to go on a bike ride with my son and it turned out a disaster we were going along the canal far from home and my sons chain on his bike came off I put it back on with great difficulty as it was all twisted got my hands covered in oil, and then it happened again and again and again by this stage i was fuming I also needed to pee so i decided just a little further then we will come to a big super market and I could pee get lunch sit down and relax away my frustration so we did then we headed back home and of course the chain kept coming off I bumped into a couple of bikers along the canal who took there time out to take a look at the bike. They done something to it then we headed off again five minutes later the chain came off again my hands were covered in oil again and i was getting worked up I nearlly threw the bike in the canal i was shouting at the top of my voice at the bike and kicking it heheheheh ( i must of looked funny to anyone else having a girly fit) then a thought just popped into my head ( I NEED A DRINK) to calm down.
Then I just went into pissed off mode because what was supposed to be a mother and son day turned out to be terrible anyway we ended up walking back home pushing our bikes. I sat down and i was convincing myself to get a drink and I hated how just because something didnt go to plan I automatically thought of alcohol to make me feel better I didnt get a drink because I know that I would have felt 100 times worse than what I felt at the time. After several cups of teas and fags I picked up my book and read that until late then i went to bed and feel better this morning for not caving in.
But my point is Im so used of getting a drink when im angry with something that Ive got to change that. How else do I get rid of anger without turning to the drink ???? I know I read my book etc but what happens next time the situation of anger isnt with a bike but with a person I HATE ARGUING...........and in the past ive just walked away and drank the anger away.............Im 22days AF just about........
Anyway thanks for reading hope you are all happy and safe :h
Comment