Not selfish at all
I definitely think you are not being selfish at all. Maybe for the first time in a long time you are discovering for yourself who you are and who your friends are. It's terribly painful and difficult sometimes, but how else can we grow??
As far as handling changes, I am still doing so, even after quite a long while. Remember they are all good changes. Think of yourself as running naked through the jungle with only yourself and your wisdom to guide you to survival. All this other crap like alcohol is not necessary. Think of the necessary things, concentrate on them, make them the very best that you can.
I don't know, sometimes it helps me to concentrate on what is most necessary first.
I wish you so much luck and happiness
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