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Am I an enabler??

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    #16
    Am I an enabler??

    Sounds to me like you have a handle on this. You need to take care of yourself, seems like you are doing a pretty good job already.
    bear
    What St. Frances of Assisi said of himself is true for me.
    ?If God can work through me He can work through anybody.?

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      #17
      Am I an enabler??

      you need to come back and read this when he shows back up.

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        #18
        Am I an enabler??

        Trix,

        I was concerned that Overdrinking Determinator was the person who was attracted to me when we dated and got married, and now that he is managing his drinking, would New & Improved Determinator still be attracted to me? Would he tap into all these new feelings and decide we were no longer a match? Would he outgrow me on his journey?

        I think Flip presented some important questions for you to think about.

        Wishing you Love, Laughter & Lust,
        Dx
        * * I love Determinator * *

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          #19
          Am I an enabler??

          mojomuppet;164828 wrote: you need to come back and read this when he shows back up.
          funny he did show up while I was reading your replies. he was wondering what was for dinner. I brushed my teeth and went to sleep.
          Now he is gone again.
          the positive thing is that am being really zen about this situation. I normally would be an emotional wreck, it woudl affect my performance at work, I would stop at the local dive and blab drunk about my personal problems, then I'd wake up with a hangover.
          I told him that if he didn't get a job and contribute in the next month, he should move in his boat. I am sticking to this. I've had enough!!!! no more being the mommy to a bad boy
          You can't turn a pickle into a cucumber

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            #20
            Am I an enabler??

            Flip;163875 wrote: Is this a person who you see youself with for the long term? I did, I even wanted babies with him. no I can't see myself supporting a man who sits around surfing craigslist and complaining.

            Does he help you be the best person you can be? he satisfies basic needs I am low maitenace. you'd think I would be appreciated instead of being taken advantage of.

            Are you happy with the way things are? I vacillate between being angry, frustrated and warm and fuzzy

            Does he respect you? (I think not!) nah he is incapable (not his fault)

            Geeze girlfriend, what do you think??? :-)
            RUN!
            You can't turn a pickle into a cucumber

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              #21
              Am I an enabler??

              Run, Run as fast as you can!

              grab life and live it !

              be the best you can be!!!

              don't let bad choices in the past hold you back!!!
              It always seems impossible until it's done....

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