Need a good swift kick

[Beaches]

Need a good swift kick

Happy get it together girl. I know what some of your struggles are because I live them on a daily basis and they kick my ass too. Accept what has come our way, encompass it , love it and make it better each day. Don't get stuck in the day to day things. If you do it will paralyze you, I know it would me. Think of what the future can bring us, not negatively but postively....DO THIS and LIVE.

THINK AUTISM THINK CURE

[karma7171]

Need a good swift kick

why no one beats you up

Well, I don't think that is what would work with you. No one here can beat you up more than you have beaten yourself up already.

You have my love, compassion and empathy.

Karma

[GinaCA]

Need a good swift kick

Whoa Patty! I have always thought of you as one of the strongest people here. I don't even know what to say, except I have met you....I found you to be an exceptionally kind and humanistic type of person...in person. The kind of person that tries to help others before herself. I wish you could see all those beautiful traits you possess and how YOU were meant to mother Sophie. You DO need to make an appt for a massage and get a babysitter for ONE simple day!! It'll do you wonders! She will be fine. She will reap the benefits of a mom who does take time to care for herself. That is an important lesson. Sending you a huge coast-coast hug!!:l g

[eustacia]

Need a good swift kick

Dear Patty,

I can sense the weight of the earth on your shoulders. You engaged in some pretty scary behavior and I have every reason to be concerned about you and you have every reason to be concerned about yourself. You are the mom of an autistic kid and I, for one, view parenting a child with autism as one of the hardest things life could deliver. That you love your child is beside the point.

You sound sick with exhaustion. You need a temporary break. I understand that your resources are low and it might take some imagination but I think that you need a few days to catch your breath. Patty, I am very concerned that you called the suicide hotline because that indicates that at least on some level you were fantasizing checking out.

However, having made that call and writing for help here indicate that you're not giving up on yourself. Please find yourself a good therapist NOW. Roberta probably has a list. If she doesn't, check Moderation Management's website for a referral. Even if you've had bad experiences with therapy, you need help NOW.

I realize that I am being directive and you know that that is not usual for me. I am worried about you. Don't be ashamed of what you did or said when you were drunk but get help NOW. Also, keep in mind that in NYC if someone calls 911 about a potentially suicidal person the distraught individual is taken away in handcuffs. Not a pretty picture.

PM me if you want.

I am concerned about you.

Eustacia

[karma7171]

Need a good swift kick

don't shut doors

Don't for any reason discount trying something that may help you. Just because you know people who went to AA and for whatever reason you have a bad impression (ok my posts don't help)...don't discount it. You may be short changing yourself. I feel free to post what I do do about AA because I acutally went there. But honestly, I only post the negative. There was alot of positive or else I would not have stayed so long. It just was not healthy for me in the long run, but in the short run it was. Some of the benefits still live with me today. Was I unhappy on how it ended and their short mindedness...yes. But I do have to be honest...there is one meeting that I literally went to just for the "Lord's Prayer" part. It was a huge meeting and just watching all of us scum bags (in the world's view of us) hold hands and pray had such an effect on me. I do not believe that ALL of our problems are spiritual...but I do know that reconnecting that part of my life was a huge part of my success. Church never did it for me the way AA did. But there is another option...check out Unity Church. I was first turned onto it by WFS...the founder spoke of it a lot. I located a small group near me that meets and it is great. Traditional it is not. But it is the type of teaching I want to expose my kids to. Long way around it...when we shut doors to something because we think that we "know"...we may be shutting one that opens up the light to us. There were some GREAT people I met in AA...one being my sponsor...and the reason for my conflict when it ended. In the end I had to be me and she had to be her...but neither of us are wrong.

Just do not shut doors that may open others for you...that is all I am saying. Had I not been in AA for 7 months ABS...I may not be me and where I am today. It is all a circle.

Karma

[IAD]

Need a good swift kick

Happycamper,
Sometimes I come across as graiceful as an elephant in a Crysitle Shop. But I quess I am what I am, A blue collar guy ! You can put me in a suit but ..... I'll look like a grave digger !
IAD

[trixietrack]

Need a good swift kick

happy My cousin has an autistic child. it's a very very difficult thing for the family.
you are bearing all of the pain involved.
it is not an easy task .

In terms of kicking your ass, you have already done it to yourself.
all I can offer is a good strong hug and a big pat on the back.

trix

[pansy]

Need a good swift kick

Ugggh - Camps!! I am just reading this and we did not talk yesterday - WHY YOU NOT CALL ME ??? I am needing to go to bed now - job interview in AM - but I promise to call you up and kick your ass after I am done.

I promise - it is written in my book a) call Camper and kick her ass b) check to see if Pope Duck's message got through, if not double kick Camper's ass in case Pope Duck is busy tomorrow.

Okay - it will get better. I am not gonna make you flush the Ambien, but you know what you gotta do there ... before you get a full-time job ... right?

Big hugs,
Pans

[magic]

Need a good swift kick

Patty

I am so worried about you.

I got my ass to detox.
I got my ass to a psychiatrist.
I got my ass to rehab.

It was damn hard. All of it. I'd do it all again in a heartbeat.

It saved my life.

The sun shines now when I open my eyes in the morning, even if it is raining.
It can for you, too.

Nancy xx :heart:

[Bluebell]

Need a good swift kick

Camper, just want to say hello and that I really do hope you can find enough strength in yourself to get the help that you need. You know that you would never choose to do what you did if you were sober but it seemed like a great idea whilst drunk. Therefore, while you still feel like crap, make an appointment to see your doctor. Don't wait until you feel better because the chances are, it will get brushed under the carpet.... again.

Who cares if anyone you know finds out? I'm sure they will find out anyway if you're found passed out somewhere. It's you and your family that matter... not anyone else.

Best of luck.

[Mackeral]

Need a good swift kick

Happy, i just woke up and read and i gotta go work now..I will respond and read properly tonight after work..And thanks for shouting at me yesterday...I will return the favour tonight xx

[happycamper68]

Need a good swift kick

Hi all just a quick thank you for now- I am at work today for my full day and we dumped the rest of the wine last night. Today is my day 1. I may not be on later, need to spend time with hubby. Thanks again and I will answer my PM's when I get a moment!

[sammys]

Need a good swift kick

Get on the drink tracker and so will I, you can not have a drink unless given permission by someone here first. How's that, for a butt kicking, which by the way I could use a good butt kicking to. I also agree that you do beat yourself up pretty bad when you do stuff like phone calling when drunk, so it is hard to kick your butt. I do not want to minimize what you are doing but a phone is alot safer than driving a car drunk although the embarassesment the next day is pretty hard on you emotionally. I totally agree its time to take ourselves off the roller coaster.

Sammys

[gabby]

Need a good swift kick

Wow Patty, I had no idea you were goin through all of this. I knew Sophie was autistic but I didn't know you were slippin so much. What a huge weight tho.

As a mom I know ya just wanna fix all the hurt of our children and make it go away. I can't imagine being in your shoes. Other then it causing an incredible amount of pain. Then throwin financial crap in there too. Oh my Gosh!

What I do know is bein under the influence of the drink only paralyzes you. It makes you worse off then Sophie bein autistic. Imagine Sophie then being who has to take care of you then. Oh no....that's not gonna work. Everything is sure to go to hell then.

I know you gotta feel powerless. But you aren't till you drink. Then Sophie is who is control. Scary thought. Yes look at her face, see her little heart and feel her fear then. And what she cannot express to you. You are who is all she has to provide her the stability for she needs and yet - she can sense that isn't there when you drink. So she feels the fear and she can't express that.

I don't know. I don't understand autism at all. But like all kids...Mommy's are their God. And they are smart enough to sense instability. And that on top of a disability I would think they don't not know....but instead they know more.

Yes, Callin the suicide hotline is a red flag.....but the fact that you hung up is too. You don't want to hurt yourself.

You want to be there for your daughter. But only part way simply isn't good enough. And I know it is the way you want it either. So use that desire that you have shown and simply put it to work. Before time gets away from you. You can do it Patty.....I know you can. Just set your mind to it.

Sophie needs all of you. Not just part of you. Fix it and......and do it now!

hugs, loves and a swift kick......

[Mackeral]

Need a good swift kick

OK Happy,i have just read through whats been going on...I dont want to kick your arse either...1 thing bugged me though..when you said you cant do AA..You can and should do ANYTHING...Anything it takes..I am learning that now...I didnt want to leave my family for detox...But i did it because i love them...and i should put them before me...Not just in this but in any form..
Dont be scared to say goodbye to drink..The thought of never again used to haunt me everyday..OR..Carry on drinking...be fine for a while..and then one day you do something you regret for the rest of your life..As you know the stunts only get worse and worse..I can hold my hand up to that to...You dont need a bollocking...You need to refocus...Decide what you want...Then go and get it..:l :l :l :l