want out

[SK8RGRL]

I dont know how to deal with any of this. i tried. tried so hard. did better than i have ever done. and then... drank. Its finally summer here in uk. I cant cope tho. everywhere i go there r pretty girls, half dressed. my BF looks, I feel invisible. he tries not to let me see, but i know he looks. he's younger than me. its bad enough when u same age but to be older than yr BF is just terrible. i ask him things an he admits he just tells me wot i want to hear. i try, try so hard its not worth it not worth it. I have no confidence. no confidence. i will regret postin this

[Chief]

want out

Hi Maxine, How old is your BF? All men look at pretty girls (especially half dressed ones) but if your BF is just blatant about it then he doesn't respect you or appreciate you. So if that's the case why is he your BF? Don't let him be a reason to drink. Just my opinion...Don

[happycamper68]

want out

Maxine how much older are you? I am 5 years older than my husband. Your bf should not be looking while you are around, or at least not make it so obvious, I mean all men look. They are men but most men look very quickly or have perfected it to some art form where their women don't notice. And then there are some men that just don't look while their women are around because they are happy with their woman and don't feel the need to look- but all men are different. I know I am rambling. But- I would be pissed if I caught my man looking.


Is your lack of self-confidence coming from him or from yourself? Does he compliment you- how's the bedroom situation? What is he telling you that you want to hear? Can you clarify that? Sorry to be so forward! If he isn't making you feel loved and is staring at other women in your face that's kinda crappy. Don't be embarrassed about posting this at all.

[magic]

want out

Hi Maxine

I know you tried really, really hard.

I know you'll try really, really hard again.

You have lots of friends here who think very highly of you and want you to be well.

My mother had a saying, as I'm sure many mothers did-

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."

magic xx :heart:

[Determinator]

want out

confidence is attractive Maxine...so work on you and don't worry about the endless stream of youngsters prancing around. reset. regroup. write down your plan, and be nice to yourself ok? we are our own biggest critics. our biggest obstace is usually our own impression of ourselves. Let yourself shine!

[Mags]

want out

You said you have been trying really hard and have better than you have ever done before. Then your bf acted like an immature idiot and it bummed you out and you drank. OK. Maybe you can't do anything about your boyfriend's stupid behavior, but you can control your own behavior. As Don said, don't let him be your excuse for drinking. You obviously need to know where you stand with him, but at the same time realize that your being a strong and wonderful (and sober) person does not depend on him. You did very well and will do very well again - and you did that YOURSELF. Have confidence in yourself. :h

[Chief]

want out

How are you doing Maxine?

[august]

want out

Maxine..make it about YOU..you are not what your BF says or thinks..you are you and wonderfully precious and unique..let him look all he wants and if it bothers you tell him and if he continues ...well....men do look at other woman i know this...love yourself and build your selfesteem girl!! forgive yourslelf of mistakes and get back on the horse..you are precious!!!! dont forget that...believe it!!!

[SK8RGRL]

want out

happycamper68;177812 wrote: Maxine how much older are you? I am 5 years older than my husband. Your bf should not be looking while you are around, or at least not make it so obvious, I mean all men look. They are men but most men look very quickly or have perfected it to some art form where their women don't notice. And then there are some men that just don't look while their women are around because they are happy with their woman and don't feel the need to look- but all men are different. I know I am rambling. But- I would be pissed if I caught my man looking.


Is your lack of self-confidence coming from him or from yourself? Does he compliment you- how's the bedroom situation? What is he telling you that you want to hear? Can you clarify that? Sorry to be so forward! If he isn't making you feel loved and is staring at other women in your face that's kinda crappy. Don't be embarrassed about posting this at all.

I am 8 yrs older, everyone says I look younger than him, but the booze is catchin up with me. He is not insensitive and tells me I am gorgeous all the time. I just refuse to believe it. I keep thinking that eventually he will want someone younger. He was 23 when I met him and I was 31. we now 33 an 41. his confidence has grown where as mine has gone. our sex life has always been fantastic but the last couple of weeks he hasnt wanted me. he has apologised and told me he loves me but he is stressed and tired. this just fuels my paranoia. he doesnt stare at other girls but just the fact that he looks upsets me. irrational i know. its just that young pretty girls are everywhere at the moment. I think I will have to move to iceland!! thankyou so much for your thoughtful response xx

[SK8RGRL]

want out

Do you know I really didnt want to come on here this morning because I was so embarrased about my post/thread. I thought you would all think I am stupid. I was nervous and thought I should delete what i'd typed. What a relief, you all really do care! Thankyou for all your responses. My BF is really a nice guy and living with me cant be easy. He does his best to reassure me and doesnt openly stare but I am so insecure and paranoid I notice every little thing. It doesnt help that he has cooled off with" things "overthe last couple of weeks, he always said if I cooled off in that department it would be cuz I have someone else, so maybe i thinkin the same. He blames stress and being tired. I need his support right now but its obviously a bad time for him. nevermind, roll on the winter

[Flip]

want out

Someone else said it, and they are 100% right - the only thing you can do is love and nurture yourself and the rest will follow. Confidence and high self esteem ARE sexy! They also help you stop drinking as you will like yourself a whole lot more and not want to abuse your body any more.

[Guest]

want out

Maxine.........pamper yourself and spend the money you would normally spend drinking on yourself , and you`ll feel like a million dollars........we should give ourselves as much of a helping hand to "be all we can be" as our budgets allow.

So saying, the most gorgeous woman soon loses the power of attraction if, as the others say , she lacks confidence and self-esteem. Identify all your good points, physical and of nature..........then you`ll see just how many great assets you already have to build on.

Once your bf sees you oozing confidence, he`ll be looking alright............to see who`s looking at YOU!!!

Now go on........knock `em dead!!!

Love,

Starlight Impress x

[SK8RGRL]

want out

gee starlight, u always say the right thing! I will try, but its so hard for me. I have tried everything re my insecurities. antidepresants, councilors, cognetive behavioral therapy. nothin ever worked.I got to thinkin that if this is never gonna go and this is how its gonna be for me then the only thing left for me is... out. I tried to do that last january but my BF called the paramedics and so Im still here. so for now i will keep going. thanx again starlight

[Mackeral]

want out

Maxine, when Mrs Macks catchs my eyes a wondering, a good slap on the back of the neck usually sorts me out...If you look closely you can still see the finger marks..
Seriously all men do it..not just your bf...I bet when some of the women on this site see a good looking bloke with their t-shirt off..they must have a quick look..

[SK8RGRL]

want out

Hi everyone. I am about to leave for work but just wanted to say a big thankyou for your support over a "wobbly" weekend. I am actually feeling quite bright and chirpy this morning. I am going to try to stay possitive and try to overcome the terrible insecurities i allow to dominate my life. I know drinking doesnt help so I am gonna try really hard to come straight home from work tonight and not stop at the off licence to buy wine. I gotta go now, but i will be back later:thanks: xxx