Psycologist

[Rocky]

I fired my Psyc. yesterday...I felt it was a waste of time and money.

On the last session I asked him what his assessment was of my situation, and he just repeated stuff I had told him. No questions, no insights etc. He rarely would look me in the eye

Now I need to decide if I really need to go to one...my main purpose was to get some guidance on my efexxor... to stop or increase... now back to square one.

Oh ...and I'm drinking too much again...must get back to abs...

[Guest]

Psycologist

I wish you well in working things out for yourself Rocky.

Am newly AF, but surprised to find I`m actually liking not drinking.

Starlight Impress x

[CAPRICORN1]

Psycologist

Hi Rocky. I can relate with your frustration finding a pschologist who you feel is actually listening to you and is truly concerned for your best interest. This has been my main source of frustration lately. As I too have been going through effexor withdrawl(without much psychiatrist support, another story) I have never in my whole life felt so alone in the way i am feeling and cannot find anyone except other people who have gone through this to be of help.

What I found that has and is helping me the most and is free is getting on here and other forums like this and reading. I have been reading about everything i have a concerns about and also taking every suggestion i can from it.

I think I had one ofthose appts when the doc just tells you something you told them, but in a different way. It is scary that you are putting your mental and physical health in their hands.

I'm sure there will be more experienced advice to come, Rocky, but liststen to your body, read about effexor, depression, book suggestions on the subjuct, cognitive therapy, vitamins and supplements, etc.

Don't beat yourself up either(cause that is what we do). It just makes us more anxious. This is a learning process also. It cannot be done perfectly the first time.

Cap

[Change]

Psycologist

I don't like modern-day psychologists either. I find they repeat everything back to you as well. Apparently it's so you understand your own problems and find your own solutions.

Yeah, right.

How about some empathy?

The only one i did find that i liked broke up with me because i don't think she could handle me (i think she found me intimidating).

The other one i had was really nice, but she kept bringing her personal values into it, but as soon as i tried to over-step the boundaries, she would pull all this 'professional' stuff on me. But, whatever.

I am going to come here, and confront my fears. I think that is the answer to a happier life.

[YoungAtHeart]

Psycologist

I'm sorry that this didn't work out for you, Rocky. What a disappointment.

If you have medication concerns, it might be better to see a good psychiatrist who specializes in psychotropic medications. That might mean going outside your insurance plan to get someone who will spend some good time with you (or asking around to see if there is someone good who takes your insurance).

Capricorn has a good suggestion to read up on Effexor withdrawal. There are some scarey stories on some of the forums, but they are not true for everyone, but it sure is better to know what is possible. It can be a difficult medication to get off of. Please stock up on the MWO supplements--they have really helped me. I'm not sure how much my antidepressant has helped me, but not drinking and the supplements have help a lot. (But it took about 7 weeks for me to start feeling better.....)

Wishing you nothing but the best, Rocky.

Hugs,:l
Kathy

[mac]

Psycologist

Rocky,
Don't post much but always apreciated your posts when you were on the forum frequently. You have and will do well I am sure, note your comments re Psychiatrist however have to say the drinking too much again comment caused me more concern (although realise the 2 may be linked).
Going through battle myself and have cut back a lot however I know you can get to a positive place again. Others will have more insightfull help no doubt.
mac

[paula]

Psycologist

Hi Rocky,
probably a good idea to get rid of your psychologist. I agree with Kathy re. speaking
to a psychiatrist, or even your doctor. Efexor is an antidepressant and in the UK it would
be unlikely that a psychologist would discuss or prescribe medication. I think it would be
a good idea to read up on the meds you are taking,dosing up down withdrawals etc.
Best of luck and hope you manage to get back into abs.
Paula.

[Bella]

Psycologist

Hi Rocky, I speak to a counseller. I think they are similar to psychologists? maybe less qualified. He does repeat back to me what I have just said and Its really annoying! Eg.."I'm feeling a bit miserable today" reply..."I can see you are feeling a bit sad today" I thought that's just what MY counseller was like but obviously they are all trained to do this. Very odd. Anyway, I find that when I talk to him, I know I'm not going to get any answers or solutions but it is a time and a place where I can really talk about things I am too afraid to talk about with other people close to me. He is an 'ear' who will give me the space I need. I often feel that life runs too fast for me. I can't keep up. No one has time. With my counseller...I/We have time. That can only do me good and it does.

I hope you find some answers Rocky....to your questions and concerns. I think that often WE have the answers already... hidden away in our heads somewhere. We just need encouragement and belief in ourselves to find those answers. all the very best to you.

Bella xxx

[beatle]

Psycologist

Rocky, sorry , I am a bit too rushed and tired to have read all the other replies carefully--- just read your post and then brushed through. Anyway, I've taken efexxor-- not good for me. Have also been told that mixing these SSRIs with alcohol makes them not work, so... are you doing that?

Another thing, psychologists believe they can fix you up with medical miracles-- that hardly ever works with anyone, though gosh I wish it did. Get back to abs again and wait a little while before you decide if you need something else. I am not against meds, but it all gets messed up in the alcohol thing-- no mixing. After a little while abs, maybe you will get some benefit from the SSRIs. I don't know. And I'm just in the trying stage myself.

[IAD]

Psycologist

Rocky,
I've gone to mental health people & any one else that would hear my story.....They can't tell us anything. We need to work this thing out ourselfs. The best Phyic job is on this web site ! Air your laundry here & wait for a reply ! I mean who are really the experts ? The ones that have gone through all the b------! They really know what it's all about ! Come to DR. Vinny we can help you ! IAD:H

[Flip]

Psycologist

Have to agree with IAD (twice in one day!) that you have to work things out for yourself - all the shrinks can do is listen and guide - they can't get inside our heads and really know what is going on in there. That said, I have a fabulous counsellor who listens and talks and suggests and best of all - cares about me as a person.
Maybe shop around a bit more and keep working on it yourself. I read everything I can get my hands on - from Drinking to depression, codependancy, love addticion, sexual problems, self esteem, drugs, intimacy, family relationships. They are all related, you just have to pull out what is relevant to you and find out how YOU tick. It is only once you've worked out what is really driving you that you can address it.

Staying sober sure helps Rocky, join us back in Abs ok?

[nancy]

Psycologist

I agree with Flip that it helps to read a lot.

And Young At Heart, who said a psychiatrist is more appropriate than a psychologist for medication issues.

I really really think that there is a better psychologist out there for you. what you describe is what i try to avoid like the plague. There are psychologists out there who will give you opinions and directions. And if they are insightful, it's much faster than if you were to work everything out for yourself.

sure there are things we can figure out for ourselves, but there are also a lot of things that benefit from outside expert advice. Having someone repeat everything that is said might be beneficial to some but for me it is of no use. For example, if you have a lot of negative self talk and you repeat it to a passive psychologist, they won't call you on all that, they will just reflect it and ask you why you feel that way. So you assume they think there is some merit in what you are saying. A good psychologist will challenge all your negative distortions and maybe flat out tell you they don't believe them (this was my experience). This was after a year and a half of crying my eyes out with a therapist who just sat there and listened. I started to heal and realize there was hope with the more active approach-- someone who was basically telling me I was wrong about myself. What a concept! In retrospect, I realize this active therapist was right, i just has such a negative point of view, due to depression.

I always screen people by asking if they will give me some direction and if they will share some of their opinions with me. What is the point of seeking out an expert if they don't share their insights about you with you, share all the experience they have gained over the years?Also, it's great to have someone who makes judgments about things if your sense of judgment is off, as mine was for a time during a period of depression.

keep trying but you might get tired of finding the right person, as i have in the past.
in that case, be your own shrink and read up on things, be compassionate and curious about yourself. cultivate confidantes in your life.

[gabby]

Psycologist

Thinkin about ya Rock.

hugs....