Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Suicide Attempt

Collapse
X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 2
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous 1 2 template Next
    #1

    Suicide Attempt

    I feel quite embaressed writing this post. I have never been (seriously) suicidal before but something cracked. I was doing really well, a whole 7 days sober, 5 days off the pot and decided I'd go and watch the rugby (sorry Scotland!!) at the pub. All was going well and then something went very wrong. I don't remember getting home but I'm sure my GF and I had a fight and she left. Recently she's been prescribed an anti - dep and sleeping pills (which she hides cos sometimes i take a few with booze for effect.) Unfortunately, I can find anything a person close to me hides ( i know how they think). I swallowed the entire box (+- 30 tabs). LUckily she came home and found me on the kitchen floor. The worst part was, she callled the ambulance and because she was emotional, she happened to use the word arse ("she's in the kitchen, move your arse"_to be specific.) They laughed at her and then drove away. We have a Jewish friend who is like a rock, and he organised one of their ambulances (FREE OF CHARGE) and they came immediately and pumped my stomach and took me to the public hospital (another beaut of good manners and sympathy -NOT)

    ANyway, bottom line, i'm alive and very happy to be so. It's been one of the most disturbing things I've ever done. My mom told me I should write about it and it would help. I thought if I shared it would be good.

    Strangely enough, a lot of good has come of this and i have realised how much my friends REALLY love and support me. I have been struggling to go to therapy for money reasons and they have offered to group together and pay for me .

    My father committed suicide and I always vowed I would never do it as long as my mother was alive.

    I thank God for my life and a chance to try again. For anyone who feels like it's the only way out, it isn't. Talk to your people, you would be amazed how much they're willing to help, if you'd only ask.

    Bless you all,

    PS I spelt suicide incorrectly and you can't edit the heading! I hate spelling incorrectly, spelling is one of my forte's
    Full is not nearly as heavy as empty, my love...
    Not nearly. -Fiona Apple-
    Tags: None
    #2
    Suicide Attempt

    thanks for sharing that Deilight.

    it sounds like it was a kneejerk drunk decision, considering you know the fallout to everyone around you would have been. does that read right?

    you know how precious life is (even yours lol), use the support your friends are offering and good luck.

    roxane

    Comment

      #3
      Suicide Attempt

      Deilight,

      I am so glad your attempt failed!! and even gladder that you realized how important you are -- to yourself, your mom and your friends.

      Sometimes we forget that we are not truly "islands," but part of so many people's lives. It sounds like you have wonderful friends who care. You are truly blessed.

      Take care of yourself.

      Love,
      Cindi
      AF April 9, 2016

      Comment

        #4
        Suicide Attempt

        Ironically, Roxanne I have been trying to keep you signature note in my head everytime I face something diffucult. I guess I forgot that too when I was drunk.

        ANother irony- my knee is fucking sore from falling down-from what I see, looks like I stepped in the cat's water bowl and then fell to the floor.

        Maybe explain what you mean by "the fallout to everyone around you". You mean my mom etc?
        Full is not nearly as heavy as empty, my love...
        Not nearly. -Fiona Apple-

        Comment

          #5
          Suicide Attempt

          Deilight, you should really go and see a doctor. Sorry love, but if you have this type of depression in your family and you are showing signs of this you should really go and see someone.

          I now have to hide my meds from my husband. Although not suicidal he likes to get high from whatever. He is slowly getting better after cutting out the pot and most of the booze(an abuser of both for 25+ years). BUT he found my Atavan last week and decided he would take them whenever to help him sleep. Now I have to count them on a daily basis to make sure he isn't taking them. He needs to get some help too, this I know.

          Please go and get some help. Your life is worth living.

          Comment

            #6
            Suicide Attempt

            Deilight, so glad that it didn't work!!!!!

            Have you thought about counselling? It really can help ...

            Love & Hugs, BB xx
            sigpicXXX

            Comment

              #7
              Suicide Attempt

              LIke I said in my post I am going for therapy very soon. I saw a psych at the hos but that was just protocol so they would let me leave. You have tsign a "I promise not to do it again letter" what bullshit!

              Anyway, I am very serious about going for therapy. It's more about finding the right therapist, someone who can actually talk to a lesbian without shiftng in their chair (which my hospital psych was doing-it's okay, I understand, but it doesn't help ME)
              Full is not nearly as heavy as empty, my love...
              Not nearly. -Fiona Apple-

              Comment

                #8
                Suicide Attempt

                You are right Deilight. It is very important to talk to people close to us about how we feel. But I do not feel able to do that. It feels like I am giving too much of myself. It is a big relief that your suicide attempt failed. It will make you feel better now the fact that you have shared your story. You are v brave. Good luck with the therapy. Bella xxx

                Comment

                  #9
                  Suicide Attempt

                  Deilight, I'm soo glad you are here... Sometimes things in life just get soo tough and cruddy just before the sun begins to shine and everything is fine in your world... I wish this for you... Take Good Care and Thank-You for sharing with us all. Hugs,

                  ~ I hear a whinny on the wind~

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Suicide Attempt

                    (((Deilight)))

                    I tried suicide a long time ago. Tried 4 times. It was in my late teens and early twenties. Took pills too. I also am glad it didn't work. Hon, ironically I know volunteer at a crisis line......quite good at it. If u feel like taking pills call me. My step-daughter is a lesbian and I luv her lots and lots. The shit she had kids with beat her and all sorts of things. The only thing he did is donate good looking sperm so I have great grand children. She married Jill in Canada and they are very happy. I would not squirm in my seat while talking to you. :l :l :l

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Suicide Attempt

                      Deilight, I'm also glad you failed at your attempt to take your own life. You are stronger than that and I'm glad you are going to talk to a therapist. I had 2 suicide attempts when I was younger as well. I often got depressed and sad and talked about scary thing when drinking excessively. Alcohol makes everything seem so worse and depresses you much more.

                      Why don't you go AF for a while. Your life depends on it and we are all here to encourage and support you.

                      :l
                      Marcie

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Suicide Attempt

                        Deilight;186416 wrote:
                        Maybe explain what you mean by "the fallout to everyone around you". You mean my mom etc?
                        just back online.

                        the effect that a successful suicide has on those around them. guilt, anger, confusion etc.
                        you said your dad was successful, i would imagine that was a very bad time for everyone around him.

                        roxane

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Suicide Attempt

                          You will be in my thoughts and prayers...your story should be a big wake up call to everyone..
                          Thanks for sharing you story...all the stories help to keep us in reality.....buckle

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Suicide Attempt

                            I tried suicide january last year. failed at that as well
                            Sometimes the only way to stay sane is to go a little crazy

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Suicide Attempt

                              sometimes its good to fail.

                              roxane

                              Comment

                              Previous 1 2 template Next
                              Working...
                              X