Don't Read This

[Change]

Don't Read This

I've just been thinking, maybe you're right about all this positive thinking stuff. I am going to try it the other way around.

[julie001]

Don't Read This

I agree with positive thinking, but not at the expense of pointing out negative comments (perhaps taken out of context) of other members. Other than that, your post was an excellent reminder of how often people in general, myself included, think in the negative. My most recent positive thinking mantra is "I'm happy today". One day at a time.

Julie

[n2itiv]

Don't Read This

Julie - I appreciate your feedback. I view MWO as an environment where we are here to help each other in a loving way.

Yes when the "don'ts, no's, and nots" are stripped away from the various comments I quoted, the comments (not the members) come across as extremely harsh. But that is my point exactly, as these negative words is the trash all of our subconciouses are digesting and fueling our lifes with daily. I want to be called on my warped thinking.

Breez pointing out my own "don't Believe everything doctors say", while not a readily apparent to most, brought up some highly sensitive stuff for me regarding sexual abuse. Personally I needed to hear it and thanked Breez offline.

Apologies to anyone who didn't appreciate my non tip-toe-thru-the-tulips approach. This is an odd environment where sensitivity needs to be balanced with honest feedback to ensure our emotional and physical growth.

xox

[imatree]

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I used positive thinking this morning with great results...

I had an unpleasant run-in with an ex-friend yesterday. Anytime I have a confrontation with anyone I become drenched with a feeling of being 'bad'. This comes from being a kid with an abusive alcoholic father and being in constant fear of being in trouble, of being 'bad'. And over the years confrontations with this "friend" of mine can put me in that space fast and deep. Last night I was in it bad. Even drank a bottle of wine to try to escape it. This morning I woke with it and it was worsened with the guilt of having drank.

So before even getting out of bed I repeated over and over in my head "I am good, I am good, I am good", and let myself feel myself as a good person (not the wretch she made me out to be, or I make myself out to be for drinking). And hours later I feel SO much better!!!

[Last Of The Summer Wine]

Don't Read This

Don't read this? I wish I hadn't! Just what I needed, thanks very much, yet again someone telling me I am wrong in my thinking and in my emotions. History yet again repeats itself. I do realise of course, n2itiv, that you are obviously a very intelligent and very knowledgable person, however I don't (didn't) need to be pulled up by your goodself in respect of what I perceived to be an upbeat and positive post. I won't bother in future, at this point in my life I should really know better. I also note that the comments were posted "with much love" - I just want you to know that your comments have not come across to me as "loving" or even as thoughtful - just critical and very unhelpful. Please do not respond this - I will not check anyway. Maybe you could just think a bit more before you share your pearls of wisdom.

[lucky 2.0]

Don't Read This

You can get a lot of great free podcasts @ itunes.com. Even if you do not have an ipod to download them to, you can listen through your computer speakers. I like mythoughtcoach.com. There is a 5 minute podcast on being a moderate eater which can also be applied to moderate drinker if needed.

We are more powerful than we even know if we harness the mind.

[CuteOldDude]

Don't Read This

n2itiv;188241 wrote: I?m trying to prove a point with my thread title that people (and the universe) don?t pay attention to words like ?Don?t?.

Breez has a great ?Positive Thinking? thread. Great concept, but Yikes there are too many of the following words:

- don?t
- never
- not
- no

Notice what happens when I take these words out of the replies:

Breez - Today I want to drink. Quit! It's my secret reminder to give up

Change - surround yourself with people or things that aren't healthy for you. lower your own standards.

Mags - I will drink today

Last of Summer Wine - more drinking, more negative thoughts, just going to be nicer to myself - full stop!

XTexan obviously has been working this whole positive thinking thangy:

1. Today I will be sober.
2. Today I will heal up.
3. Today I will get healthier.
4. Today I will learn more about myself.
5. Today I will become stronger.
6. Today I will do better for myself.
7. Today I will be better than ever.

Looking at what you don?t want is an excellent way to turn it around and figure out what you do want. Notice the difference below:

Breez, Mags and LoSW (and the rest of us) want healthy sobriety. ?Change? wants to surround herself with healthy people and things. In addition ?Change? wants to raise her standards. LoSW should be nice to herself ? full Throttle, full sail, full speed etc

Now let?s peel the onion back a little further.

1. I once had a client who wanted a mate who didn?t cheat on her. That got reworded to ?wanting a man who believed in monogamy?. I replied: ?my ex-husband ?believed? in monogamy, problem was he didn?t ?practice? it.?

2. Another example: saying ?I want to lose 50 pounds? can happen many ways ? cancer, losing a leg ? or ? proper diet and exercise.

Really pause and ask yourself ?So, what do I want??

What you say is SO true. There are two books that everyone here (and in the world!) should read that double underline everything you say: 'The Power of Positive Thinking' by Normal Vincent Peale, and 'What To Say When You Talk To Yourself' by Shad Helmstetter, both available from Amazon and others I'm sure.

It disturbes me that anyone might take offense by your words. It is well know that the subconscience is stupid, and absorbs whatever it is fed. Words like 'quit', 'don't', 'can't' make as much impression on the subconscience as positives like 'did, 'succeeded' and 'won', for example. Anyone who reads the two books I've mentioned above, especially 'What To Say When You Talk To Yourself' and follows the thoughts therein will be amazed at the almost instant changes in their lives. I read both of them, and I am... amazed.

You're right-on!

Dave