Suicide?

[wantrealmeaning]

Suicide?

Just as we do not get obsessed about trying to catch or follow real clouds - which we know is ultimately a futile ambition - we should try not to get caught up in and follow our thoughts either. Especially when these thoughts are unhelpful / destructive ones.

My own understanding of the Dali Lama's explanation of depression is more based on the above attitude to thoughts - seeing them as impermanent - rather than "attitude" in the sense that you can "snap out" of depression or "think yourself" out of depression.

thank you for the above explanation Satori


want
x

[nancy]

Suicide?

I think Satori's explanation is very good. I think Buddhism helps us not get too hung up on the thoughts we are having. As he wrote, they are like clouds, not fixed parts of our personality. It helps us let go of ego and that brings a lot of relief. You can let go of a lot of things by realizing everything is impermanent.

I have had depression for many years. Aside from taking medication an avoiding alcohol, which causes depression... the main thing that helps depression is learning to truly care for yourself. I think one can develop horrible patterns of treating oneself and this will be a barrier to healing, regardless of how many therapists you see or drugs you take. I guess these patterns sometimes develop in response to childhood abuse.

The book Feeling Good by David Burns helps you recognize negative self-talk but it takes ages to get out of those habits.

The funny thing about depression is that you keep seeking positive feedback from outside sources but it is never enough if you feel bad about yourself, if you feel bad inside. Alcohol is just another outside source but it will never be enough.

I hope you do feel better today Beatle.

[Lucy Van Pelt]

Suicide?

just reading up on the posts, and it gave me a thought...

I am not religious, but, along the lines of the Buddist philosophy...I just read a good book that you may like Beatle...It is called "Eat, Pray, Love", by...Gilbert (can't recall first name right now). It is the true story of a woman who worked though her own depression and her search for meaning... Really good book, and think you may relate to some of it, and find some of it helpful. Also, it is something to DO rather than wallow (or drink). Just a suggestion.

I think Oprah just had the author on her show recently. Anyway, I hope you are in a bit better frame of mind today. We are all in this with you. You are NOT alone.

with love,

Beth

[Guest]

Suicide?

I think the depression is all tied in with this journey, beatle........it`s all part and parcel.
Sure.........I was depressed before I ever drank, which of course, led me to drink, which only served to intensify the depression.
However, having quit the booze, I`m finding that it ain`t no picnic..........I remain depressed for much of the time........can be feeling good about myself for a coupla days, then scud!!!!.......I`m that heap on the floor. One minute I am like Boadicea, the next I`m an emotional wreck.

So, quitting drinking doesn`t miraculously glue all our shattered pieces back together, but it does afford us a clear head to look at the root causes of our depression and allow us to try to address those causes. Where depression is concerned, even the tiniest changes in our lives can make considerable improvements to both how we feel and how we cope.

The only way out of the black hole of depression is to keep chipping away at it.

Starlight Impress x

[beatle]

Suicide?

Thank you all for such good advice again. I've been thinking about clouds (when I can think at all)

-- that is one thing where I have a problem relating. People here often talk about avoiding boredom. But I don't have that in my life at all. In fact, I am consciously taking time away from things I should be doing, just to be here -- don't get me wrong-- it is WORTH EVERY SECOND-- but I am never ever bored. In addition to working and being a mother and wife, I have many hobbies and I read a lot. So where the hell do I get time to get depressed? or drunk for that matter? It is confusing to me.

Anyway, I will definitely look into those books you all have advised.

Now to make supper for 5 hungry mouths.

[beatle]

Suicide?

Thanks Starlight. I'm on my way to chipping-

[bootcampbarbie]

Suicide?

ah beatle just checking in before the day gets to crazy. glad to see at least a glimmer of peace and hope. you know i found such wisdom for me in david hawkins work especially his first book power versus force. it isn't religious work at all so look him up sometime i think you will be quite amazed about what the vibational pull of emotions and thoughts are since they are not real but appear to be quite real all the same. and they really do have a hook on us all the same. well know that i'm just a good cel phone away. bootsie and well a billion miles lol

[lorisunshine]

Suicide?

Need to share this with you!

Dear Beatle.
I just saw this thread and feel that I must share something with you, that I have never told anyone ? not even my husband.
When I was 15 years old I tried to commit suicide, but my time to die had not yet come and they pumped my stomach at the hospital and saved my life. I never received any treatment for depression, as it was all hushed up and kept quiet. That was 46 years ago.

It they had failed I would never have learned just how many gifts had been or were about to be bestowed on me.
I learned throughout the life that followed that I had boundless energy, artistic talent, a gift for laughter, an almost insatiable hunger for adventure and travel and a generally positive attitude.
I approached every day with my hands on my hips saying: ?just bring it on?.
I met the love of my life.
I moved to a new continent.
I experienced the triumphs and failures of varying careers.
I gave birth to a most beautiful girl and found myself to adore motherhood.
I got everything I had ever dreamed of and then some.
I burned the candle at both ends and loved every minute of it.

Not any of that would have happened if they had been too late then and every life that I have touched since, would have taken a different course. To look at one?s life in this perspective makes each and everyone of us profoundly unique and precious. It is the only life that we will ever have.
Beatle, sweetie, love yourself first and foremost because you are so special. There is only one of you and that in itself is a miracle of cosmic proportions.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Love Lori.

P.S. After such a great start isn?t it sad that I became a drunk, but I am working on that one.

[bootcampbarbie]

Suicide?

ah lori that is truly the most beautiful post i believe i have ever read. i think i'll print it. wow, so much true heart and sincerity in every single word. no i'm sure it is no mistake you are having a word or two with alcohol as that when you complete with that you will have another thing of two to say about the blessings you've earned and learned. god what a magical creature you are. sincerely. you are truly such a gift to those that are lucky enough to have you in their life. sniff sniff thank you for sharing that so eloquently spoken. obviously you aren't on 225 of topa as i am. lol that was really touching.

[Saint Jude]

Suicide?

Beatle,
I'm so glad to see you're feeling better today.:l

I'm not a very religous person either,... but I do believe in some sort of power or life force, that blesses our lives.

I'm living proof of it. I didn't plan to be here today. About 12 yrs ago, I cut both of my wrists. I cut 3 tendons & 80% of the nerve in my right hand. After hiking all over the mountain all day bleeding,...but not enough. I decided to jump in the river & drown myself. That didn't work either. I decided, @ that point, I'd given it my best effort, and went to a friends & called for help.
I'll never forget when I told my Mom what I'd done, she asked me how I thought she'd have felt.:upset: I can't imagine the pain I wouldv'e caused my Family had I succeeded.
Thank God/(Dog)...I had a great surgeon, he fixed my hand. But only after I promised I wouldn't be wasting his time by doing something like that again. (I had a diff DR tell me I'd never use it again.)
I'd just been left pregnant by the "love of my life"...(so I thought), in a foreign country,then had a misscariage, maybe a bit depressed & chemically OFF.... but still...
I definately had someone looking out for me.:h

We are blessed in so many ways. Just sometimes our vision gets cloudy.
:l

PS I have since met the Love of my Life! Gotten married, buying a home, working on this alcohol demon together...life is pretty darn good, most of the time... it does have it's moments. But that's just part of it.
Tallyho!
Big Hugs...

[Saint Jude]

Suicide?

Glad you're here too Lori!
nice post...:l

[Guest]

Suicide?

Am so glad we`re all here for each other. Sure, sometimes it might be like the blind leading the blind, but isn`t it just wonderful to be able to care for others here and to be cared for.......

Starlight Impress x

[Newyear]

Suicide?

It is indeed Star
Lori and St Jude- happy you are here - as are the people in your life I'm sure
Beatle - hope you are feeling better

[Chief]

Suicide?

I'm so glad you are feeling better today Beatle.

[Finding My Self]

Suicide?

This thread is so powerful - we are all so together. Beatle, don't you dare do it again (!) but see how you've pulled us even closer together? No more feeling you don't have a right to life, please!

While we're at it...I've been there too...when I 'lost' my daughter via my parents...that long story... only a 'cry for help OD' but was it....? 25 years ago. Not good memories. My parents don't know. Or my children.

Beatle - I so hope you're feeling better tonight. My sort of prayer (thought) will be heading yoru way very shortly...

Love FMF xx