Battling the demons

[hippie37]

No! this is not a reference to computer games!

Although I may come across in my posts as positive and humorous concerning my drinking I still, like everyone on here, am learning to deal and cope with the demons inside that insist on me going to the pub! The change of lifestyle for me has a been a big one, as you will know having read my introduction, and I am still in the early stages of adapting myself to that.

Today is one of those days for me where I find myself alone for the week-end without a care in the world. This week-end is all about me and I cannot seem to get the idea out of my head of going to the pub for a drink and a chat about life and shit! and all the feelings of being free and able to do what I want to do without any interference from anyone is really getting to me. I'm not down or depressed or anything like that. I just really feel like 'partying' a bit even though I know what the consequences will be tomorrow. My brain is literally doing my head in!. It's really sunny outside as well which is adding to the attraction of getting out. I know I've got a real battle on my hands today! The psychological craving for that bachelor lifestyle I had in London is all to creeping up on me. and It's the first time I've been single in over 12 years!!!!LOL. I know I have the willpower to get over this as it is not the first time and I am learning fast about what triggers me but the demons are strong today. May the force be with me LOL

Love and Happiness
Hippie
xx

[Guest]

Battling the demons

Hi hippie,
I`ll be 3 mths. sober tomorrow and I swear to God..........I`d happily die before I`ll give in. Recharge the warrior in you!!!

Starlight Impress x

[Newyear]

Battling the demons

Hi Hippie...sorry it is a tough one for you today. Sometimes matras can help - focus on why you are doing this. Try to think of the negatives of a day or night out drinking and don't picture yourself laughing it up with a glass in your hand. Think of the reality of it. Think of how you will feel tomorrow- imagine the headache and the spinning feeling you get when you bend over the next day to put on your shoes.
Think of yourself tomorrow waking up feeling decent and not hung over.
Don't glamourize it. It doesn't make you fun - you are already fun( I know that about you already!) Concentrate on tomorrow and make a plan for today. Since you are not going to go to the pub...what are you going to do today? Do you like movies? Some kind of outdoor activity? Books? Spend a day in the bookstore. Buy something for yourself - the amout you would have spent in the bar. Do something- but don't go out drinking today.
You can spend the day here if you like
:l
Lisa

[cowgal]

Battling the demons

hang in there!

Weekends sober had always been tough for me too, all the time we wasted (not to mention $$$) on drinking, we have to fill the void...............be nice to yourself and treat yourself to something healthy, or walk or like someone else said, movie!!! I LOVE to go to movies, and with the weather being all sunny I love to go outside and walk too.................

Wishing you a peaceful and beautiful Sober Saturday Hippie!!!:h :l

MA

[wonderworld]

Battling the demons

"My brain is literally doing my head in!" - right there with you Hippie! thud. thud. thud. the sound of head banging wall. I'm thinking some exercise could help today. Get out of my head. Tire myself out. Get the endorphins flowing......

DEMONS BE GONE!!!! I COMMAND YE!!!

XX Beth

[hippie37]

Battling the demons

As a classically trained pianist I have always had a love of music since the tender age of 4 when I tried to play 3 blind mice on my Nan's piano. My parents saw both potential and enthusiasm from me, even at such an early age, and it was something to be encouraged. A few years later I was enrolled in piano lessons and continued to thrive taking all my theory and practical exams up to Grade8 at the Bluecoat Chambers in Liverpool.

Music to me has been in the past my profession, my lifeline, my downfall, my escape, and much more; and still is today my main therapy for relaxation. Music is itself a universal language that can break down barriers for me and also heal and nurture ideas and thoughts. It can also be my worst nightmare inflicting pain and sadness especially during moods of melancholy.

Music will get me through the day today I think guys Just listening to Cafe del Mar and e-mailing friends I've forgotten to e-mail in weeks so got a lot of catching up to do. Did the 3 s's before so feeling a bit more relaxed and mellow and less agitated about going out. Plus I have just been reminded about my access rights to my daughter which I would most certainly put under jeopardy if my ex ever got to find out about it!! Thanks for listening guys!!

Love and Happiness
Hippie
xx

[Saint Jude]

Battling the demons

Hippie, sorry to hear ya got the blues...
Maybe a walk out in the sun will help. Rollerblading?
Oh hey! You could always check around to see if there's any openings for your "desired profession" (# 8 on the questionare?):H

Whatever ya end up doing.. enjoy it. I'm sure you will.
:l Judie

[Guest]

Battling the demons

I HATE days like you are having. I still have them and I have been sobber for 6 months. I recently asked a long-timer is it ever going to go away??? She said her days are very few and far between. So, with that being said....surpress the demon however you feel you need to. As you know what triggers you now you also know this will pass.

Ride out the wave....you get the same sense of accomplishment and thrill tomorrow when you wake-up hang-over FREE!!!!!!!!!

[bloggy]

Battling the demons

Hippie

Hope you managed to ride it out.


Congrats on what you have already achieved

[Phoenix74]

Battling the demons

Hi Hippie

I was reading the 'inspirational song' thread and saw your post on Glastonbury Song yay
It, and A Girl Called Johnny, and She Is So Beautiful are my three WBoys/MS favourites.

I'd say you like some of Thin Lizzy too no? I'm a bit weird though; I go from there to Joe Satriani, to Ocean Colour Scene to Billy Joel...I'm a bit all over the place. Loving spanish guitar stuff at the moment. And Stevie Nicks, and Neil Young.
Love talking about music, love hearing new music, music is so important.

I've only just seen this thread now tonight, so I'm wondering how you got on with the demons? Hope all went well.

PS I presume the three sss are a shower a shave and a.......nother shower? :H

[free bird]

Battling the demons

Hard to keep the demons at Bay. Hope you did it.

[hippie37]

Battling the demons

Thanks one and all!

I find it's more the lifestyle change that effects me most especially when I get into a sentimental or reminiscent kind of mood. Which, I have to say, I've being do a lot of recently, especially after my split from my partner 2 months ago (no regrets there though). I do miss the old days when I could just jump in the car with a group of friends and head of to the country followed by a few pints in the country pub. Or grabbing a few cans and getting on my bike and cycling along the sea front. It's trying to disassociate the drink from these things I used to do and feel comfortable and happy in doing so again. As mentioned in the 'Drinking or thinking problem' thread, I have a thinking problem and I know for a fact I wasn't going to drink yesterday, the problem was purely exorcising some demons concerning my lifestyle change which were probably brought about by reminiscing and forgetting to live in the here and now!!

Thanks again to everyone who posted in this thread.:l
Love and Happiness to you all
Hippie
xx

[betty boop]

Battling the demons

Hi Hippie, only just noticed this, :goodjob: on keeping those demons at bay ..........

Stick around here when you are tempted, we will help you ......

I know that you've already found our undercover dating thread here but there are others here too if you look hard enough ......

It might be worth subscribing too, you get free Kudzu which is excellent for cravings and the subscribers forum is pretty racy ..... lots of fun .....

BB xx