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    Why Now ??

    Day 3 Af for me, after 2 month binge. (following 8 months AF)
    Husband said to me today why bother stopping now, what with Christmas coming up. Why not wait until after the New Year.
    My thought process went a bit like this
    1. from now to end December 72 days
    2. Imagine 8 drinks a day = 576 drinks (about the minimum I have been having)
    12 drinks a day = 864 (about the max)
    Try to imagine all those drinks lined up - the sheer unbelievable volumn of it all.
    All those wasted hours & money
    All those calories
    All that lost time when I could have been doing something useful.
    All those nights I won't remember
    Yet I'm still thinking about it "why now"
    Anyone else having this conversation with themself??
    Am I nuts?
    Changeling

    #2
    Why Now ??

    Changeling,
    NOPE. You're definetly not nuts! Your Hubby might be,.. for asking you a question like that...
    Then again, maybe he's going for the reverse psychology effect...

    I say whatever you can do, whatever steps you take, in the way of self-improvement... are steps that are yours to have & keep with you.. no matter what. There are no gaurentees about tomorrow. So why not start today?
    Wishing you well. :h We're here for you. Good to see you.
    :l Judie
    The only thing worth stealing is a kiss...:flower: zwink:

    Comment


      #3
      Why Now ??

      When you put it in those terms the answer seem so simple, doesn't it? The amount of money I have spent on wine makes me sick. You don't have it easy with your husband encouraging you to drink. I think that is why you are thinking, "why now?" But you did 8 months before with him around. Get that resolve back!!
      I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me

      Comment


        #4
        Why Now ??

        hi Changeling,

        I just imagined all those drinks lined up like you said and wow! What a picture i just conjured up as well as all the Christmas Parties I would be going to. Having a few drinks before going and thinking inwardly I was hiding it all well and then the embarassment of hearing the words "wow, you were pretty drunk at the party" after the event.

        Well, it made me rethink my day's.

        Thanks for posting,
        mike

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          #5
          Why Now ??

          Changeling: Why not now, really? I'm at six and a half months right now and your revelation that you went back on the sauce after eight months scares the heck out of me. I hope I never forget the shaking hands and all the rest and just how awful the first few weeks of getting sober were. As you know, the reasons for putting off stopping are endless. For me, in the beginnig of my drinking there were plenty of fun times drinking with my wife, as I got older I think I was trying to re-live those fun times in a now much more stressful life. It never worked. I think if you drink enough for long enough you cross a line somewhere and drinking can never be fun again, you are chasing an illusion.
          Regarding the holidays, for the last five or so Christmas eves I would wind up outside smoking after numerous bottles of wine and long after my wife had gone to bed, I would look up into the stars and ask for help and resolve this would be my last Christmas morning hungover. Of course it never happened. This Christmas I hope to be half way thru my eigth month. I have been feeling great lately, loving life without alcohol and thankfully not missing it all. Your revelation has really made me appreciate where I am right now and reinforce my commitment never to go back.
          Only you can decide if you want to quit or mod and when but I can tell you, and you must remember, things are pretty good on the AF side of the fence.

          Best wishes for you.

          Comment


            #6
            Why Now ??

            inspiration

            Changeling, your simple arithmetic is amazing and has certainly made me think.

            Barry, what an inspirational story! Perfect for guys like me starting out (again) and who are in need of a little bit of practical advice.

            Thank you,

            Raoul

            Comment


              #7
              Why Now ??

              Changeling,
              The answer to your question is very simple, as in "there`s no time like the present".
              You`ve just listed a wealth of reasons for you not drinking, so why not quit now?

              In terms of drinking, Christmas and New Year are merely days much the same as any other, so whyever not now?
              Am looking forward to enjoying the true spirit of Christmas this year.........I no longer see how having a drink could enhance the time of year in any way.

              Hogmanay/New Year`s Eve is especially "big" here in Scotland........off-sales are queued out from early afternoon with everyone queuing up to stock up on their "carry out" of booze. Scots all celebrate "the Bells" on the stroke of midnight and drink like it`s going out of fashion on that night........I will still celebrate "the Bells".........it`s a poignant time of year........ letting go of the past and looking forward to the future.........am happy to toast it with juice this year though.........I`ll be almost 6 mths. sober by then and just know that 2008 is going to be my best year yet, thanks to my sobriety.

              Starlight Impress x

              Comment


                #8
                Why Now ??

                Changling, thanks for this thread. To visualise all that drinks lined up....counting wasted hours (our lives) along with money, calories and memories, very thought provoking.

                Barry: If you drink enough for long enough you cross a line somewhere and drinking can never be fun again..... I am going to type that out, print it and keep it in my purse. Drinking is no longer and has not been for quite a while 'fun' anymore for me, it has become a danger for me and turning me into a kind of human I do not want to be and will not let myself be (with the grace of God and this amazing site).

                Star, what can I say oh wise one.... THANK YOU... work and social life talk is all about the big christmas nights out just now and as I have not put my name down to attend any all I seem to hear is 'oooch why not, why aren't you going, you have to, you have to, it's only once a year' and variations of that, if only they knew that their once a year bash would lead to such a lot more for me.... Anyway, I am also thinking about Hogmanay, my fav time of year, and seem to have this strange longing feeling so much so that I am actually dreading it now just in case. I hope to meet you here at or just after the Bells, delicious fruit cocktaily thingy in hand, I would toast my thanks to 2007 for introducing me to MWO and toast our new lives to come in 2008.

                Lxx
                Rather die standing, than live on my knees, begging Please..... No More.......

                Comment


                  #9
                  Why Now ??

                  Barry you are a wise man full of great insight. And I appreciate it so much. Thank you.
                  I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Why Now ??

                    Lorna........see you here at "the Bells"!!! :l

                    Starlight Impress x

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Why Now ??

                      I think you answered your own question...why not now....BECAUSE 864 drinks is one HELL OF ALOT of TRASH in your body. You will throw-up, have headaches, shake, sweat, sleep will be horrendous. Your eating habits get out of whack. Not to mention you will miss Thanksgiving and Christmas with your family because you will probably be drunk. So why not now???? I say WHY would you keep going???? You had 8 GREAT months under your belt...get those back. You have already started, by the holidays you will be feeling GREAT!!! And looking great.......so why not now???

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Why Now ??

                        Changeling,

                        What a great post!

                        You said," My thought process went a bit like this..."

                        How many times have we all had that exact conversation? " Why bother stopping now..."

                        " the Holidays are coming up"
                        " there's a party I want to attend..."
                        " I'll quit after my birthday..."
                        " there's a big game on this weekend..."
                        " I have guest's coming in..."
                        " It's Friday, I'll quit Monday.."
                        " It's Monday, I'll quit Wednesday..."


                        The fact of the matter is: this IS NOT your thought process..

                        This IS The Beast.


                        Don

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                          #13
                          Why Now ??

                          Hi changeling, i know exactly where you are coming from, i am always saying i cant quit now its nearly the weekend or my birthday is coming up or as you say christmas, the reality is that would would probably enjoy all of the above much better if we were sober! your post has definately reinforced my descision to quit tonight though, all those drinks and headaches....yuck!
                          Don't put off til tomorrow what you can do today, if you do it today and like it, you can do it again tomorrow!

                          xEmx

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Why Now ??

                            Barry: Thank you for the rational and very insightful post.
                            September 23, 2011

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Why Now ??

                              Changeling,

                              Does your husband drink heavily too? Maybe he doesn't want to lose his drinking"buddy" or worse yet, see you succeed and have to face his own painful situation. Just a thought.

                              I wish you the best of luck and strength!

                              ggirl

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