I'm Struggling .....

[Flip]

I'm Struggling .....

Would you like me to organise to have you banned unless you shape up?

[sweetpea]

I'm Struggling .....

:h Betty

Take heart, you owe it to yourself to try and lick this. See if you can encourage your husband not to drink in front of you.

I am doing my first AF starting Nov 5th (see FIREWORKS THREAD) because I reakon if I don't slow down now I stand even less chance during the Xmas party season

Anyway I will be routing for you.

:l Sweetpea :l xx

[mintytess]

I'm Struggling .....

Thinking of you BB.

Can't say much to help cos I'm in the same place as you are I reckon.

Love to you....let us know how it goes...

Minty xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[happydog]

I'm Struggling .....

Hi bb
I wish i could help you, to say the right words. (Trying to stop myself.) But i do wish you lots of strength, you know you can get back on track.
Stay strong.
Love Teardrop.x

[Guest]

I'm Struggling .....

BB, you`ll be fine.........don`t worry. You did it before and you will do it again. Yes, like the others say, I think a wee stretch of abs is called for to get you back on track........and make sure you tell hubby that you need his full support on this.........keep wine out of the house for now!!! Rooting for you.

Much love,

Starlight Impress x

[slightlysuze]

I'm Struggling .....

Oh Betty....you sound so disappointed.....totally understandable.....:l

From my (limited) experience I would think that a bit of abs would set you up to get back on track...we all know how hard it is to stop at just one or two glasses. I find it impossible and that's why I need to be AF.

Why not join one of the 30 day threads and clear your head?

I know these blips are dispiriting.....chin up, gal....you CAN get back on track. :h

Suze x

[The Londoner]

I'm Struggling .....

BB
Yesterday I bought 2 bottles of wine. Half a bottle of Chablis for my husband which he drank last night. The other is a bottle of Organic Fairtrade still residing in my fridge. Its very white and very chilled and will be drunk by my friend over the weekend when she comes to stay.
Why am I telling you this? It is the first time I have been able to see wine in the house since I became AF 68 days ago. My husband has had a drink daily during this time but he did not drink in front of me at home until last night. I agree with Sweet Pea (love that name!). But I'd say ask your husband not to drink when you are around. I simply could not have had people around me at home drinking socially until now. Funny enough I've been to drinks parties after 30 days AF and that was manageable.

Can you go out in the evenings for a while, do something like go to a movie, pick something you have never done before, go do it! Visit non drinking friends. Being at home is just too damn cosy this time of year! I'm learning Italian, pity the teachers! Seriously, meeting new people through this has been fantastic-they only know the new me and that gives me such confidence-no guilt trips! And its sober fun! Instead of being aware of drinkers "having a good time", I notice loads of people in the coffee bars in the evenings really enjoying their conversations.
BB I realise you have a v difficult time because of your daughter and I think you have been so strong for her and having a drink can seem like the only "me" time. Please look into other relaxing options, just for you-load up on aromatherapy bath and massage oils. Its the perfect month for hibernating with a stash of good books, just make sure you hold the book in both hands, so there isn'e a hand free to hold a glass

Maybe get yourself and that hubby of yours on an evening massage course Buy a massage book?

I was a bottle of wine a day girl and saw this becoming a bottle and a half. I used to stare at the bottles in disbelief in the mornings, before rushing out to buy replacements so that it would be nicely chilled for 6 pm. I stopped because of a health scare-otherwise I would still be a fully paid up member of the White Wine Bottle Club. MWO really helps, we all know this, we all care for each other. BB-You can do 30 AF. November is a bit of a non month. Do it day by day and you will start to feel great again very quickly. You know this! After you read this, please sit down, , remind yourself how much you deserve this AF time, organise yourself,do whatever you have to to make this happen! We are all right behind you, cheering you on!
love from
Anna:h

[satori]

I'm Struggling .....

C'mon Betty - this is not like you!

It feels wrong for me to be giving YOU advice - coz it was YOU that helped me most when I first arrived.

BUT - I would say - try 30 days abs.

I started doing it just to see if I could - and now I realise it is SOOOOO much easier to go abs than it is to moderate.
I fouund that although I was drinking much less while moderating - I was still struggling with the Will I/Wont I /When / How Much stuff.
It was as emotionally exhausting as when I was drinking full tilt!

I now LOVE being totally AF - it seems scary to contemplate it - but it is NOT scary - it really is FREEDOM! I feel GREAT!
I don't think I will be drinking again any time soon!

Give it a try - at least after 30 days you will be able to decide rationally if Mods or Abs works best for you.

TBH - SWMBO still drinks - as do all my friends - but it no longer bothers me to be around them while they are drinking - they just know I dont drink alcohol any more.
So even your hubby drinking doesn't need to be a problem.

Big Hugs :l

Lots of love

Satori
xxx

[Cinders]

I'm Struggling .....

P,

:l

:h
Cindi

[Bella]

I'm Struggling .....

Hi Betty, Its funny how we get an idea in our heads and it stays. I have this picture of you as a very strong, controlled person who has cracked this alcohol abuse thing. So it surprises me to hear that you are struggling! All I can say is......you have done it before.....you can do it again. Its easy to slip back to old ways and takes alot to change again. Take the bull by the horns and use that inner strength you know you have to cut down. Your husband might be drinking more but you concentrate on you now. I admire anyone who can cut down and moderate their intake...I just can't do that. Sometimes its easier to just stop for a few days to get back into that pattern of control.

All the very best to you B.

Bella xxx

[betty boop]

I'm Struggling .....

WOW WOW WOW

Thanks so much everyone ............

I'm in a really difficult place at the minute, This time last year I was drinking far more than I am now, I was secretly drinking all day most days ......... I felt that I needed to drink ........ the thought of not being able to drink terrified me ....

Now I don't feel that I HAVE to have it, but I enjoy it ............if we are going out I will drive and that doesn't bother me ......... but it has gradually increased over the past few weeks, last night I came home from work and hubby was on his second glass and had one poured for me already .....

You are all definitely right, I need to do an AF spell ..... cant promise I will start over the weekend but will do it monday ........ even if I only do monday to friday then it is a start ...........

Thank you all so very much .........

Love you all ...........

[ducky]

I'm Struggling .....

BB, I just saw this thread and wanted to pop in. I am glad you are feeling better. I have also been breaking my mods rules a bit recently but am trying to get back on track. I am sure that you will too.

[Doggygirl]

I'm Struggling .....

Hi BB. Just wanted to say that I'm thinking of you and rooting for you, whatever plan you decide on. Conquering the Booze Beast sure is a challenge!

DG

[rudemama]

I'm Struggling .....

Thinking of you Betty. Feeling out of control is scary. Take Care over the Weekend. rudemama

[trixietrack]

I'm Struggling .....

Hi BB I did the same thing last weekend felt awful depressed, you name it. I put a note on my fridge that says remember the hangovers and the depression.
I was so mad at myself. and some of my friends who think I am much more fun when drunk.
Now I am staying AF for a while. it took 3 days to recover from that.
I neglected my house my cat my art.
felt and looked yucky.
we need to get a hold of this wild beast girlfriend. lets do it!!! :l