All my life, while watching movies or TV shows, or reading a novel, and the characters aren't drinking, I've thought "How strange!!" Even when I was a kid, before I started drinking, it seemed odd to me, as every adult I knew got drunk every day. And during my adulthood, drinking myself, I'd watch a character under stress and think, "Why doesn't she have a damn drink???" And getting to know other adults who didn't drink all the time, I thought, "How weird is THAT. What DO they do at night??"
For me, drinking daily was a normal way of life. Does that therefore mean that I thought non-drinkers are abnormal?
Now that I can go several nights without a single craving for drink - I simply make dinner, spend time with my daughter, read, clean my house - I realize that THIS is "normal".
It may seem like a trivial revelation, but to me it's a revelation nonetheless. Know what I mean? It says a lot about the mindset we drinkers have, or me, at least -- just as noon means lunchtime, evening and social occasions mean drinking time.
I'm not quite sure how I got here from drinking as heavily and daily as I had been just a few months ago. Somehow, while acheiving more and more AF days that became increasingly more comfortable, and the drinking days came to be the exception rather than the rule, my mindset has changed. A paradigm shift. And I think the shift in my mindset might be the biggest factor in my nearly effortless ability to not drink but once or twice a week.
And to be DOING things! I've never much thought about DOING things that took away from my drinking time!! This occurred to me tonight as I decided to volunteer to serve dinner to seniors on Thanksgiving, and to take a writing course.
So this is what it's like to not have alcohol as the center of my life! Just like a "normal" person!!
Whodathunk??!!
Now, dare I say, I am not only My Own Woman, but I also have My Own Life.
I guess that's the ultimate goal of conquering addiction. To own one's self and life. Now I get it.
For me, drinking daily was a normal way of life. Does that therefore mean that I thought non-drinkers are abnormal?
Now that I can go several nights without a single craving for drink - I simply make dinner, spend time with my daughter, read, clean my house - I realize that THIS is "normal".
It may seem like a trivial revelation, but to me it's a revelation nonetheless. Know what I mean? It says a lot about the mindset we drinkers have, or me, at least -- just as noon means lunchtime, evening and social occasions mean drinking time.
I'm not quite sure how I got here from drinking as heavily and daily as I had been just a few months ago. Somehow, while acheiving more and more AF days that became increasingly more comfortable, and the drinking days came to be the exception rather than the rule, my mindset has changed. A paradigm shift. And I think the shift in my mindset might be the biggest factor in my nearly effortless ability to not drink but once or twice a week.
And to be DOING things! I've never much thought about DOING things that took away from my drinking time!! This occurred to me tonight as I decided to volunteer to serve dinner to seniors on Thanksgiving, and to take a writing course.
So this is what it's like to not have alcohol as the center of my life! Just like a "normal" person!!
Whodathunk??!!
Now, dare I say, I am not only My Own Woman, but I also have My Own Life.
I guess that's the ultimate goal of conquering addiction. To own one's self and life. Now I get it.
c: :heart:
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