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    #16
    Labels and Stigma

    I think the negative stigma largely is what it is because heavy drinkers can exhibit behaviors that are unaccepted. Smokers are looked down on more now, obese people are criticized - but "alcoholics" are viewed as beging another category because their addiction often affects others (bar fights, domestic abuse, drunk driving, beligerent behavior, etc). Therefore, drinkers are portrayed as "bad" people based on this model.
    Problem is, these behaviors aren't true for all alcoholics.

    I've never gone to an AA meeting - mostly because there was NO WAY IN HELL I would stand up and declare myself an alcoholic. I may be one, by standard definition, but I will not define myself as such as it is only part of what I am, and why would I own such a negatively viewed label?
    FINALLY -- I'm a non-drinker!!

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      #17
      Labels and Stigma

      before they called it "alcoholic" The term was "habitual drunkard". alcoholic beverages change peoples behavior, sometimes dramatically. It's almost like dealing with someone who is demented. The last thing I would want to do is label myself something so negative. It's like screaming at the top of your lungs that you are a complete failure. Now how the hell are you supposed to heal and grow thinking like that?

      This is not the case with cigarettes although they are so overwhelmingly stinky , that I can't even be around anyone who smokes.
      You can't turn a pickle into a cucumber

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        #18
        Labels and Stigma

        "Don't worry about what people think...

        They don't do it very often...":H

        I prefer to be just my nutty little self.:thanks:
        The only thing worth stealing is a kiss...:flower: zwink:

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          #19
          Labels and Stigma

          Jude - that's great - larfed too! (And need to remember it!)

          Satori? Feeling better now?!?!?! :H

          Wonder how Neil feels about the diverse reactions here....!
          :heart: c: :heart:
          "Be patient and gentle with yourself - the magic is in you."

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            #20
            Labels and Stigma

            Hey MaggieD!! Nice to see you...or perhaps I have not beenaround the general boards much. How are you??

            Asfor your analysis Dear, I think it is total bullshit. I coudl dissect but I won't.

            oh ..the thread question..I detest the word..it has such a social stigma as well as the word "addict" ...It should simply be called "Neuro-Chemical Disorder"..like a (NCD)!!! Like all of the other million disorders out there.. with abbreviations

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              #21
              Labels and Stigma

              I'm with chrysa on this one.

              It's a chemical imbalance in the brain, just like the rest of 'em. Addictive behaviour alone can be inherited.

              Cashy of the many chemical imbalances (NCDs if ya like!)
              "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans" - John Lennon

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                #22
                Labels and Stigma

                Like many of you, I hate the word alcholic. But even worse, I don't like the term "recovering alcoholic". If I ever beat this and become AF, I will consider myself a non-drinker. Not ex drinker, or recovering bs. Recovering just reminds you of the battle...I don't want to be reminded! That's my two cents.
                It's a brand new day!

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                  #23
                  Labels and Stigma

                  Peggy - I am so with you. I choose 'non-drinker'.... why give anyone ammunition to beat us up with....people love to churn around in other people's 'stuff'; keeps them from having to deal with their own, but they can cause untold problems for, in this case, 'us' in the process.

                  I have just seen my doc for the ol' hormones.... he said how well I looked and I thanked him... I then asked him what he had written in my notes back in May when I turned up in his surgery at my 'bottom'... I was appalled to hear he had said, amongst the obvious (shaking, in a state, concerned) "1 x spirit bottle a day" long term. (2 days which is why I was there!!) "She and partner want her to do rehab..." No way! Partner (ex!) wanted me to and my doc said he didn't think it was necessary. (Wasn't) "Attending CADA" (local alc/drugs centre) No, I didn't - wouldn't accept me as I wasn't 'bad enough'!! "Attending AA - Well Done"... is there a 'despair smiley' in the choice we've got here?!?

                  I am lucky I know - but I think, like everything else in my funny naive life!, I did at 49 what some 'kids' do in their teens/twenties - binged crazily, got scared and never did it again.... Yes, I felt I was drinking too much and had got to 'needing' drink so.... I needed 'help', just not a label!
                  How I wish (with that old thing called hindsight I know!) I had simply not 'done' that weekend (along with many a student I guess!) and just found this forum first!

                  He did say he had written that a week later I had "returned 'dry' and with normal bloods".... but was that written large enough in my notes for future docs to bother to read beyond the first, incorrect, entry?

                  The 'what ifs' come in now (I know, I know!)....'what if' I meet/work for someone who wants me to set up something, e.g. life insurance for myself, and then 'discovers' through my being turned down. (Back to you, PeggySue, I am just a non-drinker thank you. Am I really going to have to dig all this up again to 'air my dirty washing'?? I want to leave this behind and move forwards at some point...) 'What if' future docs pin my medical life on that one entry? I wish I'd never been to see him back then.....or gone out with that b***** man who was hell bent on labelling me with something the entire time we were going out. If it wasn't al.lic it was everything in the amateur psychology comics he read. It really beat me down.

                  My doc said that that was a 'man thing'...."men like to 'fix things' and so his heart was in the right place"... I know, I know....but I'm the one with this label stuck on me now...ex-partner wont suffer much from being a 'fixaholic' will he?!?!

                  No, I HATE the label and its consequential stigma. I felt really good until I asked - silly me! I had to know though. I can't un-do my stupidness but will I ever be able to leave it behind? THAT label will hold it to me forever and I've worked so hard to not to wear it!! To stop and deal with the causes....grrrrr!

                  Thank Dog for MWO and the body of us folk who can be there to praise and support...unsung heroes otherwise...that's us!!

                  Thanks - bit of a ramble I know... think the title of this thread 'matters' to me don't you?!??!
                  Love FMS xx
                  :heart: c: :heart:
                  "Be patient and gentle with yourself - the magic is in you."

                  Comment


                    #24
                    Labels and Stigma

                    Adnil, be carefull...sugar is much worse than most of the "food pyramid" experts would have us believe. L-Glutamine is great for both alcohol and sugar cravings fortunately
                    nosce te ipsum
                    (Know Thyself)

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                      #25
                      Labels and Stigma

                      Too right Deter! Now trying to go 'sugar-mod'! Grrr! But just might be the cause of my sore joints? (The sugar that is...?)
                      :heart: c: :heart:
                      "Be patient and gentle with yourself - the magic is in you."

                      Comment


                        #26
                        Labels and Stigma

                        I`m past caring what anyone labels us..........we know that there`s only good in our hearts and that`s what really matters.

                        Starlight Impress x

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                          #27
                          Labels and Stigma

                          Hi, All.

                          Agree 100%. Labels are for cans.

                          Human beings are far too complex to stick labels on. Not to mention, we're in a constant state of flux, anyway. Life's an adventure, no? And if we don't bob and weave accordingly...if we stay "stuck" someplace "comfy" with our traditional "label" and refuse to "change," even when it's in our best interest...where are we?

                          So. No labels for me. Too confining.

                          I'm a work in progress (needing LOADS of progress, admittedly), thanks very much.

                          -HopefulNow
                          Taking it all in

                          Comment


                            #28
                            Labels and Stigma

                            So agree...I do...! No labels on me by me.... That's why I chose my name, "Finding" because the journey is a blessing and the day I 'get it' will be day I get into my box....!

                            But it's the 'bobbing and weaving', the ducking and diving other people's
                            labels that gets me.... the one's where you can't actually say to them, "Labels are for cans." The computer stored 'labels' that wreck your chances of a job/insurance/character references without even being spoken by a 'real' person.... The damage done 'behind your back' by gossip...no-one can stop them and so don't mix with them....but it's horrible to discover that 'a label' was the thing that wrecked your dream....especially after the massively hard work and courage that goes in to being here at MWO and succeeding...

                            But, yes, we are bigger than that...and on we go. As do many in other situations of course.
                            :heart: c: :heart:
                            "Be patient and gentle with yourself - the magic is in you."

                            Comment


                              #29
                              Labels and Stigma

                              HopefulNow & FindingMS
                              Right ARM!!:goodjob: DITTO on that !! I just love that. "Labels are for cans!"
                              That might be worth going to just one more AA meeting so I could POP that one out just before leaving!:thanks:
                              The only thing worth stealing is a kiss...:flower: zwink:

                              Comment


                                #30
                                Labels and Stigma

                                Saint Jude,

                                HA! I might actually deign to pop into that AA meeting just so I can see you in action!

                                And Finding...yes, yes, YES. So much damage done by other people/computers/charts/etc.

                                As if we don't do enough damage to ourselves as it is.

                                What was it George Harrison said on his deathbed? "Love one another." Something simple...and beautiful...like that.

                                Would that we could.

                                The MWO forums certainly seem to get that simple message, though, so this is a great place to hang out and feel supported. And I certainly thank you ALL for that.

                                -HopefulNow (on day 8 of 25 mg. of topa...still drinking, though, but the doc advised the change wasn't going to happen overnight, so I'm still...HopefulNow)
                                Taking it all in

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