NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

[Senex]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

Shikakai;247735 wrote: I thought Saturday night I could go out and not drink, ya right!

Let us know tomorrow how your party went. I can't see myself out and about while everyone is carousing but me... especially since I have always been HEAD carouser.

It's awful the GRIP alcohol has on our minds and our bodies. Alcohol has run my life for at least the last 10 years. When I was 35, I knew I was in trouble but didn't know how to stop it. Still don't. That's why I'm here.

I know what I?m saying doesn?t mean anything until I manage to actually DO it?

But that said, I understand that I?m not going to be able to manage tonight on sheer emotion and ?willpower?. If I let myself be guided by in the moment emotion I?m done. So in the moment, now, I say ?No more drinking?; and then tonight, when I?m around everyone else, and it feels natural, my emotions will tell me to drink.

And as I resist the temptation to drink, my anxiety will increase and my willpower give way. I can?t do this through emotions.

I can only do it through mechanics. Kind of like what I use to get out of bed and go to work in the morning. I know I?m going to ?feel? like drinking tonight. So I?m trying to anticipate that feeling, and generate some mechanical reactions to it. Create a distance from it, in a way.

I don?t know if I?ll succeed; but I?ll try. And I?ll hopefully learn. Maybe if I fail, I?ll just have to stay home next year.

But I won?t succeed by relying on how I feel right now, or by relying on my willpower. I know that now; I?ve tried that approach and failed. The last two nights I?ve been at parties, and have tried anticipating my emotions and creating a distance from them as they occur. I feel the anxiety of not drinking, and I then tell myself why I?m putting myself in an uncomfortable spot; remember the stakes; and try to turn it around from self-deprivation to embracing my health and my own sanity. And so far, I haven't drank for the last two nights.

After tonight, the holiday party season slows down and I can get a chance to think about the long term a little better. For now, I need to get through NYE.

Ok, sorry to rave on and on about this. Just groping along in the dark.

[KateH1]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

Oh, tkeene, I did not say that because of you at all......just thought that perhaps I should make my intentions clear, for those that read in to things at times.

Shakakai,

If you knew me, and if you would know that I speak straight up, I do not hide my intentions. Nothing on this thread was directed at you. In fact, I will state right now, I am tired of the talk of suicide nearly every day, it is a real downer. So many here have reached out to you and continue to do so, while you are bent and determined to continue drinking..........Frankly, that is your decision, I accept that you do not really want to stop, you just want some where to rant. So, rant. There are many, many people here who sincerly want to stop drinking and get their lives together, I will continue to reach out to those people. Honestly, you are paranoid, if you think there is some sort of secret messaging going on here about you. I assure you there is not!

[Shikakai]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

You're not the only one groping in the dark, Senex.

Cindi, I know what you're say is right. Us fence straddlers should take the advice that successful AFers are giving out, but tonight is just not it for me. I will be in a better position to try and AF once this year is over. The "pull" is just too strong. I went by Beverages and Mo! yesterday and the place was packed to the rafters. I know it's even worse today.

I just have to plan to drink a very dry champagne (sugar makes me sleepy/tired) and stick to that. No vodka martinis. That's why I'm an alcoholic! Before I started drinking them, I stuck to wine only and that was fine. I wasn't even drinking every day. Next year will be better.

I'm not offended by you calling me out, Keene... I know I'm one of the people you and Kate are referring to and I know you are right.

Survived the brink of death last night, but ready for a repeat. It doesn't make sense. Another thing I don't try and do, too, Cindi, is to try and stop drinking on a Fri/Sat. night. I have tried that repeatedly.

My biggest fear is that the champagne won't be enough and once I get that "buzz", I'll be right back on the martinis. It's almost like the gospel! But I'm trying to "moderate" a little and at least I'm not behind the wheel. That's the biggest concern because the cops tonight are taking in prisoners. No amount of begging, pleading, bribing or anything else is going to keep the cuffs off.

[Shikakai]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

Kate, even if you are or are not talking about me, what you said is true. I can't dispute that.

I am afraid I am becoming a downer, but please don't give up on me.

I'm going to be very careful tonight. I just have to get through TONIGHT and then I can seriously work on putting this all behind me.

Thank you for your continued patience, and I'll stop talking about suicide. It only makes me feel worse and more depressed and it doesn't help the other people who are suffering too.

I am calling the doctor on Wednesday for an appointment. Hopefully, he can see me the same day or one day this week.

[Cinders]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

Shikakai,

No one here will "give up" on you. Only you can do that.

We will be here for you.

I truly hope you find a counselor who can help.

I have 4 numbers to call after tomorrow, too.

Good luck to us both on that one!!

Love,
Cindi

[joesgal]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

Well my expectations for this evening are simple, I said that I couldn't handle trying to moderate and that is still the case, so I am having a nice quiet time at home without any alcohol and I hope and pray that this is just the start of many years of sobriety for me. Thanks for all your posts and have a great new year all, joesgal

[Lotus]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

I hate this time of year

Well I'm hoping that this year I can manage to abstain from this beast. I am fed up of family around me so quick to brand me an alcoholic, yet drink themselves to oblivion, argue with famiy then blame it on me that I was the one to offer the drink.

Sorry peeps on a bit of a downer tonight. Can't believe it's New year's eve. Feels like a funeral in my house, everyone blaming me for someone else's shortcomings.

Wishing you all a Hapy New Year.

Mandy x

[FinallyRN]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

You know I've been having anxiety attacks for the last 2 days!! That is so unlike me. I had to really look at why? I now think its because of the pressure of the night and the resolutions. There are a group of us who have committed to 30 days AF...........I'm panicking. The stupid thing is that I've done it before but by myself, for myself, if I failed I only answered to me. I guess its a good thing that I care about you all so much. Don't want to disappoint anyone let alone myself. I tell myself its only one day, just like any other.......I know that...... I'm sure I'll be ok tomorrow.......anyone else feel stressed?

[lucky 2.0]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

I am just looking forward to waking up on 1.1.2008 all smug because I am not hung over and so many others will be. And then pop some Campral because I plan to go AF. I have one occassion I will drink @ in a few weeks but will not drink alone in the house any longer. Those days are over! I anticipate having clean body and clean mind for the new year.

Remember, just one day @ a time....

And breathe deeply.

[KateH1]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

Hi Lotus, good job on working on staying alcohol free amidst the obvious difficulties. Sorry you are having a tough time of it. I guess the only thing I can say is that you do not have to own what other people say. Nor do you have to won any labels that anyone else chooses to put on you. Easier said than done, I know, but, believe it or not, after a while, being able to ignore what other's think, say and do, becomes a habit just like anything else.
Stay Strong!
Hugs,
KateH

RN,
I know how you feel.......only I had all of these feelings earlier in the week. I was actually thinking that maybe we should go to one of the parties that we were invited to. This is always a fun and very nice party with a lot of our friends and colleagues. Last year I actually had a lot of fun at this party and did not turn into an ass because of alcohol........we left early!

But in the end, we decided to stay home and have fun AF here! For me staying AF is far more about having a plan and planning for success, leaving no option for failure. It seems the second I get on the fear and worry track, I am in trouble.

Hope you get to feeling better, and remember, it is only the media hype that makes today any different than any other Monday!
Hugs,
KateH

[9Lives]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

AF New Year's Eve

Hi all - I am in the Bay area too. I am staying home tonight, and going AF. It just seems like the right way to start the New Year for me. Will be the first time in at least 25 years that I have done so. Quite a statement for me to make, if only to myself.

I have toyed briefly throughout the day thus far with going out and tossing back a few, with something delicious to eat. Fortunately it is also freezing outside, windy and I have not put on my makeup yet for the day. All good reasons not to trouble myself, and/or scare anyone to death with my beauteous good looks without my camouflage on.

:alf:

Best wishes to all on the board--

9Lives

[KateH1]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

Hey 9Lives and Welcome to MWO.....(see this is post #1 for you!). Listen, we think you look absolutely Fabulous!! No makeup.....who would have ever guess!

So stay home with us, order in, and if you feel like company, hop on chat! I am sure there will be several mwo'ers here to night to keep good company!

Best Wishes to you!
KateH

[MyOwnWoman]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

Hey ! I just decided what I'm gonna do tonight.

I'm going to make my Vision Board!!

[9Lives]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

Thanks for the welcome, KateH. You are correct, that was my first post. I have been lurking for a while. Time to go public with my bold proclamations.

I hope I can make this work tonight. Honestly, you are right about the TV. Every time I see the darn confetti dropping on strangers toasting with forced cheer, I want to reach for a drink. Definitely a Pavlovian dog sort of thing.

9Lives

[KateH1]

NEW YEARS EVE EXPECTATIONS??

WOW!! MOW.....Truly a Brilliant Idea!! Can I about dinner and a movie and join you! Naaa...I promised sweetie the whole night!!

Dream Big....HUGE!!!
Love,
KateH

MyOwnWoman;247819 wrote: Hey ! I just decided what I'm gonna do tonight.

I'm going to make my Vision Board!!