blackout/passout?
It's funny. Blackouts are one of the common things we share in this special club. My husband has never had one. I know he and my kids look down on my for mine. My oldest daughter would start asking me 20 questions the next day just to confirm the fact that I was drinking. She would start off very vague, almost reeling me in and then she would go in for the kill and ask me a direct question that I could not answer. The countless feelings of shame is just not worth it. So I am really really trying to moderate. I have done really good for 2 weeks. Haven't been drunk once. Most I have had at one time is 3 glasses. I just don't feel like I have control because I still sneak just in case I decide to have more.
But back to the blackouts. I have done everything from the classic goofy funny stuff to crying my eyes out, to screaming at my husband telling him I hate him, to trying to have a conversation with my kids who probably hate me because they know I am drunk and I have no idea what I am doing. I have gotten 2 DUIs (thankfully a while ago) I have ran my car into a light pole going full speed (that one didn't get a DUI because the police never showed up, my husband came and picked me up and called the police, they did the report over the phone....wow, talk about a miracle)
I NEVER WANT TO BLACK OUT AGAIN. It is to humilitating.
It's funny. Blackouts are one of the common things we share in this special club. My husband has never had one. I know he and my kids look down on my for mine. My oldest daughter would start asking me 20 questions the next day just to confirm the fact that I was drinking. She would start off very vague, almost reeling me in and then she would go in for the kill and ask me a direct question that I could not answer. The countless feelings of shame is just not worth it. So I am really really trying to moderate. I have done really good for 2 weeks. Haven't been drunk once. Most I have had at one time is 3 glasses. I just don't feel like I have control because I still sneak just in case I decide to have more.
But back to the blackouts. I have done everything from the classic goofy funny stuff to crying my eyes out, to screaming at my husband telling him I hate him, to trying to have a conversation with my kids who probably hate me because they know I am drunk and I have no idea what I am doing. I have gotten 2 DUIs (thankfully a while ago) I have ran my car into a light pole going full speed (that one didn't get a DUI because the police never showed up, my husband came and picked me up and called the police, they did the report over the phone....wow, talk about a miracle)
I NEVER WANT TO BLACK OUT AGAIN. It is to humilitating.
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