And I never want to repeat it again. Hello to you my friends.
On Wednesday night I went out with my friends to the pub. They went home at 11pm and I stayed drinking til 2. I then didnt want to go home because I knew my husband would be mad as hell with me....so I called a cab and asked him to take me to a bridge so i could jump off. Obviously he didnt want to do that. So i asked him to take me to the hospital because i needed help. He was very kind to me and stayed with me while i talked to the Drs there. I asked them in my drunken state if i could be committed. What a mistake that was! I was taken to a hospital far away and put into the Mental-Health ward. I was so scared...I can't tell you. I dont know if any of you have ever been to a ward like that but it is NOT a nice place to be.. I was so frightened and sobbed non-stop for hours. They gave me pills in the end to make me sleep. No one could give me any answers about leaving this place and i was concerned that if I became too upset..they would section me. Thankfully I was allowed out today, after i convinced the pyschiatric consultant that i was no longer suicidal. She is organising for the Home help Team to visit me daily to give me some support. I think i got off lightly. But i will be watched from now on as i have a 9 week old baby and a 5 yr old to look after. I can't let them be taken into care. Very depressing thought. My husband and my dad have been tremendous through out this dreadful ordeal. I CAN NO LONGER DRINK ANY ALCOHOL EVER> I will definatly loose everything i have and will be put away in this Mental Ward for a long time. I will tell you this...If you are not mad when you go into these places...you will be by the time you go out. I was going out of my mind and Hell springs to mind.
Anyway, I am home now. I am with my babies again and i am soooo grateful to have this second chance...I have used them up now... Its time for me to grow up and be happy with my life.
thanks for reading this.
Bella xxxx
On Wednesday night I went out with my friends to the pub. They went home at 11pm and I stayed drinking til 2. I then didnt want to go home because I knew my husband would be mad as hell with me....so I called a cab and asked him to take me to a bridge so i could jump off. Obviously he didnt want to do that. So i asked him to take me to the hospital because i needed help. He was very kind to me and stayed with me while i talked to the Drs there. I asked them in my drunken state if i could be committed. What a mistake that was! I was taken to a hospital far away and put into the Mental-Health ward. I was so scared...I can't tell you. I dont know if any of you have ever been to a ward like that but it is NOT a nice place to be.. I was so frightened and sobbed non-stop for hours. They gave me pills in the end to make me sleep. No one could give me any answers about leaving this place and i was concerned that if I became too upset..they would section me. Thankfully I was allowed out today, after i convinced the pyschiatric consultant that i was no longer suicidal. She is organising for the Home help Team to visit me daily to give me some support. I think i got off lightly. But i will be watched from now on as i have a 9 week old baby and a 5 yr old to look after. I can't let them be taken into care. Very depressing thought. My husband and my dad have been tremendous through out this dreadful ordeal. I CAN NO LONGER DRINK ANY ALCOHOL EVER> I will definatly loose everything i have and will be put away in this Mental Ward for a long time. I will tell you this...If you are not mad when you go into these places...you will be by the time you go out. I was going out of my mind and Hell springs to mind.
Anyway, I am home now. I am with my babies again and i am soooo grateful to have this second chance...I have used them up now... Its time for me to grow up and be happy with my life.
thanks for reading this.
Bella xxxx
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