Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

[KateH1]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Happy Friday!

Well, I am taking a half day of vacation today!! To prepare for my granddaughters B-Day party tomorrow! It has been wonderful having my oldest son here all week!! It will be a busy weekend and next week will be crazy with work...but....I am taking a few days of vacation around the 4th of July! Boy, you are so right, Tearful.....I could never be doing all of this were I still drinking and hung over....so glad I am not dealing with that!!

Yes, those helicopters have made me think that more is going on than we know about. I do not scare easy, but, I must admit, this has me a bit concerned!

It sounds like all of our wonderful group of non-drinkers is sailing along, challenges and all!!! Ya, gotta love it!!

Have a Safe and Wonderful Weekend Dear Friends!
XXX Kate

[meditation mama]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Hello, my dear friends!!

I have spent an hour catching up here.. so many new faces. That is a GOOD thing!

Well, just a quick check in to BUMP this baby up!

I am off for a hike then to my DD's Dad's wedding - yep you heard it. I do like his fiancee, they have lived together for 5 years. She is fantastic and great with DD. They don't plan on having any kids, so they spend a lot of time with her.

My STBX will also be there - MY GOD this town is too small!!! Hoepfully he will NOT bring his new girlfriend. He did however call last night and ask if he could bring the divorce papers to the wedding so I could have a look... YEP, you heard it right... He would like me to look over divorce papers while I am helping my daughter get dressed as the flower girl for my ex-ex's wedding. YOU HAVE TO LAUGH! I told him, "sure, why don't you bring them - oh and your new girlfriend, and maybe we could even get DD's Dad and new wife and we can all sit down talk about it over shrimp" ... CLUELESS! NO WONDER I DRANK while I was married to him!

Oh, well.. I am very happy today regardless. Have a fabulous dress, have lost 20 pounds and will probably be one of the only sober people at this thing. Life is good.

I will check in tomorrow when I have more time to read the last few days of your lives.. and probably have some pretty funny stories!

Have a great day all!

MM

[meditation mama]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Well, I made it through the wedding - and it was acutally beautiful and I had a great time. I did see STBX and we kept it very civil. He was actually folllowing me around - and introduced me to a guest as his wife.. I just smiled. My daughter was so proud of me and very happy that I was sober - I could tell. I left after a few hours and enjoyed my 1 hour drive home.

I am pretty darn proud of myself. It was a good test for me. Everyone was drinking and starting to get buzzed when I left. I had no desire to stay and no desire to drink - even with the pressure of seeing a lot of people I haven't seen for 10 years.. I felt like such a big girl!

Well, I'm off to bed - healthy, happy and tomorrow, hangover free!!

Nighty, night.. catch up tomorrow.

MM

[KateH1]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Good morning All,

MM, I am so happy that you and your daughter had a good time at the wedding and that you managed the whole thing without a drop! I knew you would, you had a plan!! You even found the elusive Sporks for your daughters gift!!

Today I am off to spend the day with my children and granddaughters. The B-day party went really well yesterday! Everyone, especially the B-Day girl had a great time! The only negative of the day way my exDIL's live in boyfriend came, and as usual mananged to make an ass of himself!! He is such a looser, on every level!!

But, today is a beautiful day and we are going to enjoy it!

XXX Kate

[Beck]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Hi everyone,

Dropping in for a moment and then back to the unpacking. Who knew we had so much stuff???

Honestly, it has been a tough few weeks for me. I guess it would be tough sober or drunk - so I chose sober. Good choice

MM, you sound so happy and well adjusted. I have to admit that I'm glad my life is not that complicated.

Glad everyone here is moving happily forward.

Back to the boxes...
Beck

[kaddy]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

morning everyone,, hope the weekend went well for everyone,,
becks up the move is going well,, my sister has just moved,,, from a 7 bedroom to a 2 beedroom,,, l don,t think she new what hit her,,, she took for to much with her,,, any way good luck and may it be all happy time there

[livingfree]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Oh my I have a lot of reading and catching up to do!! So I'm bumping up - so I can come back later and read - my Darling Daughter is pulling in the driveway for a couple of day visit!! Yipee!

[livingfree]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

This thread was on page 4 ~ It's getting harder and harder to find in the sea of threads :eeks: I will have to assume that it is because we are all moving into our sober lives without need to cling to anything ? Since I was the last to post here, and I'm posting again .... maybe I'll just use this as my blog page. If WW were back, she could re-teach me how to post photos. I still have to post my new motercycle picture.

So - I am heading to BOSTON! DD is moving and I am heading there to help look for an apartment. I'm taking my laptop - but don't know how much time I'll have to check in ... so if anyone comes back to this thread - thats that!!

Love you all

[wonderworld]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

I'm right here Liv!!! Hi sweetie!!! So good to see you old friend. Yes, I was unBELIEVABLY busy, but I'm almost recovered and back to normal. More on all that later. How ARE YOU and HOW IS EVERYONE ?!?!?! Anyone out there?

I'm still rocking the AF, and feeling awesome. Life's challenges continue, but I'm rolling with it baby!

More later..... wanted to post this ASAP....

Love WW xox

[livingfree]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Hello WW!! Am I ever happy to see you!! I have missed you so much!! I fly out in the morning for Boston! I've been thinking about you and hoping you would check in. When you can - you will have to give an update on this crazy schedule you are on! You sound good and that makes my :h happy!

Hope to catch up soon!!! Love ya Lady!

[kaddy]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

hi all,, hope everyone is doing ok
sorry not posted for a bit,, but been very busy

[BELIEVE]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Hi everyone. Just checking in to say hi and let y'all know I'm still around. Haha Liv again you've saved our beloved thread from fading into obscurity. 4th page? Wow. But you make a great point about us all moving into our normal lives. Our new AF lives I guess.

I been working like crazy l8ly. I'm in the middle of working 12 in a row, I just did 8 day shifts and now I'm going in for at least 4 night shifts, although that could turn to 6, we'll see when I get there 2night.

Had something thats been nagging at me latley though, maybe I'll throw it out there and see what everyone thinks. I got this AF thing down. At one point I wanted AF to be the norm for me instead of drinking all the damn time. Got that. Problem is that I dont feel normal. I feel like someone with a fucked up problem I couldn't control, and because of that I can't occasionally have drinks in social settings where everyone else is. I dont have a problem not drinking under these circumstances don't get me wrong. Its just that I would feel more like a "normal" person if I could partake on special occasions, then go back to being AF the rest of the time, instead of being "Mr. Recovering alcoholic standing on the edge of a slippry slope", if thats what I am.

I'm really gr8ful for the last (damn near) 7 months AF, don't get me wrong, I thank God for it every day. But still I don't know. This nagging feeling that I'm not quite normal yet, this feeling that hters one more step I could take towards total mastery of myself...I just don't know. And honestly everytime I actually think of going to the liquor store or maybe having a beer at work, I can't bring myself to do it. Not so much that I want a drink as I want the ability to have one without falling off again. SOunds retarded I know but its really bothering me.

[wonderworld]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

No Believe. Not retarded at all. HEALTHY. Huh?!?!?! You're looking at the situation, examining your feelings about it, and you're talking about it which means you really want to get it off your chest and work it through. That's HEALTHY. And you don't have to "figure it out" in the BIG way right this second, so that's good.

AND....... I think you are describing a state of mind that alot of people in AA come up against in my experience and they don't have a place to share it openly and get open-minded feedback, which is HEALTHY. So right on for both you AND MWO.

The first thing that comes to mind is this question - what do you think about the moderating route? Sounds like when you talk about how you would LIKE to drink, it's a special occasion type thing, not the day- to- day kind of drinking. That would mean a different approach than total abstinence, obviously, so there's the MWO moderating plan you could try.

But......... as we are friends from way back...... I'm going to throw something else out there - are you sure that what you're feeling is exclusively about drinking or not drinking? In other words, is the CAUSE of the anxiety going to be 'fixed' by drinking, or will it be that the alcohol is 'taking the edge off' it ? If it's the latter, then you'll just be treading water, you know? And that's no good. Nothing will change on a profound level and you will be right back where you started, eventually.

And..... you may really HATE this.... but sometimes just AF is not enough. Sometimes you need more. In my case, MUCH more! For me alcohol was medication for psychic pain, if you know what I mean. There's a reason (many of them actually) why escaping reality has been so appealing my whole life. Taking the alcohol away makes those feelings raw and they can really start to grate on you as the AF time goes by.

Can you shake up the norm somehow? Get out of your routine and try something new? How about therapy? (a saving grace in my life), or meditation classes (ditto). I'm just saying...... it sounds like your thoughts are driving you crazy and I can totally relate. Sometimes I can't get unstuck without help from one or more other humans with something good to teach me or to help me to discover about myself. You are such an interesting person Believe. So funny and smart. You're so very worth it. I wish there were a magic solution for you to be instantly happy and free. For all of us!

And your work schedule sounds brutal. Maybe you are burnt out and need some rest and some fun. When I'm really plaid out, I can't even REALLY recall what feeling good feels like. You WILL have some fun again, no?

Okay, enough blabbering from me for now.

How great to see you guys! Liv check in from Boston. If I weren't burnt out myself, I would drive up there and harass you! Okay, hug you.

I've seen Kate (kiss kiss). Is Thankful in the house? Anyone else out there? I feel a little reunion coming on!

WW xox

[wonderworld]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

and hi kaddy!!! Good to see you!!!! Glad you're doing well

WW xox

[BELIEVE]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Well hello Wonder, nice 2cu again BTW!

I think your analysis makes a lot of sense, plus its nice to have your support (you guys have ALL been gr8 since day 1).

I guess whats really weird for me is the fact that i'm not even 100% sure I want a drink. I think for me its having the ability to, say, have a few tonight, then just be AF again tomorrow. AF would still be my normal state, its just knowing that if an occasion came up I could partake and not go back to where I was 7 months ago. I certainly don't want that. I'm still at the point where I would have to actually force myself to drink if I were to have one, I'm so used to being AF (and I'm still enjoying it) so I'm not teetering on any brinks here....I'm just saying..

I think I got Al beat, but not mastered. Its like a game show where I could take my AF life and go home, or go for the uber-prize and risk losing what I got. I think inside I've already made that choice, I can't just rest on my laurels, eventually I always want to do better. Doing better by drinking? Sounds ludicrous but like I said its not so much about the drink itself. Its about being normal and not having a problem anymore. Remaining AF for life is certainly doable, but for me it seems like thats hiding from my problem, not beating it.