Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

[livingfree]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

BELIEVE;368730 wrote: Hi LVT.

successful modding and af living look a lot alike. If your focus is on being af with al popping in from time to time

This is the statement of the year! Wow Believe I never really thought about it this way but you are exactly right! True Moderating should look a lot like being Alcohol free!! I want to start a tread with that title on the general boards -- actually I want to post this whole post ..... and what Det and Kate said.

I resound with an resounding YES YES YES!!

[livingfree]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Determinator;368608 wrote: so is was WW that dropped her drawers in chat. hmmmmmmmm.

can only guarantee this: if you stay AF life will present fewer nasty surprises, and your health will never be in jeopardy by this toxic alkaloid we know all too well. If you do decide to mod then there are no guarantees.

You guys are full of wisdom. Wow - thank you

[BELIEVE]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Something else I forgot to mention this morning is that the re-introduction of al to the body can re-introduce the possibility of actual cravings. I remember reading a post (by Wonder I think) about the chemical changes in the brain after 90 days af. Matter of fact I think its somewhere near the beginning of this thread. Anyway those chemical changes have to do with cravings and all, and I wonder if they can be reversed? I asked this in chat last Sunday bit I'll ask it again for those who weren't there: How many of you actually have the actual alcohol cravings you had when you first stopped? Just the occasional though of al dosen't count. Thats one perk of living af we risk giving up when we decide to take a drink.

Take a step towards the ultimate expression of control over yourself and al, or turna around and start back down the very path that lead you here in the first place. Thats the gamble, I think it should be taken seriously. LVT I'm not directing this post at you BTW, I'm just speaking in general, so don't take it as a flame!

[KateH1]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Believe, Another interesting point! This was also mentioned in another thread, just today. About habit creating neuro pathways. Those pathways can be changed, but once the old behavior has begun again, the old pathways come back!

It makes sense when you think about those that have long time sobriety, many years sometimes, then they pick up a drink and within a few short weeks they are right back to where they were, or worse, before they ever stopped!

[wonderworld]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

BELIEVE;369179 wrote: How many of you actually have the actual alcohol cravings you had when you first stopped? Just the occasional though of al dosen't count.

Zero Believe. I have absolutely NO physical cravings AT ALL. I haven't for months. There's an OCCASIONAL thought. Usually some kind of a romantic notion of slipping into escape mode. Or a euphoric memory of that 'buzz'. Or wanting to "party like it's 1999" (oh that is SO lame).

ANd oh yes - the re-introduction of alcohol into the system absolutely triggers the "craving brain" on a physical level. I think Det might actually have more specific info on the brain chemistry here. But I agree 150%. And it's VERY insidious. And the effect has a long and unpredictable after life . You just don't know where it's going to take you. This is all in my experience only.

I like what's been said about modding here too. I wonder about that all the time. Since I'm not a modder, it's hard to put my finger on it sometimes when I know someone is not really doing the MWO moderating program, but rather just kind of getting by. But then, do we have examples on this board of what could be considered successful MWO-style moderators? Who are they? Just curious. Maybe I'm not getting it.

As always, this thread rocks my world. Love you guys.

WW xox

[BELIEVE]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

What is a successful mwo style modder anyway? It would be nice to establish that. Lol or at least for Mr. "I'm too lazy to read the book for myself" He knows who he is. Maybe someone can help him out

[BELIEVE]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

1999 is a gr8 song BTW. Thought I would share.

[wonderworld]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

thanks for that bud. I know my 45 year old gay ass references can be a iittle, um, gay-assed.

ww xox

[KateH1]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

OK, so, just for Believe I was going to type out several pages on Modding from The Book...I am too tired to do it! So here are the crib notes. After abstaining for no less than 30 days to give us a chance to deprogram our brains and detox our bodies. Modding might be tried.

Modding means to have an "OCCASSIONAL Alcoholic Drink".....key word Occasional. To have a take it or leave it attitude towards Alcohol. To treat it as we would Butter, a little bit adds a tasty treat to a meal, once in a while!

I am so damn grateful for this thread. Today I talked on the phone to a very long term Abs person. We talked about how even though some of us have some "Real" sober time behind us, we still need support. Perhaps even more so, as we live without self medicating and we have a lot to loose should we drink again. I am glad that we can share openly and honestly on this thread. We do not have to constantly worry about accidently stepping on toes. If we do, we simply appologize and move on! You all give me so much strength and wisdom! This is touchy stuff we discuss here and I love each one of you for being who you are!! Yes, we are definitely like a little family!!

xoxoxox Kate

[LVT25]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

I appreciate the advice, and experience and wisdom from this thread. I'm really glad I asked the question. If I DO decide to drink again, at least I will have the information ahead of time.
I have been tested a few times--and the urge was never strong enough to give in to. I will have some challenges coming up, however. I have to keep reminding myself, no one really cares if I don't drink, if they want to call me a party pooper they can, but deep down, they wish they could quit too. Deep down.

I also like the reference to the way our
brain works. I quit smoking basically using Allen Carr's method (among other tools) and it makes sense that alcohol works the same way. If we do the same things over, and over again over many years--it is going to take time to change that "habit". I also wonder if it's this way for all, or if there truly are different degrees of alcoholism. For example--I always drank and smoked together. Always. So I had to quit drinking in order to quit smoking. Now my brain is telling me, well if you can't have a ciggie with that beer--why drink it?? So this theory makes sense to me.

You guys are so smart and well spoken. When I try to explain myself it sounds stupid.:H
Anyway, I hope you get my drift.

:thanks:

[BELIEVE]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

K8 your explanation of mwo style modding is more than adequate, thanks for layin that down. Lol if I'm going to be running my mouth here I might as well be on the same page as everyone else!
LVT, I think you articulate your points just fine. Nice discussion we got going here

[ready2change]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

LVT...I gave up the ciggies back in 1989. Even though I never was a heavy smoker, I ALWAYS smoked when I drank, and I ALWAYS drank every nite. The two went hand in hand. And although at that time, I never even considered giving up AL..I always wanted to quit the cigs...they made me feel like crap, gave me headaches and tasted horrible as well. But I was obviously addicted..because I tried several times and failed.

The last and final time I managed to quit the ciggies, I was unsure of my success because of the drinking. But I wasn't about to give that up as well. Somehow it stuck that last try...and you couldn't talk me into picking up another cigarette if my life depended on it. I am one of "those" reformed smokers, who cannot stand the smell of smoke. It just would NEVER happen.

Move forward to 2008...booze makes me feel just like ciggies used to. AL taste's like crap, makes me feel like crap...lowers my self esteem and makes me gain weight. I keep waiting for my attempts to be free from AL to "stick" just like it did with the ciggies. I am hopeful and I am vigiliant and most of all I am trying to be patient with myself, cause I know it's gonna happen.

And with all the wonderful success stories here, I cannot fail at my quest to be AF...thank you all for being here and sharing your experiences.

R2C

[KateH1]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Believe, I always enjoy, whatever "page" you are on!

LVT, I understand your posts...you always cause me to pause and think. Even though, I have no physical cravings at all.......the momentary thoughts of alcohol are tricky! There are times that I could, all too easily just buy a bottle of wine, all the while fooling myself that I would drink just one glass with dinner and be fine.......arghhhhh! I just don't want to open the door and let all that garbage back in!

I love this thread, for so many reasons. As we live withought AL.....we do change, our thinking changes. Life does not become instantly perfect! We no longer self medicate and at times the desire to just zone out, creeps back in. Being able to share these struggles with others going through similar expereinces is an amazing help!

Love you Guys!
xxx Kate

[LVT25]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

Hi guys,

I had one of those days yesterday--everything went wrong, and my frustration level was really high. We had to go to town in the evening, and I thought to myself after I showered, "Well, maybe if we go out to eat, I will have a couple of beers" I also thought about how I would feel coming here and telling you all. Anyway, My thinking HAS changed. In the past, a day like yesterday would have had been drinking beer and smoking ciggies like there was no tomorrow. Its been hot, dh has cold beers every night........I haven't had a beer almost all summer! How weird is that!!!

As it turns out, no one went out, we came home, I ate a sandwich, watched a movie, and went to bed really tired. No confessions today!!

[Determinator]

Day 31 and Beyond: Hello, I'm a non-drinker

in the immortal words of Homer Simpson:

D-oh...thanks a lot....stupid brain!!

but in all reality we have established that our brains have an electro-chemical wiring problem. but here's the good news. The only time that faulty circuitry can do any harm is when it's "energized". no al = no energy lighting up that bad circuit. simple! a faulty circuit can lay dormant for ever and harm nobody.

it's like having an enemy but you have stole all the ammo out of their guns. all they can do is yell and holler at you. hahahahahaha!!!