Social Housing - Advice Please

[tea]

Hi all,

As some of you may know I am in the process of dissolving my abusive marriage (part of my 'I am a strong, sober, independent, mature lady' process). I am on the various housing providers waiting lists but am getting absolutely nowhere. I have even, embarrasingly, on the advice of one of the providers (housing association) presented myself as homeless to the local Council (the shame). Does anyone have any knowledge of how the system works here? Is there anything I can do to get myself housed that I am not already doing? My situation is that I co-join my property, he will NOT move out so that is not an option, yes I know I can eventually force sale but at the moment that is not an option until I can get myself housed and settled somewhere else as if a sale goes ahead then I am apparently making myself homeless. With the current UK house prices I can not afford to buy a property myself, one income etc and all I want or need is a one bedroomed haven all for me and only me (and my cat of course). Even private rents are disgustingly high, yes I could probably afford it, could probably afford a mortgage BUT I really don't want to work all month just to pay for a roof over my head and have less of a standard of living than someone who doesn't work (and I don't mean that in a derogatory way to anyone who isn't in employment). I want to live a simple, independent life. Any advice?

Thanks in advance.

Lorna xx

[sweetpea]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Hi Lorna

So sorry you have been having a bad time of it. I cannot suggest anything in particular but have you been to the citizens advice bureau? The advice is free and they may be able to point you in the right direction. Sorry I can't be of any more help than that and I hope things improve for you

Sweetpea xx

[tea]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Thanks Sweetpea,
Thanks for responding, I have been in contact with CAB. they advised the homeless route. Ho hum, just have to play the waiting game it seems. A Lottery win would be timely though, lol.

Lxx

[tea]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Just unashamedly bumping this up before I go out for my meeting with housing this pm.

Grin: Lxx

[Niblet]

Social Housing - Advice Please

I wish I could give advice, however I'm from Canada... I just wanted you to know that I'm so proud of you and you have no reason to feel any less of a person than anybody that walks this ol' earth.. Hats off to you and best of luck !!! xxx

[betty boop]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Tea, this may sound drastic but around here we have shelters for abused women, if you were to call in there (not necessarily to stay) but you might find out if it is an option to get housed quicker with that route .......

Sorry that I can't be of more help to you .........

Love & Hugs, BB xx

[hippie37]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Hi Lorna!

I'm pretty much in the same boat as yourself as far as house/flat hunting goes or rather gaining a council property or housing association property. I've been on a waiting list here in Merseyside for about 5 months now. When I split with my girlfriend about 5 months ago we were living on a council estate where we were co-habiting. When I left I had no other option but to move back to my mothers or deem myself homeless and find refuge in a hostel. Not something I was prepared to do with the way things were at that time with my drinking etc. Because I'm not considered a priority at the moment i.e. homeless, people who ARE or who have been on the waiting lists longer will get priority over me. My partner and I were living in a caravan for 2 years before we got offered our first council flat as even this was not considered a 'priority case'!!!. Mind due I loved it as I've done it before and I'd do it again!!! (yes I'm a romantic hippie at heart!!.) The other problem I have is that I can only apply for 1 bedroom properties as they don't class my daughter as living me even though I have access. The whole point of me getting something a bit bigger is so I can spend more time with her than I do and have her overnight with me more. This is something both me and my ex want. The other problem you may have come across yourself is the pet situation. Not many private landlords are willing to accept pets in their property including some of the housing associations here. I don't know how you find it up there in Scotland.

It is a horrible predicament to be in and I can so empathize with you. But as far as my own situation goes I know I've got probably at least another 6 months, maybe more on the waiting lists, before I'll get something. So I've gotta just play the waiting game unfortunately like yourself. I'm just sorry I couldn't come up with any other solutions for you. It seems the only way to get ahead is lie through your teeth and class yourself homeless or No Fixed Abode. I've done that in the past as well where I've lied and said I was living at friends' houses and my mother's address was only a mailing address. Still did no good!!. I have found in the past pestering the hell out of these people can help SOMETIMES even if it only gets you noticed!! (that one's more for private rents/lets)

By the way no offense taken!!

Love and Happiness
Hippie
xx

[cowgal]

Social Housing - Advice Please

in America

I may not be able to give good advice, being in America and all, but I actually thought about the abuse women's shelter, thought about it for myself once or twice when my hubby was scaring me w/ his abusive (verbal) stuff..........

Good luck, I hope you can find something soon to get out of the situation!

love,:h :h

MAuch:

[madisonmay]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Hi Lorna

Did you tell the council you are not only homeless, but you cannot return to you marital home due to an abusive relationship, and your fear for your sanity/safety? Sometimes this works.

Hippy - I heard recently from a council housing dept worker on Merseyside that if you say you cannot possibly live with your mother any longer as it is causing lots of stress to the relationship due to you having not lived there for along time, and your mother can't cope anymore etc etc, and you are losing your sanity, they are supposed to try and sort out accommodation pdq. Worth a try. Hope this helps.

Mary xx

[tea]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Thanks all, yes I have contacted and visited Women's refuges. The Woman's Aid one would cost me 170 pounds a week to stay there, and that is before I buy a loaf of bread etc, they put me on to a hostel type place which would cost me 103 a week and was minging.....

Thanks anyway to all who responded, was hoping to hear something that I hadn't thought about, your responses make me feel not so alone in this.

Love, Lorna xxx

[lucky 2.0]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Tea,

Just wanted you to know I am send you some positive energy from America and so proud of you for doing what needs to be done.

xo

[The Londoner]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Hi Tea
Some years back, a friend of mine had to move out of the marital home with her two kids-she was shown scary high-rise council flats in terrible condition, which she refused. She was lucky, she had a rich friend, who got her set up in a rented flat in a decent part of the city. After she had her tenant's agreement, she approached the council and they paid her rent until such time as her children were older and she went back to work.
This is one example, dating from years back. It might not be of any help, but it's worth looking at your situation creatively. Find out (from CAB?)if you were in (privately)rented accom, what (extenuating)circumstances would make the council pay your rent?

will think about this a bit more
truth is, Scotland has its own rules and regs

I wish you the absolute best with this- what you are doing sounds right for you,
take care of yourself
Anna :l

[southernbelle47]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Oh Tea....I just want to pack you and the kitty up and bring you home with me!
Please know that I am praying for you and while I have not gone through what you have, my heart hurts for women and men in this situation.
You are not alone.....never....
Love,
:h Nancy

[Guest]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Tea, I know you can`t afford to buy a place of your own on the strength of a single income, when you sell the marital home. Just a thought, but have you considered "shared ownership" ?......... where you buy a share in a property (perhaps 25% of market value) and pay rent on the remaining percentage of the property. Also, as far as I`m aware, you can purchase a further stake in the property through time.

I don`t know if there would be anything like this available in your area, but it might be worth looking into and am sure the CAB could advise you on all the legalities. My mum`s friend did this when her marriage broke down........meant she could live in a residential area, where she couldn`t have afforded to stay, had it not been for shared ownership.

Best of luck to you........it`s a tough situation to find yourself in through no fault of your own. :l

Starlight Impress x

[tea]

Social Housing - Advice Please

Hi all and thank you,

Went to my interview with the housing and what Star suggested was what they said would be my best hope of getting housed. There is a scheme called Homestake where you can buy part of a property in a nice area and in time, if you want to, you can buy some more of it until you are purchasing it all if you want to. I am looking into this now. Thank you all again and again and again. You are always there for me.

Lorna xx