Just to update amongst the other sad goings on here...
My Mum died last night at 7.15pm....5 minutes after I walked back in the door of home, 7 hours away, to recharge my batteries for 48 hours and try and Find My Self again after 10 days of just me and my Dad in the house I grew up in and was so, so, so unhappy in....
It's been a long, long 10 days and today I am going back for another 10.... I am so going to try and find some sort of Internet connection but so hope that if I am able to, I find MWO in a happier 'state' than I came back to - not well chosen words at all and sorry if they offend at all, but I just feel sad about this 'energy blip'; this place so to special. Let's hope all is resolved soon?
My Mum deteriorated steadily after her 'sort of stroke' (not a 'bleed' but a lack of oxygen from a near total heart block...pulse went down to 12...) and although nobody really knows (or says), it seems to have been ARDS (acute respiratory distress syndrome) where her body couldn't utilize oxygen despite it being pumped in at max and everything just closed down.
This meant she just slipped into sleep, loss of consciousness and death very peacefully - a blessing for a woman always phobic about cancer! Why it happened, who knows - she was nearly 82, nothing linked to alcohol or anything... I think 'The Big Guy' wants her for something else...
My Dad is going to be more than bereft...she was his oxygen and blood, his food and water - literally. No one else got a look in....
I am on my way back there today but trying to wangle a hotel to be near, but not in, that house, at least at night - the nightmares (as of childhood, were waking me up sweating - horrible)...wish me luck with explaining why the hotel without saying anything!
I know you'll be sending good vibes and I am really (presumptiously!) grateful...I'll get here when I can but think of everyone here too....and trusting that healing and kindness ease any current MWO cuts and grazes...and that courage and strength fill anyone really struggling with the beastly fire-water....etc etc etc
Hugs all round.
FMS-TLS (Finding My Self - Temporarily Lost Somewhere...)
My Mum died last night at 7.15pm....5 minutes after I walked back in the door of home, 7 hours away, to recharge my batteries for 48 hours and try and Find My Self again after 10 days of just me and my Dad in the house I grew up in and was so, so, so unhappy in....
It's been a long, long 10 days and today I am going back for another 10.... I am so going to try and find some sort of Internet connection but so hope that if I am able to, I find MWO in a happier 'state' than I came back to - not well chosen words at all and sorry if they offend at all, but I just feel sad about this 'energy blip'; this place so to special. Let's hope all is resolved soon?
My Mum deteriorated steadily after her 'sort of stroke' (not a 'bleed' but a lack of oxygen from a near total heart block...pulse went down to 12...) and although nobody really knows (or says), it seems to have been ARDS (acute respiratory distress syndrome) where her body couldn't utilize oxygen despite it being pumped in at max and everything just closed down.
This meant she just slipped into sleep, loss of consciousness and death very peacefully - a blessing for a woman always phobic about cancer! Why it happened, who knows - she was nearly 82, nothing linked to alcohol or anything... I think 'The Big Guy' wants her for something else...
My Dad is going to be more than bereft...she was his oxygen and blood, his food and water - literally. No one else got a look in....
I am on my way back there today but trying to wangle a hotel to be near, but not in, that house, at least at night - the nightmares (as of childhood, were waking me up sweating - horrible)...wish me luck with explaining why the hotel without saying anything!
I know you'll be sending good vibes and I am really (presumptiously!) grateful...I'll get here when I can but think of everyone here too....and trusting that healing and kindness ease any current MWO cuts and grazes...and that courage and strength fill anyone really struggling with the beastly fire-water....etc etc etc
Hugs all round.
FMS-TLS (Finding My Self - Temporarily Lost Somewhere...)
c: :heart:
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