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hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

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    hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

    hi ..lets start well its hard to say but at times i am confused.sad ,angrey,so f--king frustated.not because i cant drink . but what life bring my way.here i am with the women i love . and at times am not happy.and i have to treat her like a baby doll. i dont mind but it so hard to sleep in the same bed and not be able to touch her in the way.i want to am so afraid of hurting her .but that just 1 part of it. my kids i talk to my yuongest one. but my oldest wont let me in his life . he is 16 and he think he knows it all . i am so worry about him.i know it take time but. how much time does it take.they live in a bad part of town. and just pray that nothing happens to him.but as of being without al . i think alot more and deeper then i have ever done.and for me it is all about control . i have come to understand that. i am the only one that can make the change in my life . to be able to live the way i want to . and yes today i can say . i am happy. but wanting more. so for now all i want and wish is to be happy :wings::groupluv::wave:
    :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
    best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

    #2
    hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

    Thanks for sharing. It must be very difficult, but I believe it will get better.
    Goal 1: Today
    Goal 2: Tomorrow

    Comment


      #3
      hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

      Hi TLGRS: Keep up the good work. 132 days AF... WOW! You and I chatted a couple of weeks ago. At the time I told you and a few others that I was going to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. As you know, I slipped after 7 months and 3 weeks. My God, did I ever feel so awful for doing that. Aside from the hangover, I was disappointed because my 7 plus months have been terrific. I was empowered. I felt strong and felt capable of handling whatever it is that life throws my way. It took me about 4 days to start feeling good again. We all deal with tough situations in life. God gives you only what you can handle. I truly believe in that. Hang tight.... Keep going... You sound like a truly great person...Everything will work out for you. -Reenie
      September 23, 2011

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        #4
        hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

        Thanks T!! You are such a bright spot on this site. Are your gf's health issues improving? And your son, it may take a long time, but just let him know you still want to be in his life. In the end , that wil count. my dad has played almost no part in my life, but you are going to do better than that
        :boxer: Get the hell out of my house, Al, you worthless bastard!!

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          #5
          hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

          thank you all

          i know god keep on testing me in everyway. and i'm staying strong . and i know if i went back to my old ways. i wouldnt be the only one losing.my family and friends would lose too.so here i am writing down my thoughts. and am not worry about anyone reading this anymore . my gf knows how i feel and we are talking and being more open with each other this is my way out.things will get better how long no one can say. but for today i'm feeling great . and its not easy but if life was that easy we would have nothing to work for .and to all who read this where there a way. there is a way out and am still working on mind it might take a life time. but it will be my life time without al...............PS again thank you all :thanks::b&d::wavin:
          :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
          best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

          Comment


            #6
            hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

            tlrgs - wow - 132 days. I'm inspired. But more than that I'm certain. Certain that this has to be a daily walk. Not looking beyond them moment we've been given. Not looking beyond the joy of the morning sun - our Kids eyes on us - how we are living. Today I woke up Sober. And I was tired. And I thought - If this is all the better it get's ... than .... well - it's a lot better than it was 2 months ago when I was filled with fear, anger, disgust, lust for a numbing drink to push all the reality away before I could start my day.

            Will we feel better 132 days from now? I don't know. But I do know if we return to drinking we sure will feel 10 x's worse than we do right now. So - if this is as good as it gets -- I'm buying. I hope you buy too.

            Love you so and you have been a bright spot for me every time I see your avatar. I mean that from the bottom of my lil ol heart!
            liv
            AF since Jan. 1, 2008 .... It all began right here


            Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice, you made it now.


            (from the Movie "Once")

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              #7
              hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

              I think you are doing great, tlrgs. Stay focused on being in control....things are much easier AF.

              Don

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                #8
                hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

                WOW, great success...keep it up

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                  #9
                  hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

                  I can't wait to post how I feel at 132 days....only 131 to go.
                  "We all have a better guide in ourselves, if we would attend to it, than any other person can be." Jane Austen

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                    #10
                    hi there.the way i feel at 132 days

                    Holy shit!!!!!!!! 132 days?? That's incredible!!!!! Great job!!!!!!!!!!!!!
                    Noelle sez "Do want you like, like what you do. Life is Good."

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