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    #16
    I am so ashamed and apologize

    Luv - Glad to see you back. We are all in this together, we grow or fall as a community, and you ARE a part of this community....best wishes to you.
    The furture lies before you like newly fallen snow - be careful how you tread it, for every step will show.

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      #17
      I am so ashamed and apologize

      Amen, Tk...Amen.

      Love, Me
      :l
      Alcohol is simply the device between success and failure.

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        #18
        I am so ashamed and apologize

        Luv Know what u mean I'm about to loss mine so all I can say is hang in there buddy.

        Kimbo XXXXXXXXXXX
        Yesterday I dared to struggle. Today I dare to win!!

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          #19
          I am so ashamed and apologize

          Lisa, I was very worried about you. Quite frankly I was worried loosing this site might have been the final straw for you. So happy to see that you are up and about taking charge of your life again. I do think the world of you, just know your not alone in your struggling. I am right there with you. Spring arrives this week, it is a time of renewal, why don't we both take it as our fresh start and put this bleak winter behind us?
          Hugs
          M

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            #20
            I am so ashamed and apologize

            Mar. I have been trying and trying to call you.......

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              #21
              I am so ashamed and apologize

              I'm so relieved to see you moving forward Luv... Please just know that everybody here wants only the best for you.. xxx Big Hugs xxx

              ~ I hear a whinny on the wind~

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                #22
                I am so ashamed and apologize

                luv....love you and wishing you my very best. Sorry you are hurting so much.

                hugs.....
                Gabby :flower:

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                  #23
                  I am so ashamed and apologize

                  hey girlie. well you know sisters have to have each others backs no matter what. and personally i've offended a ton of people while drinking. is that some kind of strange phenomenon? i mean i certainly don't condone it god knows...... i don't at all sound or act like the same one when drunk and crazy. so thank god i'm 77 days sober. .but honey, does a one of us when crocked can we say that we are so high and mighty? i don't think so. you under the influence is just a really good reminder as to why it is a good idea to be sober. and i'm so happy that we are going to be sober girlies together. i'm counting the days til you get to go whoop whoop to lenair.whoop and i love barry for doing ol barbie and you that special dealio and getting you in early. they are the bestest. so i don't know. some people are going to be upset. and i guess honey those are the folks that have never offended anyone while drinking. and god bless em. cuz that would not be how i behaved while i was plastered and awnry.
                  so takes a really gutsy gal to say she's sorry and takes a gutsy gal to say i accept. and though i'm never going to be offended by you. i accept. and you just know that i know who you are and not one stupid drop of alcohol is going to change my impression of you not now and not ever. and i'm happy the kids are coming home this weekend. yip yip yip... and i'm so happy we walk hand in hand together. so remember a long time ago i wrote that poem for you.... that we could walk hand in hand together and dip our toes in the sand..... member that???? i'll see if i can find it here somewhere and post for you again so you can see it..... so for now, sister, chin up. you've done the right thing. now pick up that self worth, drop off self loathing, and guilt and shame at the corner and let it go. you have your self care to now do... and you are the one you need to be focused on.. this site will take care of itself. these are grown people. and whether or not they get over last week or weeks is entirely up to them. as they say in one of my favorite programs. all you can do luv honey is sweep your side of the street.... the rest is none of your business. now put that pretty head back up. and all 110 lbs of me is going to come running over there and give you a big ol bootsie hug.......
                  and there darling by the grace of my scrawny butt go I. let me not cast a stone anywhere.... bootsie girl
                  :welcome:

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                    #24
                    I am so ashamed and apologize

                    I have surely missed a lot here and need to catch up but don't you dare go anywhere sweetie.
                    :h:h:h
                    Sunny days, sweeping the, clouds away. On my way, to where the air is sweeeet!!! Can you tell me how to get, how to get to......LOL

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                      #25
                      I am so ashamed and apologize

                      I FOUND IT... I WROTE THIS TO YOU ON THE LUV THREAD ON OCTOBER 30.... SO I'M PUTTING IT HERE FOR YOU TO READ AGAIN....... I LOVE YOU


                      hi luv bug i wanted to post this here as it is really about our family and i wanted to share it with you and family. please go to your thread though as it is from your panic and about mama. but you had asked before to write a poem about us all and family. well it occured to me this is it. so here goes
                      IN RESPONSE TO MAGIC
                      ah to the moon magic. i often think you know we spend so much time trying to hang on to something that we can't simply hang on to and grieve the inevitability of what is. i feel in my heart you know the inevitable sadness more comes from all the moments that i want to capture into a genie bottle of how much love pours from my heart for those i hold so close and wish to god i could hold them even closer, smell, touch, feel, yell, more time, more time. wish the moments could drag on for ever of the simple times, the smiles, the coffee in the morning, the simple ways we wake, play, enjoy each other, scratch your childrens head, play with the animals, it isn't really the big moments in life, the hole in one at golf, it was all the small moments in life that i wanted to capture into that bottle all the really small moments, the ones i didn't even capture always on film, you know the motorcycle rides, that perfect sunset, manicures, holding your mom's hand while going to the dr., the dreams we have shared or even the ones that never came true, wish i could capture those little moments in a bottle and open it up from time to time and replay them for us so we could laugh and cry about it for eternity. i suppose this short little life just offers up so many opportunities to just share our little fragile hearts. and the rage and sadness comes from the times i let that moment escape and used instead to get caught up in busyness, pettiness or deadness or stupid stuff that never mattered or being pissed off about nothing or wasting it with people that never mattered anyway. so today again luv we just grab a blanket, light a candle, and we hold on to those that matter and we just grab on to that moment take our shoes off and dig our little toes into the sand on the beach and we walk hand in hand on this path with all of our pitiful but meaningless failures and our meaningless faults and we love each other because we can. guess reflection will do that for you. makes you know that you can just see that all of it is about our connections and our ability to smile at each other, lend a hand, know that each of us matters, each of us is trying, your mama is trying, you are trying. and for whatever simple reason, god or universe or divine insanity experiment said hey let's create this forum for us to communicate so we can share this path together.
                      so i'm digging my toes in the sand, reaching my little hand out, knowing that i can feel yours in mine, sister (s) brother bear, dave too lol, and we see the beauty in the first breath as well as the last breath in us all. and the precious moments in between. somewhere in all of this lies the poetry. the pain gives you the capacity to love and feel and i pray you feel so deeply down to your soul and mine. because only then does our hearts crack open so wide that we can love so purely, we can forgive even our sisters, our brothern for they can do nothing but what they know. pitiful i know but there for the grace of god go i. so let the fire burn in your heart and let it rage through you and scream at the moon and let yourself feel my sister. and grab my hand and let's at least for now walk and dig our toes in to the sand. i can't run yet but i can walk. and we will all light candles and we will walk this path together. amen

                      love bootsie
                      __________________
                      :welcome:

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                        #26
                        I am so ashamed and apologize

                        Going to Lenair April 10-14..thanks to BOOTSIE

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                          #27
                          I am so ashamed and apologize

                          LUV.....that is tremendous news.

                          I am proud of you for being so brave.

                          Lisa is there~ waiting for you.

                          m. xxx
                          ~Are you looking for the Holy One?
                          I am in the next seat.
                          My shoulder is against yours. ~Kabir

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                            #28
                            I am so ashamed and apologize

                            I don't know what you said, but I am sure that all is forgiven. If there is anyone around that understands doing stupid things when under the influence, well it is this bunch!!!

                            Hang in there sweetie and stay with us!!!!

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                              #29
                              I am so ashamed and apologize

                              The first stone

                              Hey bootsie

                              That was such a great post you wrote, you know about not casting the first stone. I am a true believer in that. i am really impressed with what you wrote and thankful too.

                              And Luv: I wish you luck at lenair. But don't forget you were having a lot of success on topa. I thought you found the solution....

                              good luck to everyone!

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                                #30
                                I am so ashamed and apologize

                                Great to hear from you LUV.

                                Lxx
                                Rather die standing, than live on my knees, begging Please..... No More.......

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