Depressed

[janka]

Hello to all, sorry to bother. But I feel depressed now, even though AF for some time. This divorce thing is so stressful, and I got anti-depressants which seemed to be working. Don't want to fall down from all of this, need to ignore these feelings and be constructive, just having a hard time today. Any ideas would be super helpful, j

[Guest]

Depressed

Hi Janka, I can relate to what you are going through. I'm going through one myself and it's not fun in anyway. I was watching this movie the other day. The one with Jennifer Aniston and Kevin Costner; the based on 'The Graduate'...I can't remember the name of it right now. But her grandmother (who was Ms. Robinson) told Jennifer that "you've never truly lived until you've gone through a divorce"...and that has been the truest statement I have heard in a long time.

I'm trying to find ideas myself; I'll try cooking a new dish, getting a new book, take my dogs outside, play with my baby more than normal, play with my computer programs and print off pictures and frame them of happy times with my baby, talk to my best friend always helps...but, there are those days that come up on you and no matter what, you're just not prepared for it.

I'm here if you always want to PM me. ((big hugs to you))

[Ripple]

Depressed

janka;293351 wrote: Hello to all, sorry to bother. But I feel depressed now, even though AF for some time. This divorce thing is so stressful, and I got anti-depressants which seemed to be working. Don't want to fall down from all of this, need to ignore these feelings and be constructive, just having a hard time today. Any ideas would be super helpful, j

its okay janka, cleaning up all the shit stinks. Plan on a nice Divorce cake and celebrate! Look on the bright side another accomplishment towards freedom! :h

Florida Divorce & Family Law Blog: A Divorce Cake

[Mags]

Depressed

Janka dear, I am literally running out of the door as I type this. But I have to say a quick Keep Your Chin Up. I know this is tough, I know.

Let me send a hug to you for today. I'll catch you later this afternoon.
:l:l:l

[bald headed old guy]

Depressed

Janka!
Hang in there! You know you are doing the right thing, and I'm glad you went to the dr and got some AD's! Those will I hope help you through this hell!
You'r right to come here and talk with us, you helped me and I believe others as we got onboard here and started to sort out our lives. Now, it's time fo us to be here for you as you sort out your life! PM me anytime!
BHOG

[lukalee]

Depressed

Janka, I speak from experience here. Don't ignore your feelings; they will just creep up later and bite you in the butt. It's ok to be sad, and it is really healthy to sit down and have a good cry. Write a letter to yourself stating all of your feelings and frustrations and throw it in a fire. Do anything to release those feelings. We are not happy all the time; this is natural. But as drinkers, we are so used to numbing the pain. We must now find healthy ways to rid ourselves of the anguish. You will get through this; I know you will. We are all here for you. HUGS

[retteacher]

Depressed

Janka: I too have been upset & depressed the past few days. I have a few personal crises going on. I'm so used to getting through these things numbed out that actually feeling these emotions is even more painful...perhaps because I'm not used to doing it. Yesterday, I would love to have dived into a bottle of wine but didn't. I went to an Alanon meeting instead, & that helped. Today, the difficult situations in my life are still the same, but I stayed sober & don't have to feel guilty & ashamed today. I don't need regret for drinking on top of everything else. Good luck Janka. Love, Mary

[My New Beginning]

Depressed

Janka, sorry to hear you are down. It'll be ok. Going through divorce is no picnic, I know from experience. It's extremely hard to stay focused. Try to be strong and you will get through this. You have alot of support here. Come back often.
Hugs and good thoughts to you.
Greenhouse

[hart]

Depressed

((((((((Janka))))))))))))

Luv ya hon :l hang in there, hope to catch you on chat.

[Accountable for Me]

Depressed

Janka, I had no idea you were going through a divorce. I remember a while back you were contemplating it. You are doing amazing with staying sober, and, divorce is no picnic - that is for sure. You will be going through many emotions, but you will be happier in the long run. (at least that is how I feel at the moment about my own situation). Hang in there!

[janka]

Depressed

Thanks everyone, this is so very difficult even though the man is generally nasty, has always been ... I should be relieved and am in some ways ... but the financial strain will be terribly oppressive especially on the kids. I am afraid and he blames a lot of this on drinking, but this impossible situation in our marriage preceded my drinking long before. I have been suffering from anxiety and then depression for a very long time and know I medicated myself and do not want to go there ever again. I have been "alone" throughout most of this marriage and isolated myself with drinking and overwork for maybe 5 years. I just feel lousy and hope this passes. Thanks for your help, j

[Not Happy Hour-Happy Life]

Depressed

Janka,
I'm sorry to hear about your divorce- looking back on my divorce, it was almost like grieving for something that I lost, you know? Luka's right- a good cry will clean the soul, because no matter how horrible things may have been, there were good times, too. Go ahead and mourn, pretty Janka, because you need to. :l

And you're right about the hubby's fingerpointing match: the next time he blames it on your drinking, point back at any part of his anatomy that you choose, and blame it on that!!!
(Umm, his nose because he snores.... his stomach because he eats like a pig.... his smelly feet.... :H)

Take care of you, Janka~
Much cuckoo love, :heart:

[Cinders]

Depressed

Janka,

I am bumping this thread back up because I saw you online.

Are you feeling better? Is the Anti-D helping?

Just know I am sending you lots of love and caring. I know what a difficult time this is but I also know he has been a huge part of your emotional rollercoaster.

Once past the divorce, even if it is a financial downturn, I am willing to bet you are going to feel so much better and so much freer. Money and status quo are not good things if the person you are mated to does not love and care for you as he should.

Love,
Cindi

[KateH1]

Depressed

Hey Janka,
I can relate so well to your story. My ex blaimed the end of our marriage on my drinking. He is a narcissist and for years, I was the supermom, super executive, super chef etc etc. He was verbally abusive and loved to shove me around. So, after 16 years of this, I started drinking a glass or two of wine.......which came first, the chicken or the egg? The answer is clear. No, drinking was not the answer, but divorce sure as heck was!

Janka, you are creating a better life for you and your children. You are doing so well will being sober......This sadness and worry will take care of itself...........I promise!

XXXX Kate

[bald headed old guy]

Depressed

Janka,
You are one very stong person, and you did not make this decision lightly; and you did make it with a clear head. It will work out for the better!
As for your children, they will at some point in the come up to you and say, "Mom, I am glad you did this. Life IS better now." Children are generally not as obsessed with things that money can by as we think they are. Plus, janka, they do see what goes on..they are not blind. They just don't know what can be done about it.
We are all here to support you!
Stay Strong!
BHOG