trying to finish as much as i can on her sisters house .
yeah it has taken alot longer then i thought.
but good things come to those who take their time and do things right .
and also going to doc appt and taking time off to be with her .
and for myself
well today there was one thing that has been on my mind for awhile.
getting passed the 6 month mark and it is monday april 21.
but tomorrow i am going to celebrate with my home group. yes AA
and also as usual come here to my way out and read and chat and post .
but there is one thing i wanted . is for my two sons to be there .
at that meeting to support me there . well i ask and they turn me down .
yeah at first i was really hurt and i wanted to say fuck it . but then i realize.wait i didnt do this for them . i did it for me and to be at this point to realize how to do things right .man in the pass i wouldnt been a total ass hole about things . but i can handle it the right way think about in the right way .if you would have seen me 6 months ago .you would have try to go on the other side of the road .i was mean i didnt give a fuck about them , myself or my girlfriend. i wished i was dead.
but here i am living life my way .on life term. i found the inner beauty of so many thing around me i have come so far in a short time and the ride is not over .
this bull of life . is always there and i know what he or she looks like and today just for today i can say no thank you am good .and to be able to look at my sons the way i look at them now i know they love me and . this is my battle. and there are something we have to do alone .. these are called test
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