THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

[happydog]

Ok today i have a Holy Communion party to go to. It will start about 4pm onwards to late!
the thing is its next door, other wise i would of been doing the driving.
I'm 20days AF... people always say we need a plan so mind is:
To take a bottle of AF wine with me.
If im struggling to come on here for support. (only next door)
If i need fresh air to take the dog for a walk.
If someone pressure me....when saying the word NO, MEAN IT,AND STICK TO IT.
I hope im not over reacting. just getting a bit worried.

I would like some other people experience on mwo how they have handle the situation when going out were there are lots of people around with drinks in there hands, any other advice PLEASE would HELP ME A LOT..... This is a big test for me, if i get through this it would mean more to me then 30days. If you know what i mean!

Thanks for taking your time reading this, hope it helps someone else as well.x

Love
Teardrop.x

[Guest]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Relax, take the event as it comes. It will probably go alright. I have been in 2 nightclub situations recently and both were fine - in fact seeing other people getting drunk and being in a state actually was quite a useful experience.

So, enjoy yourself and don't let the presence of AL bother you.........you can always make/take some nice coffee too. Makes a change!

[happydog]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Thanks ukblonde,
Really means a lot i will take the coffee bit on baord...I to like to go out to a nightclubs like a good dance with a drink..this will be my next hardest step for me because im always calling it of at the moment...

Thanks
Teardrop.x

[Chief]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Teardrop....

The key is to not allow The Beast to get you thinking that taking a drink IS an option.....that's all he wants to do....put that option on the table.

Well, it's not on the damn table.

You quit drinking 20 days ago. That means you quit drinking 20 days ago.....

Get control of your thinking. Think about your thinking. ANY thought that has you taking a drink are those of The Beast. Recognize these thoughts for what they are and dismiss them as nonsense......you are in control of what you do.

I think you'll find the only people who are concerned about you not drinking probably have a drinking problem, too......most "normal" people could care less whether you drink or not...

Don't make it a struggle. Don't make it hard. You are not depriving yourself of anything by not drinking......on the contrary...you are rewarding your body by not drinking....

It's all about attitude, now.......you're past the physical part. Now it's really all in your mind...

Go have a good time.......don't struggle.....there is no struggle.

Don

[flyinhigh]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

thank you chief

Teardrop, good luck today with the party you seem to have a good plan and Chief has given you and all of us some great advice here!

Thank you chief, it is a mind frame, and I needed to be reminded of that. That really resonated with me. I am rewarding myself, not depriving! Thank you!!!!!!!

[Ripple]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

hello!

The de Bono Group think of you first. i am a reward to me. the beast is wot you make it. don't let it control you...

[sweet]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Sometimes what I do in a social setting is get a coke in a short glass, and everyone thinks its a rum and coke, or some other mixed drink. I find if I do that, I don't have people giving me the third degree on why I'm not partying!!! (I'm not big into announcing my personal decision to try and mod/quit)
Just think how proud you will be of yourself when the party is over, and you didn;t give in. Or that you will not wake up with a major hangover and hope you didn't say something stupid at the party!!!:goodjob:

[rustop61]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Hi Teardrop

Lots of good advice here which I mean to keep in mind for my communtion tomorrow. Good luck, you can do it. You have come so far, this is just another step along the way.

Rustop

[Thankful]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Teardrop ~ Congrats on those 20 days! That's motivation enough to keep you AF!

I take a different approach than most people here. I just tell them why I'm not drinking if they ask. I know not many people here are a fan of that, but it's so liberating and I don't have all that worry of what am I going to say and no worrying whose gonna notice I'm not drinking, etc. You see, if you act like it's not a big deal than so will other people. "I don't drink anymore, thank you though, but I'll take a diet coke if you got it?" Easier than you think. Just shrug it off matter of factly.

If you want just tell them you are on a new health kick (not a lie now is it?). Or...all parties need a good joke....just tell them you don't like to drink and drive (joke being that you are next door). Still not a lie, right?

Relax and have a good time. Just stick to your guns and don't let others dictate how you want your evening to go. If you don't want to drink, don't drink. If the pressure starts to get to you, tell the host you have a headache and need to be home. Ok, so this one might be a lie, but it's a forgiving one. You have to put yourself first.

Good luck, hun.

Love, Me
:l

[happydog]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Thank you everyone for all your advice, in replying i have printed it out so i can re -read it for later and make sure it sinks in.. Not had the urge to drink yet, but just had a argement with my neighbour to do think ot brandy),i know i need to calm down. I wil not drink even thou my neighbour does look like the beast.

Thanks
Teardrop.x

[Guest]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Just relax - remember you don't have to have a drink - it's your choice. I have been craving last night and a little today, that's only because it's Bank Holiday weekend and I know lots of folk are in the pub.

BUT

Lots of folk are NOT in the pub, nor drinking. Many are enjoying NORMAL lives without involving booze.

I am going to have a lovely meal out in the best Indian restaurant in the area. It is the only Indian I know that respects it's own religious background in not serving alcohol - they prepare pitchers of fruit juices and the yogurty stuff....think it's called lassi. It's also in a converted church so lovely and cool!

:l

[happydog]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

After this argement with my neigbour to do with the kids.. i feel like i have calm down now. just hate arguing. just cant believe this has happen, anyway im not going to worry about it. going to take the dog for a walk for fresh air before it rains.
uk that resturant sounds cool
bank hoildays is always another excuse for me to drink more then normal gong to stick to my guns.

Thanks again.x

Teardrop.x

[cmhguy3]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Great Advice from so many. Be strong Teadrop. I will be sending you a positive vibe!

[Chief]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Teardrop....who's in control?

What your neighbor does or says has nothing to do with whether you are going to drink....

Think about your thinking......are they your thoughts, or The Beast?....

Don

[happydog]

THINKING AHEAD-before the beast!

Thanks everyone,
Chief, Im in control thank you.

After taking the dog for a walk and getting fresh air, thought nothing else could go wrong, but got back and realize i lock myself out of the house. Real felt like i was being tested tonight.
Glad to be home did not touch a drop of AL and felt in control (thank god) feeling upset because my hubby blames me for whats happen with how neighbours today. I know its the drink that is talking and i know like, he said he wants to finsih it because he is drunk. Anyway he is sleeping like a baby now...
The kids are please with me, my son was a great help with his dad. thank god i was in control having two parents not in control has made me realize (it not very good.) and it could of got out of control and messy. I do think things happen for a reason!

Anyway feeling totally exhausted, so of to bed for me.

Love
Teardrop.x
p.s 21Days AF for me.