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[me145]

it amazes me how ive read some people on here say "i hide my drinking from my fiance, brother, mother, etc... People alwsys know when i drink. lol i guess some people tend to drink often, but dont get obviousally drunk?

[Muddle]

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Me too. Once I get going, I can't pace it. It is so completely obvious.

[brittzak]

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We arent hiding it......we just think we are cause we are drunk! I used to think HID it well, until I stopped and realized everybody knew.

[beatle]

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I hid it well for years, but the last 2 years it became obvious to many (though I still believed I was hiding it). Yes, I drank a little bit all day, never getting really drunk, just maintaining a kind of buzz. But that got out of my control after a while.

[Hannah]

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Beatle, Britzzak, Maisie, ME145 - When we say we are hiding it, sometimes it is because we drink privately, and alone - my family (with the exception of my hubby, and even he didn't know just HOW much), my neighbours, my friends, didn't know. I could always control it in public. Once you have alcohol on your breath, another persoon can tell you had A DRINK - but unless hyou are very obviously drunk, they can't tell if you have had more than one, really - and that is how you hide it. Many alcoholics are very good at this.

Beatle, your drinking a little bit at a time over the course of the day - sounds like my Mom. From about 2:00 in the afternoon, she always has a glass of wine at her elbow. Drinks it VERY slowly, a sip at a time - but it's always there. She used to drink quite a bit over the course of a day - when I was younger, living at home, by the time I came in in the evening after a date, she would be slurring her words. I notice she has slowed down some, don't think she drinks more than a few glasses these days....but I know she is still "hooked" because a few years ago when she had some pretty major surgery, and was pretty much out of it for a few weeks, the doctors said her twitching so much even when asleep was because of withdrawal symptoms. My Dad was somewhat taken aback at this, I think he just didn't want to admit it to himself. But, I wasn't surprised.

[LindaP]

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HIDING IT

Hi
I tried to hide it for years and the joke was that everyone knew. I've just spoken to my ex-partner and he said the night I met him I stank of booze. I always thought that no matter how much I had drunk I always acted and sounded sober. How silly is that - you have half a bottle of vodka and you're still sober!

When I worked I used to go out at lunchtime with my then partner and we would have two bottles of wine between us followed by large brandies and then I used to go back to work. He was an alcoholic and I didn't recognise that I was one so as far as I was concerned I had just joined a lovely party.

The thing is that nobody ever said you're drunk, either socially or at work. Why did nobody say?

I've now been sober for 16 days and I feel great and I don't want to go back in to the viscious circle - drink - be ill - feel well - drink again. I'm sick of starting sobriety again and again. Hopefully, this time will be the last. I don't know if I will be able to moderate but I did have a couple of glasses of wine on Friday. But it was in a different atmosphere - I wasn't alone at home I was with friends - it was a social event.

Good luck to every one who reads this and I hope to hear from you.

Linda

PS : This site is so great and being in contact with people who understand and don't judge is a great relief.

[cedar]

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I hid drinking all the time ! At home i would hid the wine bottle/s and then put wine into coffee cups...just in case someone turned up be it my partner of friend.
I drank while i drove my car , I would hide the bottle under my seat and put wine into water bottles so i could sip away.

Here we can buy wine in boxes varing from 500ml - 5l so generally i would buy the 500ml of 1litre which i could then fold up and throw away when empty. I do know my partner was aware that I did this 'occassionally' but there is no way he knew how much. I also drank enough to buzz but not enough to make a tit of myself, but that didnt always work according to plan. On anyone day I could go through any thing from 500ml to 1.5 litres, the latter being more the norm...

I am on day 8 AF, my rules to myself were NO more secret drinking, NO more drinking alone... SOMEHOW I am sticking to this with the help of MWO !!

Interestingly, keeping those rules i have not had a drink even when there have been occassion with groups of friends. I feel so free and happy !

[Tiny]

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As you can see by my avatar I am a party girl ... but lately it is just me and my two dogs... pretty pathetic huh? I hide oit pretty well from my boyfriend... today I will be AF...

[greeneyes]

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No mater what is on my desk, even bottled water, hubby takes a sip. I doubt that he is that thirsty. Just checking. My hall monitor. Gotta love him.

[retteacher]

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I was (emphasis past tense) a secret drinker. I'm sure I went overboard at times & people noticed, but I don't think even my husband of 36 years knew how much I drank. I've been here at mwo for a little over a year & have had 2 long AF runs w/some slips & relapses in between. Right now, I'm 3 days sober. I think the hiding:
-secret places.
-drinking out of coffee mugs.
-replacing bottles.
-disposing of empties.
was the most soul-destroying part of my drinking.

I'm bound & determined to become a non-drinker. Unfortunately I've tried countless times to mod & just cannot do it.

Mary

[greeneyes]

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Yes, it is soul destroying. Once someone asked me did I hide it. She had addiction training. I said No, because at that time I did not. She said good because when you do that, it takes it onto a whole new level. Guess what, she was right. I can't believe I put this in print but if it helps someone, good.

[retteacher]

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Green: I'm glad you put it in print. Yes, when I hid my drinking, that's when I started polishing off bottles all by myself. I need to say this in order to keep myself from falling back into denial. Mary

[dexterhead]

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Thanks Mary ... yes, it is "soul destroying." You are so wise.:h