15 years ago this month

[jay42]

for candace

what alarms ring?
when you crashed into my arms
oh,what did the days say ?
when the desparate hours rang down
prehaps,
hold onto your shoe or the forgetton seams of jeans run down
-
are you crying now?
im pale beside the phone
so , far from me
im still the strange boy
weaving magic into
this love
thier is no reason why
we,
got drunk on alcohol
visting places we never travelled
-
now
i sit in some cafe
shell shocked on the way
life is never easy
we all go alone , i know
-
my
spirit will never be bound to one point of view
so , dont despise me
i, just deflect mysel
till love again comes my way JL0

[betty boop]

15 years ago this month

Jay, please try not to let your hurt turn into a drinking session ........

[brittzak]

15 years ago this month

Jay,
I do not know what happened to Candace, but I have had a lot of loss too....we COULD drink ourselves in to a stupor....which I have done, OR you can pick your ass up and live. NOT EASY....life is freakin hard, ok! But, I KNOW it is so much harder drunk as a freaking lunatic. You can chose life or death, your choice. Candace is gone, for what ever reason....Billy is gone from me, now my mama, countless friends recently, but as a good friend told me....DEATH HAPPENS, these things are not a direct hit to break us down. Learn to live through trial, TRIUMPH!!!!! I had to seek help and i am going to Lenair next month, whatever the hell it takes! DO IT!!!!!!!

[lukalee]

15 years ago this month

Jay,
You have a true gift of reaching out to Candace through your poetry. I truly feel many of us have horrible guilt when a loved one passes away-myself included. If only I did this, or didn't do that. If my thoughts were something different...or I did more of that, and the list goes on and on.
I do feel that those who have gone before us look upon us and think, "Those poor souls for being so petty. "
I know this may sound bad, but what has really helped me is the realization that everyone must die. There is no revenge from God; there is no saving of one person and not another. The hard part is for those left here to feel the pain.
Hold on to the memories and continue with the poetry. Hugs.

[jay42]

15 years ago this month

hi and thanks for the responses . i have moved on but it helps to get my emotions out through poetry.oh and im not drinking thanks again

[happydog]

15 years ago this month

Hi jay,

What a lovely poem, Im glad you can express your emotion through portry it helps. im sure candace is there in spirit.

wish i could do that.

Lukalee you hit the nail on the head it so ture, The hard part is for those left here to feel the pain. It takes time and Only time can tell !

Love
Teardrop.x

[AMELIA]

15 years ago this month

Jay, I too think your poem is beautiful.
I think it is amazing too that Candace inspires you so much that you would write a poem 15 years after she passed away (I presume that's what your title meant). That is really lovely. Good to see your not drinking.
x

[Guest]

15 years ago this month

Jay, it's really good to hear you are not drinking. It's hard enough as it is, without the depression of alcohol.

Your poetry is beautiful, and I'm sure Candace is looking down on you with nothing but love.

[Niblet]

15 years ago this month

Jay, thanks for sharing this part of your life with us... I feel blessed to have you bring this to our table and expose all these emotions... I'm really relieved to see that you aren't drinking my friend... Please know that we all dearly love you and care about you and your wellbeing.
Take Good Care, and be well, Hugs xxx

[Muddle]

15 years ago this month

Well said, Britzak. I agree life "is so much harder drunk as a freaking lunatic." That's me when I drink. I've used my losses as a justification to drink, but AL only adds more layers of complication. It doesn't diminish the hurt. I just need to keep reminding myself . . .

[Cinders]

15 years ago this month

Jay,

A beautiful poem of love.

Thank you for sharing.

Love,
Cindi