maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

[brittzak]

As much as I am tired of drinking, I am SICK and tired of thinking about it. I want the thoughts of alcohol to go away. I don't want to think, I am 21 day af today, 22 today, 23 today.............I just want to be AF and not count the days as counting makes me feel like at any time, I will fail. Does anyone else feel this way? Maybe it is just me????

[Accountable for Me]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

LOL! I posted this in the Monthly Abs thread back in early 2007.

The counting completely ABSORBS you, doesn't it? It literally drove me insane! After about 70ish days, I said 'f' it. I am not counting anymore. WELL, I still counted............ all the way to 5+ months when I ended up having two glasses of red wine. Then I continued to count.

I am with you tho - I get really sick of it too. Now I am smoke and alcohol free and counting AGAIN. LIKE WTF? I don't plan on doing either again, so why the obsession?

I can't wait until I go back to work on Monday. LOL.

[toughintexas]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

Bear told me once you have to "surrender", and quit fighting it, that you can't control the uncontrollable....if you don't believe in the Big Guy upstairs to take care of the problem for you, then maybe you can find something else to turn it over to....I really do pray every morning, and night, and sometimes in betw., that God will take this burden from me, that'll I'll promise to do my part, if he'll please look at healing me from it...I know he can...we can't fight it mentally, emotionally tho...we do have to be aware, but we can't be obsessive, I think it gives the AL too much power over us...probably doesn't make a bit of sense tho huh.....I agree tho, we can't spend every second with it foremost on our minds, that's why it helps me tons to do other things, or, I've found lately, as soon as I start obsessing about it, I stop, and say a prayer about it, turn it over to Him....it seems to help....I just try whatever I can!

[cmhguy3]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

Glad to know I am not the only one! I thought I was a freak because counting is hard for me! I feel a lot of pressure when I do! I know I have to do the work, but I just want it behind me once and for all!

[boozehag]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

I think it is just the first 30 days that happens as they are so crucial and important to us all. I was willing each day along and thinking about it all the time. I am now coming up to 60 days and I dont really count any more except that I know I started on 1st April so it will be 60 at end of month. I still think about drinking but not in the same way as before I think more about not drinking rather than drinking. If that makes any sense. Keep up the good work.
BH

[WA]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

Yes me too...Im as frightened as hell because I know baby beets keeps me going..what when there is only me to consider....hoping things will be better by then...xxx
Jacqui xxx

[Accountable for Me]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

jacqui - be very vigilant when 'baby beets' is born. Watch for signs of post-partum depression. I wish I had of! I didn't drink with either pregnancies, but after the second one, I drank a lot to cope with the post-partum. You have a 'one up' on a lot of us. These boards provide so much education and support, so I think you may just be OK!

TIT - you are so right! We must surrender and try not to control the uncontrollable. AL definitely does not deserve this much power or energy. Thank you for the reminder!

[Ripple]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

to think how booze has messed my life up, i cannot wait until i am MORE OVER it! The farther away (TIME SOBER) the better it gets...giving in makes it so much worst..Britt, the mind plays games on us..believe me, i am living proof wot this sh*t can do...I HEAR YA! :l

[sammys]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

I know exactly what you are talking about, sick of drinking thats how we all got here and then sick of thinking about drinking, hearing about drinking, on and on. I think it means you are changing and good will come of it. It is a journey that is for sure.

Sammys

[WA]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

Im sick of it...all my streth to go af for my family...then the bastard leaves me...I would laugh but not in the mood ,sorry
JACQUI

[greeneyes]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

That is exactly why I am going to Lenair. I quit smoking 12 years ago. Don't consider it. But I also have a deep down awareness that if I have a puff it is only a matter of time. Alcohol is somehow different. It is so much work. Work, work, work. AL is always hiding behind the door for the ambush. Someone gave my daddy a minibottle of scotch and he said he didn't want it and for me to take it it. We used to drink scotch together. I thought Oh goodie! and brought it home and hid it like a dog burying a bone. I didn't drink it, but I know where it is buried. I want to not think about AL like I do not think about cigs. So yeah, I understand.

[Mags]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

Brittzak

Those thoughts do go away with time. The more time you have under your belt, the more they fade. I can't say that they ever completely disappear, but they become very remote and you do gain power over them with time.

One thing that Bear taught me (he taught me so much) is to embrace my sobriety with joy. Try not to think of what you are missing or giving up. Think of what joy you are gaining.

[brittzak]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

I am with Greenie, this is why I am going to Lenair . I want the THOUGHT gone. I have went months..8 months once, and it was a freaking struggle each damn day. I got tired of fighting myself. Can you argue with yourself???? HAND UP, I have had more arguments with myself than with others!

[tlrgs]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

yeah i would love to stop thinking about al and hearing the whine that comes with it .
but it will always be there .you stop thinking and you will let your guard down and slip. so for me yeah i think about it everyday but it doesnt have me. i have it under control and use that though to better myself.
to learn and what even if you go to rehab , take drugs to help with the craving .unless you really want it . nothing will change . you have to really want it . that is the only way it will work .

sorry if this offend anyone dont mean to.
just my point of view

[brittzak]

maybe just me, but do you just get sick of it????

Oh we all WANT it, we wouldn't be here if not.. I'd still be drinking myself silly everyday. AND PLEASE, I think we are beyond the offensive state at this point. I have offended people I LOVE much less a bunch of strangers in cyber space.