Bottom Theory

[FloridaBoy]

Bottom Theory

retteacher;336317 wrote: I'm not looking back. I absolutely do not need to go any lower. I don't want to just exist. I want to have a joyous life. Thank you everyone for sharing.

Another bottom for me: Pushing through life w/a hangover. I was a functional alcoholic. Now, I don't want to just function...I want to live. Mary

Mary,

I was a functional drunk too...and I hated it. What I am finding is that each day I am AF makes life look a lot better and I really feel alive. You will too.

FB

[rudemama]

Bottom Theory

Mary, I have been thinking about this subject alot lately. I am not sure what rock bottom is or how deep it is, but I do know I don't want to keep on a path of hiding and lying....what the hell so much energy. I have gone deeper thean i ever thought I would go. i think the laying down the shovel is where i am know. I hope at least. i know it is up to me. but i know I can't drink like a normal person no way no how.thank you all for being here and sharing your stories. rudemama

[retteacher]

Bottom Theory

I love that I can make the decision to stop now before my life gets worse. I want it to get better. Mary

[YoungAtHeart]

Bottom Theory

I lived at my bottom for about two years. I functioned, but I was socially isolated, and just managed to do my work and be a mom. I had a few short attempts at sobriety. I wasn't getting worse, but I wasn't getting better either. When I finally quit, it wasn't that big of a deal. I just did it ODAT, and promised to try my best. I refused to think about forever because that would have scared me back into drinking. I think for me, it was the ongoing erosion of my self-respect that did it for me, as well as the fear that I was digging an early grave for myself. Those things were my bottom.

As ever, Mary, thanks for a thought-provoking thread.

[greeneyes]

Bottom Theory

I am too...... ashamed?.....embarassed? ....to tell. I guess when I called Barry at Lenair and made the appt. and cried during the conversation. I suspect that qualifies.

[retteacher]

Bottom Theory

Thank you all so much for your stories. I'm moving on up...one day at a time.

[Dolly Sunshine]

Bottom Theory

The lying and hiding were for sure my bottom it made me hate and doubt myself. The worst was my daughter feeling like she had to watch out for me so I wouldn't hurt myself. Kids shouldn't have to raise their parents.

[retteacher]

Bottom Theory

Dolly: The lying & hiding are my worst memories. That's no way to live. I want to live openly w/integrity. Mary

[Wolf Dreamer]

Bottom Theory

What a great thread Retteacher, it's making us reflect and it helps me with AF. My rock bottom was a week ago when I woke up knowing if I have only one more night like the last I will die. It took three days last week to recover basic functioning. Knowing I WILL loose my job, my home and probably my life if I don't stop. I want to live. Today: 4 days MOD and 1 day AF. Hang in there. :thanks:
Wolf Dreamer

[retteacher]

Bottom Theory

WD: Keep coming. The daily abs thread is very good if you're looking for support. M

[greeneyes]

Bottom Theory

:bump: I just might be there. Right now at 2:15 AM. In the doughnut hole. Unfortunately sober and thinking holy shit. The despair is incredible. I want to crawl into a hole but oops I'm already in one. Gee the anxiety thing justs wrecks me. Sorry to be such a whiney arse.

[one of 7]

Bottom Theory

my bottom was having to post on mwo because - sat there drunk - i realised i had no friends to turn to. i pushed them all away so i could drink myself into a stupor every single day/night. plus my husband left me.

pulling myself up by my bootstraps now. remembering how bad i was, and that i'm slowly getting better and that mwo was there when i needed it. people listened and responded. that meant a lot

[Bessie]

Bottom Theory

Thank you for starting this (and bumping it too) Just what I need to read after being away from MWO for a couple of days and not being able to get my daily dose of inspiration and thoughts. I've had lots of bottoms (thankfully only got the one arse though!) but none of them led to here. I think the Vinophile comment about the bottom being the place where you put down the spade is the truest for me. I just wanted out. I am still climbing out of the hole I dug. I lose my footing sometimes, other times I can't find a handhold and slip. But I am still aiming for the blue sky at the top of the pit. I can see it, I want it and when I do stop and look up at it I am inspired.

Bessie xx