Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

[cowgal]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

sorry

Eve, I just read this and am sitting here crying for your brother, as mine died of this disease 2 years ago...............ouch!:upset:

What Kate just said, the prayer, is soooooooooo true!:h

Love you, proud of you for getting through last night, gotta go wipe my eyes and get to work. I will be thinking of you today.

lots of love, and hugs.................:l:l:l:h

MA

[bestlifeldms]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

Evie,

Just sent you a PM. So happy for you that you made it through the evening! Just shows how strong you really are.

Hugs and Support,

Best

[Thankful]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

Evie, just popping in to check on you, hun. I see you are staying strong! So proud of you! I'm so glad hubby is being so supportive. Most people who don't really understand can't be supportive. I think it's great that he is.

A lot of great advise here.

Love, Me
:l

[Evie.Lou]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

I am hanging in there,I guess.We had a nice lunch together and he wanted to look at childhood pictures.That brought up alot of old feelings that in the past would have set me off.Now he has left(probably to get AL).He looks like hell and is not working,no job no money.Can not pay his child support so jail is looming over his head.i think my other brother is going to give him some work to do,atleast I hope so.He wants to have us pay him to paint,so that kinda back fired.I told him that i no longer drink and refuse to have it in the house(that should soon see him moving down the road).I feel like someone has kicked me in the gut,but I am atleast for now winning the battle with AL.I keep saying that nothing can be so bad that a drink will not make it worse.My head feels like it is going to explode.I think I will go rest cause God only knows what tonight may bring.THANKS FOR YOUR LOVE !!!! EVIE

[brittzak]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

Hang in Evie, we are all here for you!!!!!

[Mags]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

I'm so sorry Evie - I just saw this thread.

I know this must be so hard for you but you are holding up so bravely and strongly and it sounds like hubby is giving terrific support. You know of course that you must stay strong no matter how difficult it is.

But you also know that you are many many people strong because we are all here standing with you.

Best wishes to you............

[KateH1]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

I am so sorry that you are going through this. Do you think that him wanting to look at the photos was somewhat manipulative? The only reason I ask is that my sister has used all sorts of manipulation with me. She knows that our childhood is a hot point for me. Many times in the past, she has been able to manipulate me and make me feel sorry for her with such tactics.

You know Evie, your brother has had, and still has choices. He is an adult and is responsible for his actions, his support and the support of any children that he brought into the world. This is not your responsibility. Not only that, but continuing to bail him out of his own messes, only continues to enable him to act irresponsibly. Perhaps he should seriously think of rehab...just a thought.

Hang in there sweetie, you have made good choices for yourself. You have a right to live the way that you are comfortable and happy. The way that you have worked to achieve.

Best wishes,
XX Kate

[Michaela]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

You are doing GREAT!!! We are all so proud of you. I don't think I could have been so strong. Good luck and keep up the great work!

Michaela:goodjob::goodjob:

[Change]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

Oh Evie,

I am so sorry to hear what has happened to your brother...

So far, i think this is the best idea:

KateH1;339536 wrote: Perhaps you can have your brother to dinner and then offer to put he and his friend up in a hotel for the night.

Edit: I just saw that he has already arrived... You are doing well, don't give in now!

And, VERY STRONG of you to say no to al. Well done.

[Evie.Lou]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

i know that was using the family album to try to break down my defences to see if I would give him money...NO WAY!!!!!!!I would help him financally only if he needed it to get help(a rehab would be great) He still is at a place where he says that he can take it or leave it.My responce was (cant you see that it is killing you)???He is Bloated almost beyond recognition,red faced,trembling and has hep.C,uncontrolled Diabetes Etc. Etc.I do not give him long to live and he is leaving 2 beautiful children behind.There but for the grace of God,go I...LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!! EVIE

[retteacher]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

Evie: I've only read your last few responses, but I just want to tell you you're unbelievable for staying sober in the face of this visit. If you can go to an Alanon meeting, you'll learn about co-dependence. You would not be helping your brother by giving him money. That would only keep him going on this destructive path longer. If he has to go to jail for non-support, perhaps he'll get detoxed there. Also, in jail there are AA meetings. Leave this in God's hands if you can. Mary

PS: I hope this doesn't sound too advice-giving.

[Evie.Lou]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

Thank you all!!!!Mary that is what I need to hear...Maybe jail is the best thing that could happen to him.Does anyone know about a cure for hep.C ???My brother said that there is an experimental treatment but it costs 50,0000 dollars.He said that he applied to be in some rescreach program that would give him free treatment.I am not sure if he is telling the truth or if it was another plee for money?I can not imagine they would use anyone so sick for rescearch????It seems like a miricle is his only hope...LOL..Evie

[4theboyz]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

Evie,

As hards as this all is, think of yourself here first. As an outsider looking in, your brother is entirely in a bad way and even though he is your brother, that is not your fault and nor is it your responsibility to "save him". You most certainly can help him but don't do it from guilt. You did not do this to him obviously he did and is continuing to do so.

You know the answers to these difficult questions he faces, but he needs more help than just you can give him.

Be very careful here, I have seen my share of alcoholics and unfortunately addicts and if they are really hooked, they all lie. Lies that would tear out the heart of the coldest individual. But they are nothing more than desperate lies that they would even take from their own loved ones to get one more.

If I were you I'd point him in the direction of the nearest state run rehab and send him packing *PRONTO!!*

Gosh I hope this is no worse than what you a writing here, I pray for your continued strength Evie.

:lv4tb

[Noelle]

Here comes my big trigger!!!please pray...

Evie.....$50K? Sorry, but I think that's a load of BS. JMHO!