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COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

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    COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

    Hi all!
    I have a folder where I have printed out posts off of this site from the past that have really helped or encouraged me. I was looking through my folder recently and came across an article that I had printed out in 2006. An old member had posted it, and I felt it was worth posting again. It has really given me some great "ammunition" lately! Hope it will help others as well.


    Coping with Urges by Robert Westermeyer, Ph.D.

    Changing an addictive habit usually means coping with sometimes relentless urges. Urges often dominate thinking and interfere with the daily routine. Many people give up because they believe they can't function without their habit. Remember that urges, in and of themselves, are normal. We all experience craving in varying degrees every day. Because your habit has been important to you for a long time, it is unreasonable to expect urges to vanish completely. If they do, don't be surprised if they occur a month or two down the road. The "three Ds" can be helpful in coping with urges and craving, whether these urges are related to alcohol or drug use, overeating, tobacco use or any habit you are attempting to change. The Ds stand for: Decatastrophizing, Disputing expectancies, and Distracting.

    Decatastrophizing:

    Decatastrophizing Especially early in your change efforts, cravings can seem excruciating. Everything you see can remind you of your habit. If you smoke, every room you enter may bring to mind the image of a cigarette and associated pleasure. The inability to satisfy the urge can lead to frustration and inner statements like, "I can't stand this!" or "There is no way I will be able to live without giving in." "I'll just go crazy!" Statements like this can be overwhelming. Remember that urges are normal and typically decline in intensity as you continue changing. Avoid extreme adjectives like "horrible" or "unbearable." Belief in horrible extremes only makes you feel worse. Just how unbearable is your urge right now? To accurately answer, think of truly unbearable suffering. Is your current state as unbearable as getting punched repeatedly in the stomach? Bamboo shoots under your fingernails? Watching a loved one get hurt? What have you endured which was worse than your current urge? Did you survive? If so, does it follow that your urge is less than unbearable and perhaps only "very uncomfortable?"

    Disputing Expectancies:

    Disputing Expectancies Urges are, in essence, positive expectations. When we crave something, we expect it will create a pleasurable state, or reduce an unpleasant one. Urges are "myopic," they can only see advantages. You must shed some light on your craving to effectively control it. One good way to decrease the potency of an urge is to focus on its negative consequences. Ask yourself questions like: "How will I feel later if I give in to my urges?" "What consequences might I suffer if I give in?" "Will the negatives outweigh the positives in the long run if I give in?" Another way to cope with urges is to imagine that someone very close to you is having the urge. How would you convince them to resist? Separating ourselves from urges is often required to respond to them objectively. Distracting Some urges are so relentless that talking back to them doesn't work. Good old-fashioned distraction is sometimes the only medicine that can pull your thoughts away.

    Cognitive Distraction:

    Distraction can be "cognitive," in the form of some mental exercises, or "behavioral," in the form of an alternate activity. Alternate activities are usually the most effective, in that urges tend to occur in environments similar to those the habit occurred in the past. If an urge feels overwhelming, remove self from the situation until it subsides.

    Cognitive distraction can be very powerful as well as convenient. You can use imagery to take your mind off particularly powerful urges. Conjuring a pleasant place like a beach, or a raft on a lake can help you take your mind off the urge and relax. Relaxing images are not helpful for everyone. Some even find that relaxation increases the strength of a craving. This makes sense. Many habits are associated with relaxation and pleasure. If this is true for you, find some mental task that will be very difficult to finish but is interesting and consuming. Think about developing Mental Tapes. Examples of helpful tapes are: Mentally writing the perfect epic novel or screenplay. Planning the perfect vacation. Creating the ideal money-making business. Interpreting a dream from the night before. Picking an acquaintance and trying to "figure them out." What you choose will depend on your interests, but the key is to make it something easy, interesting, and fun to do. Here's what NOT to do: choosing to think about all the mistakes you've made this year; how you could have done things differently, what a failure you are ... These "tapes" won't be enjoyable. They may even increase your urges, especially if stress has precipitated your habit in the past. Though these techniques may feel awkward initially, with practice they can become almost automatic. Give them a try! What do you have to lose?

    Robert Westermeyer, Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist with the Center for Cognitive Therapy in La Jolla, California. He specializes in the treatment of Addictive Behavior. Copyright c 1996 by Pioneer Development Resources, Inc.. All rights reserved.
    If you do not live the life you believe, you will believe the life you live.

    #2
    COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

    Great information, Thanks P4T!

    Comment


      #3
      COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

      thanks this is great!

      I used something similar when I gave up smoking. I had read somewhere that some research had showed that they had timed cravings experienced by people who were giving up smoking, and that on average they lasted 3 minutes. Every time I wanted a cigarette I told myself that I just needed to get through the next 3 minutes and that relaly helpd.

      Unfortunately the alcohol ones last 24 hours for me, but reading stuff like this helps remind me it is all in my mind!!

      mame
      Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn

      Harriet Beecher Stowe

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        #4
        COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

        Thanks Allie!
        Forever loved, forever missed Papa Bear

        Comment


          #5
          COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

          Mame,

          So true for me as well -- it really is a matter of gaining control over our thinking. The part of this article that has helped me the most is catching our thoughts when we begin to think unrealistic thoughts such as, "this is awful" or "I will never make it". I have begun stopping those types of thoughts dead in their tracks and although not ecnoring the reality that I am desiring to drink, but rather putting it into proper perspective; being that I am in no physical pain, only a bit out of my comfort zone. Okay, so it makes me "uncomfortable" at times when I dont get my way. So what. Its not like I'm in labor giving birth or just stubbed my toe on something. Also, since I like lifting weights to build muscle tone, I try to view each uncomfortable moment that I press through as lifting a weight and gaining strength to a new muscle that needs to be strengthened. The more we use it, the stronger it becomes!
          If you do not live the life you believe, you will believe the life you live.

          Comment


            #6
            COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

            Great IDEAS....GREAT TOOLS...
            sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!

            Comment


              #7
              COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

              If[pre] an urge feels overwhelming, remove self from the situation until it subsides[/pre].

              Thanks for sharing this with us P4T. very helpful. I must say i had the overwhelming one last thursday and it was very powerful. Felt like a headless chicken in the super market not sure what i was doing feel like i could of just brokedown.... Yes and once i got out of there it did subside.

              Love
              Teardrop.x
              family is everything to me

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                #8
                COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

                Great Info P4T ~ Thanks! Sometimes it we don't hear those thoughts until we think back on the urge event and then seem to see it so clearly. It takes practice to hear the thoughts as they come and dispel them. I'm going to start paying closer attention!
                AF since Jan. 1, 2008 .... It all began right here


                Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice, you made it now.


                (from the Movie "Once")

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                  #9
                  COPING WITH URGES - GREAT ARTICLE

                  Thanks so much P4T !! I'm going to cut and paste and then file this great article of yours xxx

                  ~ I hear a whinny on the wind~

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