suggest some help please!

[Seashell]

Hi haven't been here for a long time, but hey I'm back for now anyway!! i have tried supplements and the tapes, but nothing has worked for me. I think it is purely lack of willpower. I love the taste, I love the effect, I have a stressful life so, I just love to sit and relax and end the day in a mindless world. BUT I know it cant go on and will only get worse. It is so hard. Any suggestions gratefully received

[cymru]

suggest some help please!

Youve got to want it sea. Ive known for so long that i was ruining my life and slowly killing myself, but couldnt get away from that 'buzz' Its something youve got to really want to do. You have to do it for yourself. Its like smoking, you know its killing you, but until you really want to stop it aint going to happen. Stick with us, join the army and think of all the positive things that will come with not drinking.
Do you really LOVE the effect, or are you addicted to it?

[gabby1go]

suggest some help please!

Seashell,

I started a book by Debbie Ford entitled "The Best Year of Your Life". It is a little hokey but has helped me stay focused everyday on living a better life and gives me hope. It takes some work but makes me think about the future. Maybe it could help you as well? Gabby.

[DeeBee]

suggest some help please!

Seashell,

Have you considered one of the meds to help you? I took Topa for 3 months and it really helped me to firstly cut down drastically and then go AF.

But like CY mentioned you really have to get your game plan together and WANT to quit.

[Wade72]

suggest some help please!

Well I did a residential rehab quite a number of years ago. Was the most productive and important 6 weeks of my life. Never looked back and 10 years later no problems.

[july232007]

suggest some help please!

Seashell,

The idea of quiting completely can be overwhelming. Start with a modest but serious goal. Write it down and believe it, and as others have said truly want it.

I think sometimes we are so afraid of failure that we are fearful to really try hard at something like going AF.

For me it was to set two goals: (1) AF for 30 days; and if I was sucessful at that (2) AF for life. I have completed goal one and I am living goal two. It took me several years to get to the point where I could honestly say I really wanted to quit more than I wanted to drink.

Be fair to yourself but be honest. When you are ready, make the leap and believe.

July

[Ripple]

suggest some help please!

Shells ... you will handle stress much better without AL ..... i know it is so difficult to understand that concept. Plan on a time of year that is more quiet to work on your sobriety ... slowly eliminate AL ... decide what you want to change in your life and focus on that, exchange one for the other .... it works. Use this forum to burn tension off ... there is so much here to help you. You can change. :l

[Evie.Lou]

suggest some help please!

Just think about how EMPOWERING it will feel,to run your own life,make your own choices.When I was drinking AL called the shots as to what I did and even what I thought.Now I feel a wonderful sense of FREEDOM...You can feel that too but first you have to want it...Then take small steps daily towards getting it...Stay close..we can help..

[AAthlete]

suggest some help please!

Seashell;406760 wrote: I love the taste, I love the effect, I have a stressful life so, I just love to sit and relax and end the day in a mindless world.....

Sea, this parts sucks but the first thing you're going to have to do is let go of this romance that you have with alcohol. Escaping to a mindless world was something that I craved as well, but we are only fooling ourselves.

All we are really doing is running from our problems.... but is becomes such an easy escape doesn't it???

Isn't it amazing that alcohol can make us say "I love the taste, I love the effect.." instead of "I love the money I waste, I love the fact that it is slowly killing me.."

That's the power that it can have if we let it. You have to CHOOSE to not let it have that power and that starts with completely changing how you look at alcohol. As so many have said before, we treat it as a lover when in fact it's trying to kill us....

[savon19]

suggest some help please!

july232007;406865 wrote: Seashell,

The idea of quiting completely can be overwhelming. Start with a modest but serious goal. July

This is SO true - especially if we've tried and failed numerous times! We then tend to think, well, why even TRY, since we've failed before.

But if we don't try, we Definitely won't succeed.

(I'm in process of convincing myself to TRY!!!)

[nancy]

suggest some help please!

I think I remember reading somewhere that we can have a tendency to remember the good things as opposed to the bad consequences and maybe that is what you are doing now.

I don't think you would be on this website if everything was good and relaxing. I think temporarily, yes, but it creates so much anxiety/depression/lack of self-esteem/physical health problems in the longer term. It actually makes you sick!

Who needs that.

It sure is hard to create new ways of dealing with stress, but so much worth it!

[Seashell]

suggest some help please!

Thank you some really good advice from all I particularly liked one which i will bare in mind I do want to stop its just hard work saying goodbye to a old friend and companion who has been with me virtually every night for quite a long time now. But who needs a friend who will eventually ruin your life or even kill you
:thanks:.

I will start tonight

[livingfree]

suggest some help please!

Yes Seashell - you need an official "break up". You can do it in a letter.

[Seashell]

suggest some help please!

didn't manage it ! my partner phoned 2 ask if i wanted sum wine of course i said yes. he didn't drink makes me wonder if he likes the fact that he has this over me, so if we ever split up he could use it against me!!!!!!!!!

[Determinator]

suggest some help please!

Seashell, first off welcome back!

if you are really good and ready to do this, then here's your ticket: antabuse.
that simple step will transform you into a world where al simply no longer is an option on the table and you can just get along with your new self. it's worked for me! Feel free to pm anytime if you like.
You CAN do this!