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AF Army 21st September 2008

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    #151
    AF Army 21st September 2008

    Hi again all, so sorry some of you aren't having the best of days. :l

    Krigs, was that your first real bad craving since you became AF? Well done for riding it through. I also find the L-Glut under the tongue a godsend.

    Feel a bit bored tonight, going to feed the dogs then go and do some online work- have neglected it terrible lately

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      #152
      AF Army 21st September 2008

      hows the shop looking marbs?
      To Infinity And Beyond!!

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        #153
        AF Army 21st September 2008

        It is now painted inside, although a bit patchy- will have to do a bit more tomorrow

        Tomorrow BF will lay the new lino- I am doing this on a shoestring so it will not be anythin Luuuussshhhhh but once all the shelves and stock is in, I dont think it will notice too much. Besides the only other shop nearby is a bread shop which is in a garage!

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          #154
          AF Army 21st September 2008

          I am so full of admiration for you Marbs. You are one motivated lady
          Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
          Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

          Comment

            #155
            AF Army 21st September 2008

            cymru;418354 wrote: hipps..forgot to say! I was bad the other night, wanting a drink, and the constant fighting it is a pain in the behind. Ive just been down the park, saw an empty bottle of cider and was overwhelmed by urges to drink. Then i realized i hadnt taken my campral...over 3 hrs late. Feel better now!
            Cym used to take the Anti D's and the Antabuse mate. I've come a long way to know that I don't need that stuff anymore. I first started taking the Anti,D's when I was 17 and went into counseling for something I'm not quite ready to talk to anyone about right now. It was the biggest upset in my life and from that day I have always considered myself to be less of a man that I truly am. Will I ever truly get over it? Don't know mate but I know I don't need anymore chemicals in my body at this point. They were a god send at times but I was first prescribed SEROXAT and I couldn't get off the damn things. When I first met my ex I was still taking the liquid form to try and reduce the dosage. She thought I was on methadone because I had these green liquid thimbulls in the fridge in my caravan!!!lol

            Totally drug free is the way for me to go these days. My last real 'bout' of depression came last Xmas when I felt so alone etc. I'd not long split from my ex and I was having a really hard time. I knew I was falling deeper and deeper into a depression but I did nothing. I feel these days I'm far too strong to have to take those tablets again. I know for a fact now I suffer with bouts of melancholy rather than depression. Ive done a CBT course called "Beating the Blues" too which helped immensily with my thinking process and how I needed to challenge my thoughts rather than let them drag me down. I know for FACT I'm a much stronger person now too for having this last slip where I've probably fucked things up totally with someone I really care about. Knew damn well my emotions were running away with me but again thought nothing of it until...............

            Anyway probably too much information right now!!lol

            I'm gonna try and find another link for TROPIC THUNDER. I love Ben Stiller's movies he makes me laugh so much!! Here's a link for a good movie site anyway 66Stage : Free Movies Online

            Love and Happiness as always

            That stupid arse hippie bloke!
            xx
            "Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh and the greatness which does not bow before children." Kahlil Gibran
            Clean and sober 25th January 2009

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              #156
              AF Army 21st September 2008

              Hey Marbs, Yes, since my first week I have been relatively crave-free. It was a humbling experience. I think what ultimately talked me out of the wine was knowing full well that taking that 1 drink would bring the cravings on full blast....I don't want to feel that way any more than I have to. How did the painting go today?
              "People usually fail when they are on the verge of success. So give as much care to the end as to the beginning." Lao-Tzu

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                #157
                AF Army 21st September 2008

                Im on antidepressants and campral at the mo, but once i get a job and think im enjoying it im going to try and go solo. Think all the drugs we did when younger effect us now hipps. Those 4/5 pills in a night, week after week in my teens,twenties, have def left my head a little pickled!
                Cheers for the site. Ill have a look now
                To Infinity And Beyond!!

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                  #158
                  AF Army 21st September 2008

                  I will try to get some pics of the shop in a few days- first I couldn't find my camera then it turned up, but now I can't find the cable I suspect one of the dogs might have something to do with that but I will sort something out!

                  Anyone got any more pics to post while I am doing the doggy dinner?!

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                    #159
                    AF Army 21st September 2008

                    I am too scared to come off mine or even think about it yet
                    Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
                    Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

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                      #160
                      AF Army 21st September 2008

                      Loved the cars...mine is an old transit van full of dents, and I have a scooter, as yet no dents.

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                        #161
                        AF Army 21st September 2008

                        I was too, but I had to try something I was at the end of my tether
                        Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
                        Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

                        Comment

                          #162
                          AF Army 21st September 2008

                          Me too. had a neighbour who went a bit loopy on them, but it had come to a point that i had to do something
                          To Infinity And Beyond!!

                          Comment

                            #163
                            AF Army 21st September 2008

                            If I had had the courage to stop drinking I probably would have done better. But I didnt.
                            Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
                            Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

                            Comment

                              #164
                              AF Army 21st September 2008

                              I have spent my life taking something to feel better so I figured why change now?
                              Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
                              Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

                              Comment

                                #165
                                AF Army 21st September 2008

                                Dont blame you one 2. Me and drugs always went )
                                Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
                                Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

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