The class that I went to teach drew a good group and we had fun.The dinner afterward went just fine, without temptation to drink.I felt like it had been a very successful trip until I got back to the Motel.I opened the fridge to but some soda in it and it was stocked with little bottles of Scotch, vodka and gin.there was Beer and 3 kinds of wine..I was FLOORED.I was taken by surprise.I had been having a gut feeling that something was gonna go wrong and here it was, starring me in the face.I was alone with AL.I took my notebook and started writing I DON'T DRINK, over and over.I tried to sleep but just tossed and turned.I finally got up and drove 3hrs.home.I started crying as soon as I walked in the door.I couldn't tell Hubby what had happened.I said that I was home early because I missed him, which i did.I am pretty shook up and feel very vulnerable.I thought that I was prepared for anything but I wasn't.How can I explain it to him when I, myself have no idea why AL has such a hold on me.I will know that i must check for Mini Bars in the room , from now on but I hate the way that it left me feeling about me...
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You have great strength!!!! You driving home in the middle of the night is awesome. Look at your outcome...you didn't drink. Congratulations.
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((((Evie)))))
You did great! You took yourself away from temptation. I am proud of you! :goodjob::lComment
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WOW Evie. That was quite an experience...but you made it through! Your trip was successful and your class went well...concentrate on that positive part of your trip and you will be fine. Sorry you had to go through that, Evie.
Kriger"People usually fail when they are on the verge of success. So give as much care to the end as to the beginning." Lao-TzuComment
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Those mini bars?!!!! Arrrrgh! Know exactly what you mean - ha, but you didn't take any. Trying to resist the mini bar once I got as far as taking a vodka bottle out of its holder, fortunately I didn't realise you were instantly charged and put it back, otherwise I would have thought, 'Oh, I've taken it out now, might as well drink it cos I've been charged anyway.'
I explained at the bar I'd but it back and they refunded me.Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; He's the one who will keep you on track. Proverbs 3:6 The MessageComment
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Wow Evie
I am sooo proud of you. That took great strength. Welcome home.:l"Decide-Which Voice in Your Head you Can Keep Alive" (Shinedown)Comment
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Evie,
Your posts has tugged at my heart.
I don't understand what this "thing" is that suddenly has my life siezed?
It has no value, I dump it in and know the consequences.
Just finished a week long binge and started the same routine early this AM and I feel such grief.
God knows we are good people, harmless in nature , so why this curse?
I am sad. I had 7 days and felt wonderfull and looked much lighter and then guzzled the poison.:notes:Theme2be
" Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections but instantly set about remedying them~everyday begin the task anew".-Saint Francis de SalesComment
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Thanks so much Guys,it shook me up.The mantra helped and all your encouraging words, before I left.I was ARMY STRONG, but when I took out the cute little sparkling wine and put it on the dresser, I knew that AL was gonna win, if I didn't get out of there,so I left...
I am so sorry Theme, I know that I only escaped by a thin string.I easily could have been on a binge right now.We just some how have to accept that the Beast is around every corner and can't let our guard down.You will get back up and together we will keep on beating this !!sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!Comment
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Evie I think it's always gonna have some 'control' in our lives; how great or small though depends on our own resolve and susceptibility to other influences. Doing what you did showed tremendous resolve. Namely, to get up and drive home rather than put yourself through any further ordeal. I would of been tossing and turning too and probably would of ended up having to pay for the whole mini-bar knowing my own resolve at present.
Glad though the time you spent with others was productive for you.
God bless you my friend
Love and Happiness
Hippie
xx"Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh and the greatness which does not bow before children." Kahlil Gibran
Clean and sober 25th January 2009
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Love you too,Happy Hippy.I'm gonna fess up to Will.I hate secrets..sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!Comment
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Wow Evie, well done.
When I was giving up cigs (many attempts over a number of years) it was always the not 'expecting to see a cig' that floored me- usually I would find a half full packet while cleaning the car or in a coat pocket or something.
I don't know why but that feeling of being caught by surprise, causes huge urges- well bloody done you for not caving.Comment
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Evie, i would of had to do exactly the same. Cannot have any alc around me as the temptation is a battle i dont want to enter as i will prob lose. You did great leaving and going home. That shows great character and a real will and determination to stay sober. you should be congratulated for it and feel good that you didnt drink.To Infinity And Beyond!!Comment
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Marabella,you're RIGHT...The suprise was what floored me...Huge Urge that I hope doesn't happen again...sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!Comment
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Thanks Chef,I don't plan on letting myself in for that surprise ever again...TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT..sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!Comment
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hi eve,som one once told me, welcom to the real world,you did fine,temptations are all around us,your home, and if you like to xplain to him how well you did tht is up to you.,do your eally think he would understand ,or would he tell u i told u so,he probably is a great guy ,but you told us 1st,its over, and your rt it will bite u in the butt,when u least x pect,yo sweet one you did great, gycoComment
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