Don't know why I did it

[Hopeful mom]

Only been on this site for a few days and have already blown it. I couldn't even go for a week. It's like this voice telling me to stop by the store and pick up a bottle of wine...just to have a glass or two to relax. End up drinking the whole bottle. The look in the eyes of my husband and children make me feel so low. Going thru depression and screwing up like this just makes me feel terrible. Want so badly to be in control (like everyone here). This site is so encouraging and I thought I'd finally found something that would put me on the right track. How do you guys do it? I am going to have to get some kind of meds to help me through this. Any suggestions? Help please!

[Evie.Lou]

Don't know why I did it

We do it by never giving up...L Glut. is a good anti craving and Kudzu helps but there is no magic pill.Eat Fresh grapes until you bust is a big help.Get the MWO book and design a plan of sobriety.Stay close and keep posting...You can do this, I know you can...

[Odie]

Don't know why I did it

Yesterday was my first day as a member of MWO - I know the temptation. I too drink wine to relax, sleep, forget about lifes challenges - I feel anxious about how to stay sober. The support and care that I received from the members and from reading the posts is very powerful. I just went through the same depression - I went on a binge Friday, stayed sober Saturday and then binged on Sunday. I was so depressed yesterday that I wanted to drink - instead I logged onto this site and read the postings. I ordered the starter kit and book yesterday - I am very hopeful that this will assist me with this journey. I have had many re-starts as day number "1" after falling on day "2" or "3". You can do this - I will send a posting after I receive the starter kit and book and let you know how it is working. I look forward to hear how you are progressing.

[Hopeful mom]

Don't know why I did it

Thanks for the advice. I do have book and need to read again. Need to make a plan as you suggested.

[rubywillow]

Don't know why I did it

Hopeful, if you think we're all in control, read on!!! (my post "BLEW IT") What too many of us forget is it takes time and patience. We didn't get this way overnight, you know. I saw that look from my family this week end, when I should have been the strong one for them. Hang on, honey. It's one day at a time for all of us.

[bestlifeldms]

Don't know why I did it

We have all been where you are right now, feeling exactly what you're feeling. I always say I was the "Queen of try and try again". Just kept on trying until it worked. I had the same internal struggle, known to everyone here. :tempted: You can do this. For me, to be sober is to be free! Know that we are here for support! Read alot and post often! You can do this! :h

[Theme2be]

Don't know why I did it

I would like to second all of the above.
I have a similar story ; have not made it past day 7. But, oh when I do the way my whole being feels is indescribable.
As my favorite quote says, if it takes me 365 days a year to be free of this long enough to feel free of it, I will rise daily with that in mind.

I understand the discouragement, but, no matter what I have found that coming here and reading and lending a hand, even if in a small way, one feels hopeful.

Take good care.

[Hopeful mom]

Don't know why I did it

It is so encouraging to have you all here. I have never been able to talk to anyone about this problem who could relate. I would never go to AA because I am too embarrassed, and live in the same small city that I grew up in. Reading the posts gives me hope. Thank you all.

[cmhguy3]

Don't know why I did it

My only advice is come here often and try, try again! You already took the first step! Welcome!

[Hopeful mom]

Don't know why I did it

Thanks for the welcome and I will visit often.

[LookingToGrow]

Don't know why I did it

Welcome Hopeful! Your screen name says it all

[akmom]

Don't know why I did it

hopeful....Been there done that, have a closet full of t-shirts!!

You took the first step and we are here if you need us!!!

[Hopeful mom]

Don't know why I did it

When do you start feeling better about yourself?

[rubywillow]

Don't know why I did it

Today, I feel terrible again, cause I drank this weekend. But being here has helped so much, as usual. Feeling better is gradual. We don't wake up and say "We're cured!" because we're not. Don't think too far ahead. Get thru this day. Don't make promises you can't keep to others, because then you double your guilt. You're asking all the right questions, and you're here. That's where we start. People here can tell you lots of tricks to use. Read all the posts that look positive to you. I know you feel alone in this, but you're not. And the one's who are here understand EVERYTHING you say, and will support you.

[New Day]

Don't know why I did it

Hopeful Mom --- Don't be too hard on yourself .... this is a process. I too drank far too much wine almost every day for years and have always wanted to quit, or gain control. Since finding MWO I have had many, many more AF days in the past 2 months, but I have had my slips too. Each time I slip, it then gets easier to go AF for a few more days than before. You'll start feeling better about yourself as soon as you've got a few AF days behind you. You will be amazed at the renewed energy you'll have and appreciate waking up with a clear head. That is a feeling worth struggling through the desire to drink. We all know about that voice in your head telling you to drink .... "just one won't hurt" ... well, we all know where one leads to! Change your routine up when it comes to that "bewitching hour" when you'd normally have your first glass. I find fixing a diet tonic with lime & ice helps calm the urge.... as do L-Glutamine and the Kudzu capsules.
Keep coming here for support ... it's amazing.