Hi

[Bella]

Hello to you all.....I felt I needed to post and ask for your support. I have had a terrible couple of days. I have kept off the wine now for a good few months but the other night I found a load in our out-house...I opened a bottle (too early in the day) and had good intentions to just have a couple.....But...I suddenly felt myself turn into this frenzied person who had to get a high quickly. I drank to get drunk. I threw away the remainder down the sink and gained control for about half an hr and then opened another!! I felt like a really sad, bad person.....I hid the empty bottle, I opened another and drank with my husband until he went to bed...then I opened another, started feeling depressed and morose..and so thankfully I left the drink and walked up to bed....thank god. But, I have no control whatsoever with white wine......Please tell me if you have had this feeling before?

Thanks for listening....I had a really low day yesterday, it was not worth the pain, anxiety, cant cope feelings I have the day after the binge. I have to steer clear of wine...it turns me into a secretive liar and my confidence is rock bottom....

Bella XXXX

[cymru]

Hi

Bella, i have had that feeling with white wine every week for years. I would binge for 2-4 days on white wine, up to 3 bottles a day. I would black out, make myself ill and only stop when i physically couldnt keep anything in my stomach for more that a couple of seconds. I would feel as low as i could for days, hating myself and wishing i could stop. then after a week(maybe less) i would go through the process again.
I managed to stop for a lengthy period, but started again 2 years ago and it spirled out of control. I can imagine it must be hard finding wine like that. Who put that there!? I know that i can not have booze in the house as i will drink it if its here. You are not alone bella. Not by a long way. I have friends here on this site who have been through the same as us. be strong, get rid of any booze that is left, and start fresh this weekend. good luck and take care.

[Beaches]

Hi

Bella, nice to see you. Wine is my down fall as well and when I over do I feel like a shmuck in the morning too. Replaying the entire night over and over and beating myself up. You are right that it doesn't help with anxiety at all.

We just have to remember and drill it into our brains how we feel when we over do it and then move on.

Hope you start feeling better today.

[happydog]

Hi

hi Bella

Looks like you were doing so well, im not surprise after not drinking wine for a few months how its made you feel... yes any AL drink makes me feel bad and low and once i get started i cant stop and there are some drinks that makes me hyper that i have to stay well and clear of .... stay with us and get back on track you can do this again.
All the best.

Love
Teardrop.x

[Ripple]

Hi

Bella, i have drank a lot of wine in my life.. i certainly know very well what you are saying.. it took me a long time to understand wot i was dooin to myself ... i no longer touch it.. your time will come where you will finally say NO.. you are not alone on this. :l

[Cinders]

Hi

Bella,

Hi. It is good to see you again.

Yes, I have the same issue with anything alcoholic. Not just wine.

Once I start putting the poison in my body, I can't seem to stop. I once went 90 days and picked up a drink and was drunk within a couple hours.

So, for me, it is not dependent on what I drink, only that I drink.

You have done very well lately, and I know you can get it back. Just look at this experience for what is was. A learning experience.

Take care,
Cindi

[Bella]

Hi

Thankyou....a learning experience.....if only I did learn from it...Today I just feel so ill. My stomach hurts..like I have an acid feeling and I just plain and simply feel sick.....My poor liver, I have alot of making up to do with it!!!!! Ah well, thanks for your support and making me feel less of a sad waster....! BellaXXXXX

[tlrgs]

Hi

it happens to the best of us ..just find it within yourself to control the beast .. and walk away from it .. you can do this dont give and dont beat yourself up for it move on and learn from it .. there is life after al believe me it does get better .. stay strong and think positive

[IAD]

Hi

Bella.....You went a few months without drinking, start again........this battle with alcohol is a fight we must fight the rest of our lives ! Their might be some set backs, but just remmeber we fight this all our life. Good Luck. IAD.

[Chelle12]

Hi

Hi Bella,
Wine is definitely my downfall too. I have two cans of beer in the fridge, theyve been there for months and i wont touch them, but a bottle of wine? gone in 20 mins. got to the stage where I wasnt just buying it by the bottle, it was two bottles at a time, then 3, then the 'boxes' of wine.... which sado invented that?? I remember my fridge having marg, cheese and the whole second shelf devoted to two boxes of wine with those 'tap' things so i could stuff the neck of the wine glass up to it and pour, pour pour... lost track of how many glasses, but two boxes would last a weekend.
So.. you're not alone in having a wine habit.
It's bloody hard to stop, especially with adverts everywhere, bars in walking/staggering distance and off-licences on every corner... but YOU CAN DO IT!
If you can go a few months AF, then you can do it again, and again and again!
Every AF day you have under your belt is a major achievement
Hugs,
C