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Out in the wilderness.

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    #1

    Out in the wilderness.

    I've been feeling a bit lost lately. Don't quite know where or who I am anymore. I'm sat here at my computer at 2.40am and unable to sleep, yet unable to post anymore. I feel completely drained of all feeling. My head is telling me I have so much going for me; my daughter. Yet if it wasn't for her I hate to think were I would be right now. I'm just all over the place at the moment. I'm as high as a kite one minute and full of good intentions then the next day I'm feeling so low and down on myself. I know I've always had bouts of melancholy and I've rode those waves and got through. But this feels totally different. I feel in real danger of becoming depressed again. I know what I probably need to do but that option seems so hard right now.

    Anyway I just needed to vent. I'm gonna try and get some sleep and hope tomorrow I wake up with a brighter outlook.

    Love you ALL my friends
    Hips
    xx:l
    "Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh and the greatness which does not bow before children." Kahlil Gibran
    Clean and sober 25th January 2009
    Tags: None
    #2
    Out in the wilderness.

    Tried to PM you hours ago and your box was full.

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      #3
      Out in the wilderness.

      what ya doing up at this time of the night hippy? Its the middle of the day here. Sounds like you are tired and need a good nights sleep - go to bed you will feel much better in the morning. Sorry to hear you are a bit lost at the moment - are you taking any supplements - what about some St Johns warts and all. That might help? Thinking of you.
      BH

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        #4
        Out in the wilderness.

        Hippie, been there, done that, and still doing that. There are so many questions and so many ways to go with this. I guess the first is, what the hell do you want? Are you tired, restless , bitchy ( I am always bitchy), have you seen a doctor??? Blah, blah, blah. In my opinion, all questions and answers here are really great; I love feedback, but really, you and I know the answers lie within.
        Goal 1: Today
        Goal 2: Tomorrow

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          #5
          Out in the wilderness.

          I think you're right luk. i know what I have to do but that also brings so much heartache with that decision. It's not an easy one to make.

          Love hips xxxx
          "Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh and the greatness which does not bow before children." Kahlil Gibran
          Clean and sober 25th January 2009

          Comment

            #6
            Out in the wilderness.

            Glad you posted, Hipps, and glad you know that things will probably look better tomorrow. Feelings are funny things, sometimes they give us a glimpse of the abyss, sometimes a reprieve, sometimes joy... and in most cases, for no clear reason, and not for very long... Good if we can just note them as they pass, like clouds in the sky.

            wip

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              #7
              Out in the wilderness.

              What's the heartache about? Don't want to get personal, but you brought it out. You have your health and your baby. I am really not naive. I have two boys, and feel like this at times too---quite a bit actually. What more is out there that you really want? What more can there really be?
              Goal 1: Today
              Goal 2: Tomorrow

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                #8
                Out in the wilderness.

                Hippie,

                I have been there :l Yoga has helped me lots!!!



                You Tube....my friends with mercurial moods ; ) [ame=
                ]YouTube - FAMOUS PEOPLE WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER[/ame]



                PM me if you need anything,

                Luvya!

                Myheart
                Patience has its limits. Take it too far, and it's cowardice.
                - George Jackson

                Comment

                  #9
                  Out in the wilderness.

                  Hippie
                  Just saying hi- and you are not alone
                  Being human just blows sometimes.
                  But we are here with you
                  -Sheep

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Out in the wilderness.

                    Hi Hippie, I just read your post and I SO understand that feeling. It is me very often. What do i want, why am I low, am I a bad person, why why why???? and so it goes on. Then it is gone as quickly as it came. My lows are less now that i am not drinking but when they come I have to deal with them and not numb them with al or drugs. what I am trying to say is I KNOW how you feel you are not alone with that. If it helps to talk I am here.
                    I hope you wake feeling brighter today.
                    Take care
                    Love Startingover x
                    Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
                    Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Out in the wilderness.

                      :l

                      I am hoping you are feeling better. This too shall pass; it may not feel like it, but it will. Give Jasmine a big, skinny hug. :l:l:l
                      Goal 1: Today
                      Goal 2: Tomorrow

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Out in the wilderness.

                        Ive noticed that I can be the same , up and down like a fecking lunatic...no choice but to go with it I suppose...but arent the highs the best??

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Out in the wilderness.

                          just saw your post this morning Hippie.......I hope you are in the land of nod now.......My advice to you is....when you wake today, get out and about....get some fresh air into you. Sitting on the computer will make you more depressed...it does me anyway. Go for a run and you will come back with some natural endorphins inside you. You are probably thinking....shove off Bella, you dont understand....but I do know how it feels to be so down you cant see a way out and cant be bothered to see a way out....Am I right or totally off track here? Ah well.....its upto you isnt it....I'm here for you. Come on now Hippie...you are made of strong stuff.......Lots of love, Bella XXXXXX

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Out in the wilderness.

                            Hippie
                            What do you mean you know what you have to do. Nothing bad I hope??
                            Stay strong and let us know you are okay today.
                            BH

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Out in the wilderness.

                              A song for Hippie!

                              [ame=
                              ]YouTube - Bob Dylan - Shelter From The Storm (1976 Hard Rain)[/ame]

                              Comment

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