But what prompted this post was (again) someone started a thread with love and support as a goal and it has quickly taken a turn for the worse.
Is the issue here really Drinking While Posting? I used to think so, but not anymore. The real issue should be posting responsibly whether you're drinking at the time or not. I have seen some very nasty posts out there from some self proclaimed sober people. So obviously drinking while posting isn’t what’s causing fuel to the fires. I don’t want to hear that we have to have sympathy for the drunk people, because they didn’t know what they were doing. I disagree. If you posted it, then be an adult about it when you sober up the next day. It can be a bitter pill to swallow, but we have all been there so you are not alone. We are here to help and most people are very understanding. I have seen so many people forgive so many other members for past posts, simply because someone was adult enough to apologize. Not hide behind another sign-on name, but hell that’s another issue. I could start a whole new thread on phony people with their sneaky new sign-on names and nasty PMs vs. sugary sweet public posts, but I digress.
To get back on topic….Why can’t people simply respect another’s opinion on a subject? So what if you don’t agree with what they think. So many here claim they do respect others opinions and then they turned around and attack someone’s post. I am really beginning to recognize the repeat offenders and some of the patterns are hysterical. I really just don’t get it.
There are ways to diplomatically disagree with someone without being rude. It is also possible to have healthy debates without sarcasm. The choice is your’s and your’s alone. But don’t be shocked (or worse, accuse someone of wanting to cause drama) simply because they feel the need to defend themselves. Oh, and if you get caught in a lie because you post one comment on one thread and a different one on another, well then you are going to get called out on it. Again, it’s about being responsible for your own posts and comments whether you posted drunk or not.
In my opinion, this bull of Oldies vs. Newbies, Afers vs. Mods, Sober posters vs. Drinking posters, etc has got to cease. People accusing others of having “cliques” is really wearing thin. Some people who have been here awhile have made friends. So what? Does that mean that jealous barbs should be thrown at them? If you want a friend, make a friend. Please don’t be jealous and upset of others. It’s not their fault if people like them. Give people time to get to know you. The more you share, the more people will get to know you.
Myself and others that I know have been personally attacked more than once for being AF. Can you believe that? I know it’s just jealously but please don’t think it‘s just the drinkers that get picked on. We have lost a lot of fantastic AF members because nasty jealous remarks have been made about their sobriety. When I first came here, I hung on the words of every long term AFer I could read about. I absorbed their advice like a sponge. But it seems advice like that is definitely not welcome by all that’s for sure. And it’s with that sense, people can’t help but question one’s sincerity about being here and wanting help. I often think, why the hell do I come back if my advise is no longer wanted. Why put myself in a position of being attacked simply for trying to help. Anyone else notice the long term AFers are dropping like flies? Don’t assume it’s because life moves on for them. Believe me, because I am in touch with some via PMs.
So now we have threads where people need to feel "safe" to post. Is this what we have resorted ourselves to? Us vs them? This is sad.
Are you here to get help with your alcohol consumption or not? If not, please respect the forum and find another website to socialize on. If you truly want help, then you will not find a better website or program than this one. We are here for you.
I have been made to feel unwelcome on so many occasions that it’s not funny. But I do come back because the good here far out ways the bad.
Just my 2 cents…
Love, Me
:l
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